[floralia]

Hi. I don't know anything about marking so can't help you with what grade it deserves, but one thing I would say is that you need to be more assertive with your answer in some parts.

For example:

"And I could go as far to say that maybe they even both share the same status which is minute or even nothing." makes it sound like even you're doubting what you are writing. Obviously you aren't going to know this, you aren't Steinbeck, so you don't have to keep reiterating that it's your opinion which may or may not be true. When you're trying to convince someone of your point of view using language like that doesn't really help.

But yeah, I agree with other posters that you do generally need to work on your style of writing, it seems a bit confused and informal at points.

Hope that helps.

[carpe diem 123]

13/15

[CUFCDan]

(Original post by techno836)
definately B ( and i mark year 9 papers and a few year 10's i did this controlled assessment last year (im currently in year 10 ) ..

Either you're lying or our education is going down the pan

[M4LLY]

Tbh it does look a bit short

[techno836]

(Original post by CUFCDan)
Either you're lying or our education is going down the pan

haha i know what you mean :L i mark the lower sets because ive completed my CA's and because i want to do medicine or SEN its good experience for me my teacher says ( he helps me mark and they are all checked through him so dont panic our education is fine ) :L

[Booyah]

In addition to my earlier point you need to put everything into context, use historical background i.e. the wall street crash, the Dust bowl.. The great depression. The idea of the ranch is to be a microcosm of the real world. Thats coming from a guy who got an A, if you relate everything back to the question with context you can get an A or and A*, that is what seperates good essay writers from the herd.

[matty123]

I would give it a low C. You just simply have not answered the question! The question is asking for social and historical details, not details about Candy's personality, but how he represents sociaty.

[ArtisticFlair]

You've made some good comments about his character, but as other people have said, you haven't related them to ideas about society in the 1930s. Go and look up an Of Mice and Men study guide and look at the notes on the context of the novel, there may be some stuff there...

[tsveta]

he's probably marking you harshly to get you to worry about your exam coming up. it could be a B. I got Bs in my mock English lit and English Lang exams for GCSE and ended up with an A and an A*, probably because my teacher constantly marked me really harshly

[batikyh]

I am currently studying Of Mice and Men and I think that a C was a little bit harsh. I think you should have got a B. But I understand why you may have obtained that mark. You haven't really explored the ideas of society. Granted, you have commented on themes etc. but in terms of the question, you have focused more on the character of Candy and not how Steinbeck has used him to portray ideas about society. You could have written about the racial discrimination and prejudice that were rife during those times and how exactly Candy is shown to portray these. Just remember to stick to the question but, it is a great answer!