[Anonymous]

I am currently a first year and I moved in to a shared house with second and third years in September. This was because I was a late applicant and I could not get halls. There is this one girl who I live with who will talk to everyone else in the house but me. This has been going on since I moved in, at first I thought it could be because she is shy and didn't know me previously to moving in and already knew the others. When I would say hi should would just ignore me and pretend that I wasn't there. I knew that I didn't want to live there with those people again next year, so I found a place with my course mates super early in the beginning of November. They sorted out a smaller house for next year, because the third years were leaving, this was done without me. I only found out after they had sorted it out, but it didn't matter because I had found somewhere already.
Well last month I finally decided that I should confront this girl, we were alone together in the kitchen. I asked her if she had a problem with me and then she just rolled her eyes. So I asked her again and she said and I quote "I don't like your type of people". I was shocked I knew what she meant as I am half black, but I asked her what she meant by that and her reply was "you know exactly what I mean" then I told her "no I don't, do you want to tell me?" and she fired back saying "it's because your not white".
I took myself home and I didn't come back for a long time, I only came back for my exams and there over soon, but I can't stand being in this house. Is it worth moving out or should I put up with it for another week?
I'm just shocked that people are still like that, I told the girls that I'm living with next year and they were shocked and disgusted.
Would you class this as bullying or abuse?

[whatsername2009]

(Original post by Anonymous)
I am currently a first year and I moved in to a shared house with second and third years in September. This was because I was a late applicant and I could not get halls. There is this one girl who I live with who will talk to everyone else in the house but me. This has been going on since I moved in, at first I thought it could be because she is shy and didn't know me previously to moving in and already knew the others. When I would say hi should would just ignore me and pretend that I wasn't there. I knew that I didn't want to live there with those people again next year, so I found a place with my course mates super early in the beginning of November. They sorted out a smaller house for next year, because the third years were leaving, this was done without me. I only found out after they had sorted it out, but it didn't matter because I had found somewhere already.
Well last month I finally decided that I should confront this girl, we were alone together in the kitchen. I asked her if she had a problem with me and then she just rolled her eyes. So I asked her again and she said and I quote "I don't like your type of people". I was shocked I knew what she meant as I am half black, but I asked her what she meant by that and her reply was "you know exactly what I mean" then I told her "no I don't, do you want to tell me?" and she fired back saying "it's because your not white".
I took myself home and I didn't come back for a long time, I only came back for my exams and there over soon, but I can't stand being in this house. Is it worth moving out or should I put up with it for another week?
I'm just shocked that people are still like that, I told the girls that I'm living with next year and they were shocked and disgusted.
Would you class this as bullying or abuse?

She sounds like a horrible person, but don't let her drive you out. Just ignore her and stick it out for another week, then you can leave and never have to see her ever again.

Do your other flatmates know what she said to you?

[Shabalala]

You should play around with her just don't let them bother you turn the uncomfortableness into amusment for you

Dress up and act like a stereotypical black person infront of her tell everyone in the house you are going to become a rapper and any other stereotypes for black people.

Nothing you can do about her views so just turn it around onto her

[Ishtiaq]

play tupac on full blast in the house

[Nana_A]

What university do you go to??

[foxes-are-ginger]

You should report her to the Uni...

[GreenLantern1]

(Original post by ThumbsUp)
Even though racism is wrong on all levels, you did drag it out of her. It's not like she came up to you on day one and said 'I don't like you because your not white' and then verbally and physically started abusing you. Even though its a sad situation, she was to an extent, quite civil about her stupid prejudices, so it was neither bullying nor abuse, it was simply an unfortunate situation for you to be in.

It is bullying, there is no denying it!

[gapyearstudent]

which uni is this???

[Reform]

Run around the house screaming 'Thug life' .

[James A]

(Original post by ThumbsUp)
Even though racism is wrong on all levels, you did drag it out of her. It's not like she came up to you on day one and said 'I don't like you because your not white' and then verbally and physically started abusing you. Even though its a sad situation, she was to an extent, quite civil about her stupid prejudices, so it was neither bullying nor abuse, it was simply an unfortunate situation for you to be in.

