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Attention seeking ('Look at me!') culture

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Applying to Uni? Let Universities come to you. Click here to get your perfect place 20-10-2014
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    I had a friend that wrote stuff like "People chatting **** about me well believe me it's not true you know who you are and I'm better than you." OR "Haters gonna hate but I share the love" OR "One day you will all work for me."

    Okay I made that last one up but you get the idea. So many statuses hitting out at everyone or anyone, like their life is so hard.

    In the end I just commented this: "You do realise every time you post these statuses you come off considerably worse than whoever you're writing about?"

    Then a bunch of people came to the girl's defence. Then some of them spammed my wall with **** like "Not Every1 can hav an easy life, U dont no wot yor chattin about". Then she blocked me.

    I also got blocked recently after this really pretty girl I know posted her 1000th picture of herself online and made a fuss about it. She was like "OMG totes didnt realise this was my 1000th pic! That is sooooo bad! I dont even look good in it". But ofc she looked AMAZING and she knew it and she had a truckload of responses from loads of girls going "You're beautiful" and loads of guys going "Oioi" and "I'd tap that". And then I posted "I'm sexy and I know it" and she sent me a bunch of hateful private messages and I felt sorry for her that in the midst of all those massive compliments she got so upset over my response which was hardly mean anyway and I almost said "Look your still beautiful and everyone knows it, we just get a bit tired when you're sticking it in our faces all the time. You don't need to be attention seeking about it and you don't need to photoshop your pics because you look awesome in them anyway." But then she blocked me. Oh well.

    Anyway, I avoid FB now. I sort of wish I'd put more photos from this year on there, because I've had a really awesome year and nothing to show for it, which is ironic because I have loads of photos from 2010 and that was a REALLY dull year in my life but I had a camera and cared more about making sure everything exciting ever went up on FB. Now I'm pretty tired of it, I feel like it's stopped me scrapbooking as I used to loads when I was younger but now stuff just goes up on FB and all those memories kinda go to waste. I'm still on FB solely for actual social purposes now. Either to msg as an alternative to texting or to find out about events that are organised on FB.

    I can't see any other reason to go on FB any more tbh.
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    Nothing beats when I saw "eating toast" in my news feed. My facebook was swiftly deleted after that.
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    (Original post by Madmachine)
    Nothing beats when I saw "eating toast" in my news feed. My facebook was swiftly deleted after that.
    The most stupid status I've read is "sleeping!!" :indiff:
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    (Original post by iLoveRobSwire<3)
    The most stupid status I've read is "sleeping!!" :indiff:
    Lol that's standard now. Everyone MUST know when you are sleeping these days. "eating toast" is definitely the worst. Imean if you were "eating caviar" or "eating lobster" then you may have a leg to stand on, but effing TOAST?!?!!!
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    People are so concerned of being boring they're taking photos every 2 minutes. But the thing is, if you're posing for a photo you're not in the moment, if someone takes a photo you're not expecting, you're in the moment. People act like they're having a good time, but they're acting. You spend your youth trying to prove you're living when you're not living. you're just going through the motions. Media is to blame in a big way, why else are people posing in photos with bottles of £30-60 bottles of vodka? Who aren't even getting that ****ed up? If you want a story buy a 70cl bottle for £11and have a night you won't remember.
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    Its just people's insecurities, and in some cases, superficial mindsets. When they hit mid twenties, they'll know what the crack is.
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    Complaining about it is just preaching to the choir, though. Best to ignore it and get on with your own life.
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    (Original post by Scott129)
    Completely agree with everything there. The worst are those people on Facebook who post statuses like "". Then when someone asks what's up, they either don't answer or say it doesn't matter. Pisses me right off. Blatant attention seeking

