[Anonymous]

Last year was the worst year in my life, possibly one that has changed it forever. At the end of 2010 i started to become very depressed with college and i felt lonely and stressed from the work. I started to try out smelling inhalants, hairspray/nail varnish/deodrant to get the feeling of euphoria, because it replicated the passion i used to have for my interests. I never thought ever that this could damage me, or even kill me. I even thought that it wasn't drug abuse, and it was just part of some weird thing i had. I would hide hairspray bottles in my room, and spray it onto a cloth so i could inhale it. This went on for 6-8 months, i never noticed that i was depressed at the time. My great grandma died in my exam period and i literally could not focus on anything, my addiction got worse and continued into the summer. I remember a few hours after inhalaing i got really stressed and had a huge mood swing, a couple of minutes later i suffered from my first panick attack, i thought i was going to die as soon as my heart was beating too fast. I was rushed to casuality and they found i was aneamic, there was no reason for my anemia, and i didn't want to tell anyone i was inhalaing substances because i thought they would think i was weird. I put my aneamia down to substance abuse, as this has been proven, substances sap oxygen from the body. I have responded to aneamia treatment well, and everything is normal. I ammediately stopped inhalaing substances after my panick attack, and in a way, i am glad i had the panick attack, as a warning to stop. A few weeks later i told my mum i had been substance abusing, and i felt really guilty and upset, because it might have done permanat damage to my body. We went to the doctor about it, but she said it's probably not affected me permanatly. It's been 9 months since, i have had memory loss, endocrine problems. I've also had brain fog, but that only started 2 months ago.

[Dee Leigh]

Perhaps go and see your GP...

This was posted from The Student Room's Android App on my GT-S5830

[xTazx]

Ok whoa whoa whoa. It seems like you need a kind ear, and you want to just let it all out. That's fine.

What keeps you going? And happy?

While it hasn't affected you permanently, obviously the bigger issue is your mental health isn't fine. Go to your GP, and let him/her know you would like conselling/a psychologist. GP's aren't really trained to be able to help you, but these people can really help you go through your problems.

If you need a kind ear, I'm more than happy to get a PM and be a kind ear, until you get proper help that you need and deserve.