Attention seeking ('Look at me!') culture
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Original post by MancBoy
I live in Manchester and there are a lot of young students that come over here from small towns/villages. These people are the worst when it comes to attention seeking. There is a lot of showing off talk. Usually in public places where there is a small audience in the surrounding area. You know the loud talking people do to make themselves look better. It's not even real conversations too its like everyone has to 'one-up' what ever the other person says. Its always something to do with gap years or what they've just bought or how drunk they got last night or if they got laid last night or what band they are listening to right now etc. Its like they want someone to go 'Really!! omg!!' but the reality is that no one ****ing cares.
I live in Manchester and there are a lot of young students that come over here from small towns/villages. These people are the worst when it comes to attention seeking. There is a lot of showing off talk. Usually in public places where there is a small audience in the surrounding area. You know the loud talking people do to make themselves look better. It's not even real conversations too its like everyone has to 'one-up' what ever the other person says. Its always something to do with gap years or what they've just bought or how drunk they got last night or if they got laid last night or what band they are listening to right now etc. Its like they want someone to go 'Really!! omg!!' but the reality is that no one ****ing cares.
(1) You appear to be a bit of a snob (and possibly attention seeking) yourself - posing as a City Slicker and Super Cool Dude above all this.
(2) They sound like young students excited to have got into Manchester Uni (pretty cool for them - I would have been) and typically for young students, enjoying their first freedoms from school and parents, partying, being loud and having a good time.
(3) In headline news Facebook is a great big attention-fest. And now for more news from five years ago.
Yawn.
Original post by InspectorSophie
I have OCD, I don't announce it over Facebook, although it probably comes across. I do tend to express general angst about exams, which I honestly don't expect people to read or care about. Its just to get it off my chest rather than having it whiz around my head. I do tend to mention my OCD in person, because its often noticeable if I walk up stairs or some other activity in which my OCD rears its ugly head. There are too many embarrassing instances to mention. I have been asked several times 'do you have OCD or something?' and then I will say yes and explain it to them.
I talk about it for several reasons.
Firstly, there is a lot of stigma attached to it. I have had instances where I felt very alone in my OCD, especially when I didn't realize what it was. To make people aware of it makes me feel like I might help normalize it or help someone recognize it in themselves. A big part of OCD, and I assume other mental disorders, is that when you keep it private and inside your own head, it tends to intensify. To express it to people helps you see it in perspective. Reducing its power over you. I think although it may be jarring, it is part of the recovery process. Saying 'I have a compulsion with writing perfect lists to the point it gets in the way of me doing anything on the list' out loud in public is a very effective way of treating faulty cognition, because your internal logic has been over-ridden with compulsions. Its a powerful pattern interrupt. Being very open about it and having people know, explaining the symptoms to people helps prevent relapse. Also provides a support structure if you do go off the rails there is someone who can recognise your symptoms and tell you that you need to get help. Mental disorders can be insidious creatures.
There is also a catharsis in recognizing your illness, admitting it to yourself, then telling other people. When you are ashamed of your mental disorder, it feeds in to the cycle of depression, or in my case; anxiety. Making the whole thing worse. Its also a relief not having to hide a big part of your life from others. I have been so ashamed and embarrassed of myself, feeling as if I am losing my mind, I wouldn't go out. When people know you are a bit nuts and don't seem to care, its like a massive weight has been lifted off your shoulders. Having said that, there are still some issues I have not recovered from that I have been to embarrassed to to admit to people outside my therapist and my mother. But I have made vast improvements and will continue to do so!
I say all of this not only for the reasons I stated, but in relation to dismissing people's depression and posting it on facebook as 'attention seeking'. One in four people have mental health issues during their life time. One of the most common is depression. So in all likelihood they are experiencing problems. It is more common than dandruff. It may be a cry for help, when you are trapped in a mental disorder and the only way you can display your symptoms is the occasional outburst on facebook.
A girl on facebook, who is much like the OP described, posted a status update along the lines of "Why is the world such a cruel place? So unjust and full of pain".
....I couldn't help myself and replied "Bad hair day?"
Turns out one of her friends was hit by a car and died. Facebook was an outlet for her pain. Then all these posts below from other people stated 'RIP *insert name here*' under mine, and then ripped me a new *******. I really stuck my foot in it and felt crap about it.
TL;DR : Moral of the story is, lots of people have mental problems. We deal with them in different ways. Symptoms you may think are silly, lazy or illogical can be a huge issue for other people. Its not just pure vanity. Saying people don't have mental disorders who claim to is often used as way to feel superior than others. Actually its pretty common in those who have suffered with a mental disorder and feel that their condition is worse than other peoples. Dismissing other people's problems in lieu of properly addressing your own. Or it could be due to just ignorance surrounding mental health, taking their own mental health for granted.
p.s. *is a person who only has 100 friends of facebook and not very many FB photos*.
I talk about it for several reasons.
