[Some random guy]

Apparently this content is not appropriate for this forum, even though it is in jest. Sorry folks, don't want to invoke the banhammer!

[+ polarity -]

._.

[nickss]

Far too sexy, I had to stop after the first line as I was getting too excited


Genuinely funny though

[TheSownRose]

Not gonna lie, my heart rate has picked up...

Spoiler:

Show

Ok, I did lie.

[Bobifier]

(Original post by Some random guy)
He grabbed her by the hair and pummeled her face in with his scarred knuckles to prevent further resistance.

Pure sex.

[VeniViciVidi]

I accidentally, all over my keyboard.

[Some random guy]

(Original post by VeniViciVidi)
I accidentally, all over my keyboard.

You accidently what?

[internet tough guy]

slight semi

[cl_steele]

i think im on that weird part of TSR again...

[bluemax]

[Casshern1456]

Is this caveman, sick.

[Some random guy]

(Original post by Casshern1456)
Is this caveman, sick.

It turned you on didn't it.

[chronic_fatigue]

Keep up the good work OP.

[ELs123]

I see you have spoke of one of the nicer cavemen.


That was amazing.

[anonstudent1]

Just watch some flintstone porn instead (this actually exists)

[the bear]

(Original post by Some random guy)
The hairy man stood with arms outstretched, blocking the only exit from the cave. Sweat covered his naked body and glistened like freshly applied oil, large drops dripping from the ends of erected hairs on his body like raindrops slipping off leaves after a bout of rain. His pot belly wobbled with every movement as he advanced towards her and his member was like the stump of a downed tree, hard as the spear he used to hunt. His eyes were afire with desire and he licked his brown teeth and swollen lower lip where she had hit him. There was a sudden eruption as gas escaped from his rump buttocks and filled the chamber with the smell of the day's raw mammoth. He had worked tirelessly to provide for the tribe and now he had come to claim his right of pleasure.

He grabbed her by the hair and pummeled her face in with his scarred knuckles to prevent further resistance. Her body went limp and he mounted her like the dogs did, smashing her frail frame against the wall of rock. When a scream escaped her lips, he turned her around and plugged her mouth with his swollen club. He felt her tongue push against his manhood like a cornered gazelle. He looked down at her face and saw the tears flowing from her eyes like the waterfalls in the valley. Passion quickly took him over the edge, and he moaned to the spirits as his snake expanded, spitting it's venom deep within her throat. Satisfied, he threw her onto the straw mattress followed by the bloody greasy leftovers of mammoth leg he had been chomping on still as he took her. Then he went out into the night to watch the fighting contest.

Thoughts + comments are much appreciated.

The magic failed when i reached this

[daveywavey]

That really turned me on. Keep it up

[cognito_08]

I came.

[Some random guy]

Chapter 2.

The Hairy Man had won the fighting contest. As reward, Mighty Chief's daughters offered their treasure troves. Hairy Man started by eating the fungul growth between their toes. A putrid aroma engulfed his nostrils and he sniffed it down with excitement. Mighty Chief's elder daughter was gifted with a dong and she then penetrated Hairy Man's hairy arse like a sabre tooth tiger. Hairy Man himself slid his trunk deep within the younger daughter's cavern, breaking down the barricade with ease, blood flowing freely as she became a woman. They went at it till a new sun was born, howling like a pack of wolves.

Finally all Hairy Man's muscles became stiff save for his javelin. It was limp like a worm. Hairy Man's butthole was sore so Elder Daughter removed her horn, releasing the mammoth meat that had been trapped within. It sprayed out like a gieser all over her. Father had taught her never to waste food and she lapped it up eagerly. Hairy Man retreated to his cave to rest, the sobbing of Younger Daughter fading until it was naught but a faint whisper.

This chapter was a lot harder to write, running out of metaphors

[Leon Trotsky]

Wonderfully written bold images, and masterfully paced. Sexy to boot. 9/10.