    Oh, I also know one girl who, when her football team got relegated from the Prem, she uploaded a photo of herself crying on to facebook :facepalm: She got ripped on it so bad and ended up deleting it hahaha.
    lol yep... just makes you wanna pull your own hair out
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    You can "unfreind" them on facebook but you can't completely avoid them in real life. Oh, if only...
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    (Original post by Philbert)
    You can "unfreind" them on facebook but you can't completely avoid them in real life. Oh, if only...
    That reminds me of the "Deqis" (Deletion then Encounter In Quick Succession) effect. Someone has been on your fb for over a year either annoying you with stupid posts or just plain acting like you don't exist, you eventually decide that you haven't seen this person for like over a year and are unlikely to ever see them again seeing as the moved to Australia so you delete them. Next week (or even day) you run into them at the local pub you never ever go to but stopped off that one time to pee, because they came back from Australia for a day for the first time in a year resulting in an ultra awkward moment when they say "let's talk on facbook later, I remember you are on my facebook contact list"
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    Eurrghhh I cannot stand people who draw attention to themselves, they really pee me off!.I am a very private person, and I think this reflects on my FB page.Not that it bothers me.I do have photos on there but I only use pose for one on a night out and the rest are taken when I'm dancing or talking to someone.I usually look battered on them but I dont care,I'm too busy enjoying myself and not posing for silly photos.
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    My current status inspired by this thread:

    <INSERT GENERIC DAYTIME ACTIVITY HERE>
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    (Original post by MancBoy)
    It seems a lot of young people these days are attention whores. Everyone is striving to be big city socialites. As the years go by more and more people are sucked in by this culture.

    I think media is partly to blame. With shows like Britains Got Talent, X-factor, TOWIE, Made In Chelsea etc. It makes everyone believe that they could be a celebrity. Celebrity status is so glamorized these days so everyone will do anything gain celebrity status and this is where attention whoring comes into play.

    People ave more of a platform these days to attention whore too. Facebook, Youtube, Twitter, blogs etc. I'm starting to think Facebook statuses are mainly to attention seek. There is not a day goes by where I don't see a status like 'Cant believe it!' or 'Why does this have to happen!'...statuses that beg for people to comment on it.

    It seems like these days if you don't have enough photos on your Facebook you are deemed unfit for this world. Everything everyone does seems like its only for Facebook . I was out one night and I saw a group of girls who were constantly taking pictures for 2 hours...and then went home. I mean come on people! Enjoy the moment rather than killing it posing for photos. No one cares if you went out 'with the girlies!' like the whole world gives a **** because you can guarantee every other ****er is doing the same. Its nothing new. Stop advertising your lives!

    I live in Manchester and there are a lot of young students that come over here from small towns/villages. These people are the worst when it comes to attention seeking. There is a lot of showing off talk. Usually in public places where there is a small audience in the surrounding area. You know the loud talking people do to make themselves look better. It's not even real conversations too its like everyone has to 'one-up' what ever the other person says. Its always something to do with gap years or what they've just bought or how drunk they got last night or if they got laid last night or what band they are listening to right now etc. Its like they want someone to go 'Really!! omg!!' but the reality is that no one ****ing cares.

    ...also when there is party there is always those people who want everyone else on the street to know they're having fun. Shouting and screaming as if they're the first people in the world to have a ****ing party. Having a house party doesn't automatically make you super cool. Everyone has parties. Get over it.

    Am I the only one who feels this way?
    Quite. It's just insecurity and a lack of class.
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    (Original post by MancBoy)
    It seems a lot of young people these days are attention whores. Everyone is striving to be big city socialites. As the years go by more and more people are sucked in by this culture.

    I think media is partly to blame. With shows like Britains Got Talent, X-factor, TOWIE, Made In Chelsea etc. It makes everyone believe that they could be a celebrity. Celebrity status is so glamorized these days so everyone will do anything gain celebrity status and this is where attention whoring comes into play.

    People ave more of a platform these days to attention whore too. Facebook, Youtube, Twitter, blogs etc. I'm starting to think Facebook statuses are mainly to attention seek. There is not a day goes by where I don't see a status like 'Cant believe it!' or 'Why does this have to happen!'...statuses that beg for people to comment on it.

    It seems like these days if you don't have enough photos on your Facebook you are deemed unfit for this world. Everything everyone does seems like its only for Facebook . I was out one night and I saw a group of girls who were constantly taking pictures for 2 hours...and then went home. I mean come on people! Enjoy the moment rather than killing it posing for photos. No one cares if you went out 'with the girlies!' like the whole world gives a **** because you can guarantee every other ****er is doing the same. Its nothing new. Stop advertising your lives!

