[jo d]

Do you really like shy/non-confident people?

Are we just too PC and say "ah, bless 'em" too much?

[buildalegohouse]

I'm naturally shy, and I have the worst confidence issue. I don't want people's sympathy, I want them to help me come out of my shell, get me into the conversation, push me into situations I would otherwise feel uncomfortable in. Besides, I'm not some animal at the zoo people simply point at and observe.

[jo d]

(Original post by buildalegohouse)
I'm naturally shy, and I have the worst confidence issue. I don't want people's sympathy, I want the to help me come out of my shell, get me into the conversation, push me into situations I would otherwise feel uncomfortable in. Besides, I'm not some animal at the zoo people simply point at and observe.

But people are people. Who are you to stop them commenting of they want to?

[buildalegohouse]

I'm not telling them to stop commenting, people are free to do what they like, I have no control over that. I'm simply telling you my opinion. People with confidence issues aren't going to get over thier shyness if they're given sympathy, that only worsens the problem.

[BlueOyster]

I am very shy too, have very low confidence. Could be cause of the autism or dyslexia.
Thing is that I people who do not suffer from shyness or low confidence a lot of the time can not understand why it is so hard to mix or talk with other people. But like a lot of the things it can be overcome.

^_^

[Tilly87]

I don't mind people who are a bit shy and who you need to make some effort to become friends with because that's quite natural. However some effort must be made on the other person's part - they must be able to open up to you eventually, otherwise you can never really be close friends.

[jo d]

(Original post by buildalegohouse)
I'm not telling them to stop commenting, people are free to do what they like, I have no control over that. I'm simply telling you my opinion. People with confidence issues aren't going to get over thier shyness is they're given sympathy, that only worsens the problem.

lol... MY opinion is that we are too soft on shy people. I don't see why anybody should be shy as such.

[jo d]

(Original post by Tilly87)
I don't mind people who are a bit shy and who you need to make some effort to become friends with because that's quite natural. However some effort must be made on the other person's part - they must be able to open up to you eventually, otherwise you can never really be close friends.

Why is that confident people's issue?

I think it lends to leaving the shy on the curb, we don't need them.

[Tilly87]

(Original post by jo d)
Why is that confident people's issue?

I think it lends to leaving the shy on the curb, we don't need them.

Why is what a confident person's issue?

[InspectorSophie]

When I get nervous and flustered in a new situation with new people I can't shut up. I'm so extroverted but its a nervous tick. It actually is just a strange symptom of shyness.

When I am calm, I am actually the silent confident broody type. I actually prefer me when I am more withdrawn and jealous of people who have that self control. When I'm feeling shy I get on my own nerves with how obnoxious and chatty I can be.

[jo d]

(Original post by Tilly87)
Why is what a confident person's issue?

I meant why should confident people care if the "shy" need comforting? As said, we should just throw them onto the curb.

[I<3LAMP]

I bought my bf a T Shirt that says:

Just Shy
Not Antisocial
(You can talk to me)

http://store.xkcd.com/xkcd/#JustShy

He is so shy in social situations and I hate overpowering him (I'm a chatterbox) but with his Tee people smile and talk to him rather than think he's a weird guy in the corner watching and listening to everyone.

[Tilly87]

(Original post by jo d)
I meant why should confident people care if the "shy" need comforting? As said, we should just throw them onto the curb.

I didn't say shy people need comforting but if you're a decent person you should understand that someone being shy doesn't mean they don't want to be friends with you, so initially you should make more of an effort to say hi or whatever. Then when they've seen you a few times they will probably get more confident and friendly.

[Notethis]

It's a disability.

[Rarrgh]

(Original post by jo d)
I meant why should confident people care if the "shy" need comforting? As said, we should just throw them onto the curb.

Your saying that people with certain personalities are not even equal to other humans? Your some sick twisted moron.

I've been shy and introverted my whole life due to moving schools repeatedly and always getting bullied, however i've never stopped trying to make friends and be outgoing, the fact of the matter is it's just not me. I don't like many people, and my interests do not fit in with what most people like so it makes it extremely hard to get an interesting conversation going with people.

And on re-reading what you posted, shy people don't need comforting. They just need people to respect that they aren't always the most outgoing people.

But yeah obvious troll but couldn't help myself.

[jo d]

(Original post by Tilly87)
I didn't say shy people need comforting but if you're a decent person you should understand that someone being shy doesn't mean they don't want to be friends with you, so initially you should make more of an effort to say hi or whatever. Then when they've seen you a few times they will probably get more confident and friendly.

I don't see what is so "decent" about fearing people so much, one is quiet in interactions. I don't see why such people should be entertained, since they clearly view themselves as inferior.

[jo d]

(Original post by Rarrgh)
Your saying that people with certain personalities are not even equal to other humans? Your some sick twisted moron.

I've been shy and introverted my whole life due to moving schools repeatedly and always getting bullied, however i've never stopped trying to make friends and be outgoing, the fact of the matter is it's just not me. I don't like many people, and my interests do not fit in with what most people like so it makes it extremely hard to get an interesting conversation going with people.

But yeah obvious troll but couldn't help myself.

I'm just citing my opinion. I don't see why non-confident people should be tolerated.

[Rarrgh]

(Original post by jo d)
I'm just citing my opinion. I don't see why non-confident people should be tolerated.

Okay, why shouldn't they. What have they done to you that you believe means that they should not be treated as equals?

[jo d]

(Original post by Rarrgh)
Okay, why shouldn't they. What have they done to you that you believe means that they should not be treated as equals?

the very notion of being fearful of others is nonsensical.

[CJM13]

(Original post by jo d)
I'm just citing my opinion. I don't see why non-confident people should be tolerated.

I don't really see why people like you should be tolerated, who look down on others for being different to themselves.