Your post has got to be nominated for 'TSR worst posts of the month'.

@ the negs. keep them coming

[AliceStrawbs]

That is absolutely vile. Tell your tutor.

[MancBoy]

What....WHAT!? Do people like this actually exist?

[bishbash72]

(Original post by Shabalala)
You should play around with her just don't let them bother you turn the uncomfortableness into amusment for you

Dress up and act like a stereotypical black person infront of her tell everyone in the house you are going to become a rapper and any other stereotypes for black people.

Nothing you can do about her views so just turn it around onto her

Second this. I'm thinking blaring rap music, pictures of Malcolm X everywhere, that kinda thing.

Either that or dress up like Carlton and eat cress sandwiches while listening to opera. That'd probably be even funnier.

[Indieboohoo]

Sounds like she's ignorant OP. Do you know what race or culture she is from?

[Octohedral]

It's unfair, but it's not really abuse - she's just ignoring you (I'm not belittling it, just giving you some consolation - I have heard of victims of some really hellish hate campaigns by housemates, so at least you don't have to go through that).

She was probably brought up by ignorant racist parents, and is too closed minded to change her mind. You have every right to be there, so don't leave, but if you react you will just reinforce her prejudices. There is no reason why you should be nice to her, but you can choose to be - show her you are above it, and be civil to her, and she may just realise how wrong she is. On the other hand, if she tries anything on get the university involved - you don't have to stand for it!

If you're really brave, make a cake, offer her some, and ask if she wants to talk about it. You might make a small difference in the world, and if you don't it's not your problem


(Or get your 6ft3 'cousin' to sort her out)

[Jordan_1]

Should have punched her right there and then.

Or if you have any other black friends you could have invited them round all the time.

[Da CorrupteD KiD]

It's a sad thing but you can't change her racist opinions. Neither can you report her because she's not actively bullying you, passive bullying yes but you can't report someone for not liking you. I think it's more important to accept this fact of life where you can't have everyone as your friend. It sounds like you've got some wonderful flatmates for next year so why not be positive and look forward to staying with them instead?

I have myself come across people who just don't like me, for no reason (race related or not) but I just have to learn to move on. I think it's part of growing up.

[I Gurn Hard]

It's an opinion. I don't like the french (or bloody liberals), so shoot me.

[pr0view]

Why don't you get on with your life she obviously doesn't like you and you can't change that. It doesn't sounds like she actively tries to bother you. Just live you life and she will live hers.

[lukewarm3]

(Original post by Anonymous)
I am currently a first year and I moved in to a shared house with second and third years in September. This was because I was a late applicant and I could not get halls. There is this one girl who I live with who will talk to everyone else in the house but me. This has been going on since I moved in, at first I thought it could be because she is shy and didn't know me previously to moving in and already knew the others. When I would say hi should would just ignore me and pretend that I wasn't there. I knew that I didn't want to live there with those people again next year, so I found a place with my course mates super early in the beginning of November. They sorted out a smaller house for next year, because the third years were leaving, this was done without me. I only found out after they had sorted it out, but it didn't matter because I had found somewhere already.
Well last month I finally decided that I should confront this girl, we were alone together in the kitchen. I asked her if she had a problem with me and then she just rolled her eyes. So I asked her again and she said and I quote "I don't like your type of people". I was shocked I knew what she meant as I am half black, but I asked her what she meant by that and her reply was "you know exactly what I mean" then I told her "no I don't, do you want to tell me?" and she fired back saying "it's because your not white".
I took myself home and I didn't come back for a long time, I only came back for my exams and there over soon, but I can't stand being in this house. Is it worth moving out or should I put up with it for another week?
I'm just shocked that people are still like that, I told the girls that I'm living with next year and they were shocked and disgusted.
Would you class this as bullying or abuse?

since you will be living with friends soon.. get all your friends to come round while she's in the house. If you do this rather than the situation being awkward for you, it will just make her feel stupid for being a racist when everyone is talking and joking with you. She may even realise she has been wrong to ignore you, and if she storms off than you and your friends will have a fun time annoying her anyway