So i really need help as i guess i could be bordering on social anxiety due to this problem.
I knew this girl during freshers week and we were alright with each other. However in this clique that we used to belong together in, she seemed closer to others than to me. Which to me seemed rather normal at that point of time since i was never a "clique person". I like to hang out with everyone but that clique is rather exclusive. We hung out with each other for about the first month of freshers.
However, one fine day my friends came to tell me that they think this girl is very fake in her actions and is a hypocrite. I did not really want to gossip and, like i always do, i just said "o really? I never thought that way" Yet since then i did realise that what they said were true especially in her treatment towards me. She is alot more sincere and nice to the others in the group. When we go out together she would ask to take a photo with everyone but me, until i go "hey lets take one too" (in a casual tone of course) .
Soon, as work load became more than what i could handle (two months into the year), and getting into certain leadership positions sure didn't help, i decided to leave this clique in the sense that i do not join them for meals and outings anymore and naturally, as time passes they do not invite me as well ,since i guess attendance is important when u wanna be part of them. Then, she became more than distant...she became rude. Once she sat next to me, and i told her that the girl in front of us got a boyfriend. She then, instead of replying me, turned to the girl and told her what i said, then telling me then i deserved it since she was right in front. That made me started ignoring her too..it's one thing to be angry, and i figured it's another thing to be rude...so if u can't be matured about your anger, I dont want her as a friend as well.
Also, one time i was trying to campaign for a position and talked to her about voting in the library. Then i decided i should apologise, just in case she got angry about it since she was studying. She said it was ok. Later on in the day my friend told me that she mentioned she was angry since i disturbed her during her studies.
These incidents made me rather angry and didn't really want to talk to her as well. However, as my anger subsided, i tried to just smile/say hi when i see her, and she would with a mumble.reply Not long after that, she just doesn't say hi anymore and when she sees that i am in front of her she would take another route just to avoid direct contact with me. since then even when i see her face to face i will turn away too cos i can no longer be bothered to be nice to her.
However, I always believed that no one will ignore you for no reason so this is really a first in my life. I did not ask her outright because i figured that if someone is angry with you, asking might make matters worse. But things just developed till i didnt wanna talk to her as well.
So basically my question is shld i ask her why for a peace of mind (bearing in mind that when she sees me now she just avoids me...and that she's been rude to me. Also not to mention that it's been a year plus) , or should i just let her be.
I dont want her as a friend anymore, but i've NEVER had someone be angry without a reason before, and when i dont see her, i dont really think about this—i rarely do see her around..but this year during exams, she sat behind me...so it made me think about the "possible reason" again..
Friends told me that the fact that i've been ignoring her too, asking her now would make it look as if im up to something, and it's not like she will make an effort to reply nicely..but do you guys think i should try just for curiousity's sake, or save my pride and self-esteem from potential verbal abuse/smirks and live with the curiousity?
Last edited by curiousitykillsthe; 16-05-2012 at 21:06.