    I live in Manchester and there are a lot of young students that come over here from small towns/villages. These people are the worst when it comes to attention seeking. There is a lot of showing off talk. Usually in public places where there is a small audience in the surrounding area. You know the loud talking people do to make themselves look better. It's not even real conversations too its like everyone has to 'one-up' what ever the other person says. Its always something to do with gap years or what they've just bought or how drunk they got last night or if they got laid last night or what band they are listening to right now etc. Its like they want someone to go 'Really!! omg!!' but the reality is that no one ****ing cares.

    ...also when there is party there is always those people who want everyone else on the street to know they're having fun. Shouting and screaming as if they're the first people in the world to have a ****ing party. Having a house party doesn't automatically make you super cool. Everyone has parties. Get over it.

    Am I the only one who feels this way?
    I totally agree, I have actually been thinking about this quite a lot recently.
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    yep. It's like people think that they already are celebrities, and therefore need to document every moment of their life as if they were and people cared. katy perry's picture of her salad: popular, your picture of your salad: no one gives a ****.

    basically, stop taking pictures of salad.
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    I have just seen a link to a page on the right hand side that said "which cambridge college gets the most sex" that person is deffo a virgin and deffo trying to make out he's a stud haha....definately a "look at me" person
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    So, so true. It's starting to get quite sad. At first, I thought it was a solely teenagers thing and I tried to keep away from it as much as possible, but only ended up becoming miserable because I was doing that, funnily enough. And I thought it'd become less of an issue by now... I'm 21 now and at uni, but I swear I still see it around me all the time.
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    Its not culture, people have always been like this. Everyone knows it isnt cool to act like this. People laugh at overly active facebookers.
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    (Original post by MancBoy)
    It seems a lot of young people these days are attention whores. Everyone is striving to be big city socialites. As the years go by more and more people are sucked in by this culture.

    I think media is partly to blame. With shows like Britains Got Talent, X-factor, TOWIE, Made In Chelsea etc. It makes everyone believe that they could be a celebrity. Celebrity status is so glamorized these days so everyone will do anything gain celebrity status and this is where attention whoring comes into play.

    People ave more of a platform these days to attention whore too. Facebook, Youtube, Twitter, blogs etc. I'm starting to think Facebook statuses are mainly to attention seek. There is not a day goes by where I don't see a status like 'Cant believe it!' or 'Why does this have to happen!'...statuses that beg for people to comment on it.

    It seems like these days if you don't have enough photos on your Facebook you are deemed unfit for this world. Everything everyone does seems like its only for Facebook . I was out one night and I saw a group of girls who were constantly taking pictures for 2 hours...and then went home. I mean come on people! Enjoy the moment rather than killing it posing for photos. No one cares if you went out 'with the girlies!' like the whole world gives a **** because you can guarantee every other ****er is doing the same. Its nothing new. Stop advertising your lives!

    I live in Manchester and there are a lot of young students that come over here from small towns/villages. These people are the worst when it comes to attention seeking. There is a lot of showing off talk. Usually in public places where there is a small audience in the surrounding area. You know the loud talking people do to make themselves look better. It's not even real conversations too its like everyone has to 'one-up' what ever the other person says. Its always something to do with gap years or what they've just bought or how drunk they got last night or if they got laid last night or what band they are listening to right now etc. Its like they want someone to go 'Really!! omg!!' but the reality is that no one ****ing cares.

    ...also when there is party there is always those people who want everyone else on the street to know they're having fun. Shouting and screaming as if they're the first people in the world to have a ****ing party. Having a house party doesn't automatically make you super cool. Everyone has parties. Get over it.

    Am I the only one who feels this way?
    We're a generation of narcissists man. This whole thing (whether it's been fully intentional or not) is set up to grow narcissists. People with oversized egos so concerned with what the world thinks of them that they become obsessed with appearance & status. People so in love with themselves they can't bear to be seen as anything less than perfect - and since they obviously can't ever be perfect it breeds insecurity, which in turn drives their behaviour & goals. The brainwashing starts in early childhood, the programming, the pressuring, the constant competing & comparison with their peers. That's what drives people to:

    a) spend money - the clothes, the hairstyle, the make-up, the jewellery, the teeth, the six-pack, the surgery
    b) become "successful" - to have the fancy job, the big house, the flash car, the money, the glamourous husband/wife/partner/whatever

    Society benefits massively from this. Society gets people willing to work hard their whole adult lives (in jobs most would rather not be doing given the choice!!) to spend big money on pandering to their vanity. It's all about wanting that admiration, wanting to avoid criticism. Think about how much of people's behaviour (both day-to-day and long-term) has its root in what the rest of the world thinks of them - it's almost all of it. Imagine how many markets would just collapse if people weren't paranoid about being judged. What we have is a system that brainwashes people on a massive scale to have insecurities, and then preys on those insecurities. This is really a sad situation, because how can these people be truly happy if their happiness & sense of self-worth is based in what the rest of the world thinks of them? The key to happiness is to not give a ****. Realising this improved my life significantly.

    What we get is self-important, attention seeking show-offs - aka. 95% of facebook. These days the main objective of people going on nights out seems to posting pictures of themselves going on nights out. I get where you're coming from completely.
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    (Original post by PinkyPurply)
    I was thinking this yesterday.

    Does anyone else feel that more and more people are dying to have something wrong with them? I'm sick of people announcing that they've been diagnosed with depression because they couldn't drag themselves into school.
    I have OCD, I don't announce it over Facebook, although it probably comes across. I do tend to express general angst about exams, which I honestly don't expect people to read or care about. Its just to get it off my chest rather than having it whiz around my head. I do tend to mention my OCD in person, because its often noticeable if I walk up stairs or some other activity in which my OCD rears its ugly head. There are too many embarrassing instances to mention. I have been asked several times 'do you have OCD or something?' and then I will say yes and explain it to them.

    I talk about it for several reasons.

    Firstly, there is a lot of stigma attached to it. I have had instances where I felt very alone in my OCD, especially when I didn't realize what it was. To make people aware of it makes me feel like I might help normalize it or help someone recognize it in themselves. A big part of OCD, and I assume other mental disorders, is that when you keep it private and inside your own head, it tends to intensify. To express it to people helps you see it in perspective. Reducing its power over you. I think although it may be jarring, it is part of the recovery process. Saying 'I have a compulsion with writing perfect lists to the point it gets in the way of me doing anything on the list' out loud in public is a very effective way of treating faulty cognition, because your internal logic has been over-ridden with compulsions. Its a powerful pattern interrupt. Being very open about it and having people know, explaining the symptoms to people helps prevent relapse. Also provides a support structure if you do go off the rails there is someone who can recognise your symptoms and tell you that you need to get help. Mental disorders can be insidious creatures.

    There is also a catharsis in recognizing your illness, admitting it to yourself, then telling other people. When you are ashamed of your mental disorder, it feeds in to the cycle of depression, or in my case; anxiety. Making the whole thing worse. Its also a relief not having to hide a big part of your life from others. I have been so ashamed and embarrassed of myself, feeling as if I am losing my mind, I wouldn't go out. When people know you are a bit nuts and don't seem to care, its like a massive weight has been lifted off your shoulders. Having said that, there are still some issues I have not recovered from that I have been to embarrassed to to admit to people outside my therapist and my mother. But I have made vast improvements and will continue to do so!


    I say all of this not only for the reasons I stated, but in relation to dismissing people's depression and posting it on facebook as 'attention seeking'. One in four people have mental health issues during their life time. One of the most common is depression. So in all likelihood they are experiencing problems. It is more common than dandruff. It may be a cry for help, when you are trapped in a mental disorder and the only way you can display your symptoms is the occasional outburst on facebook.

    A girl on facebook, who is much like the OP described, posted a status update along the lines of "Why is the world such a cruel place? So unjust and full of pain".
    ....I couldn't help myself and replied "Bad hair day?"
    Turns out one of her friends was hit by a car and died. Facebook was an outlet for her pain. Then all these posts below from other people stated 'RIP *insert name here*' under mine, and then ripped me a new *******. I really stuck my foot in it and felt crap about it.


    TL;DR : Moral of the story is, lots of people have mental problems. We deal with them in different ways. Symptoms you may think are silly, lazy or illogical can be a huge issue for other people. Its not just pure vanity. Saying people don't have mental disorders who claim to is often used as way to feel superior than others. Actually its pretty common in those who have suffered with a mental disorder and feel that their condition is worse than other peoples. Dismissing other people's problems in lieu of properly addressing your own. Or it could be due to just ignorance surrounding mental health, taking their own mental health for granted.


    p.s. *is a person who only has 100 friends of facebook and not very many FB photos*.

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