Firstly, there is a lot of stigma attached to it. I have had instances where I felt very alone in my OCD, especially when I didn't realize what it was. To make people aware of it makes me feel like I might help normalize it or help someone recognize it in themselves. A big part of OCD, and I assume other mental disorders, is that when you keep it private and inside your own head, it tends to intensify. To express it to people helps you see it in perspective. Reducing its power over you. I think although it may be jarring, it is part of the recovery process. Saying 'I have a compulsion with writing perfect lists to the point it gets in the way of me doing anything on the list' out loud in public is a very effective way of treating faulty cognition, because your internal logic has been over-ridden with compulsions. Its a powerful pattern interrupt. Being very open about it and having people know, explaining the symptoms to people helps prevent relapse. Also provides a support structure if you do go off the rails there is someone who can recognise your symptoms and tell you that you need to get help. Mental disorders can be insidious creatures.
There is also a catharsis in recognizing your illness, admitting it to yourself, then telling other people. When you are ashamed of your mental disorder, it feeds in to the cycle of depression, or in my case; anxiety. Making the whole thing worse. Its also a relief not having to hide a big part of your life from others. I have been so ashamed and embarrassed of myself, feeling as if I am losing my mind, I wouldn't go out. When people know you are a bit nuts and don't seem to care, its like a massive weight has been lifted off your shoulders. Having said that, there are still some issues I have not recovered from that I have been to embarrassed to to admit to people outside my therapist and my mother. But I have made vast improvements and will continue to do so!
I say all of this not only for the reasons I stated, but in relation to dismissing people's depression and posting it on facebook as 'attention seeking'. One in four people have mental health issues during their life time. One of the most common is depression. So in all likelihood they are experiencing problems. It is more common than dandruff. It may be a cry for help, when you are trapped in a mental disorder and the only way you can display your symptoms is the occasional outburst on facebook.
A girl on facebook, who is much like the OP described, posted a status update along the lines of "Why is the world such a cruel place? So unjust and full of pain".
....I couldn't help myself and replied "Bad hair day?"
Turns out one of her friends was hit by a car and died. Facebook was an outlet for her pain. Then all these posts below from other people stated 'RIP *insert name here*' under mine, and then ripped me a new *******. I really stuck my foot in it and felt crap about it.
TL;DR : Moral of the story is, lots of people have mental problems. We deal with them in different ways. Symptoms you may think are silly, lazy or illogical can be a huge issue for other people. Its not just pure vanity. Saying people don't have mental disorders who claim to is often used as way to feel superior than others. Actually its pretty common in those who have suffered with a mental disorder and feel that their condition is worse than other peoples. Dismissing other people's problems in lieu of properly addressing your own. Or it could be due to just ignorance surrounding mental health, taking their own mental health for granted.
p.s. *is a person who only has 100 friends of facebook and not very many FB photos*.
I understand people do have mental health issues and I'm glad you've found comfort in discussing it openly with others.
My point was, and I should have been clearer in my initial post; is that people are getting too quick to slap a label on a feeling.
Like most people on here I've had more times than I care to admit where my head has been in quite a place. I can swing from near hopelessness to burning rage. I get nervous about new things and new people, even talking to people behind counters. Sometimes I feel like this for minutes, sometimes weeks.
I don't tell anybody this (although I'm happy to spill about it on the Internet
) partly because I'm ashamed but mainly because they will label me as bi-polar or some other vapid sub section and forget about it. It's not manic depression or depression or any of the rest of it, it's just my age. I've obviously offended a lot of people in this thread and I really am sorry but I've been brought up to be no nonsense. I know that when I hit a mood or get a bit angry that I'll pull myself out of it, talking to people about it just gives them leverage above me and that can only make things worse. If for whatever reason I can't pull myself out of it then it's obviously meant to be. I don't want to be reliant on medication or someone dragging me through life. Get on with it, or get it over with.
Original post by Jono404
This thread has reminded me, has anyone else's news feed been clogged up with people sharing horrific photos of chemotherapy patients, deformed babies, war victims and the like with stupid messages like 'SHARE THIS IF SOMEONE YOU KNOW HAS HAD CANCER' or some ****, and they just feel the need to traumatise everyone for attention and to feel better about themselves by sharing it, no one wants to see that.
"I BET THAT NINE OUT OF TEN PEOPLE WON'T REPOST THIS"...every single ****ing time, so annoying
I couldn't agree more OP. We are literally surrounded by people like that, although a lot a people 'grow' out of it, a lot of people are still like it well into adulthood, or the rest of their lives if youre the wife of a rich man living in Orange County 
.
But anyway this thread reminds me, I was in the computer labs at uni the other day, 2 blondes with fake tans come strolling in with their caked up faces and over the top hand bags talking extremely loudly in their Essex accents so everyone could hear. I wanted to punch them.
Who wants to bet they have about 5,000 photo's on facebook too...
. But anyway this thread reminds me, I was in the computer labs at uni the other day, 2 blondes with fake tans come strolling in with their caked up faces and over the top hand bags talking extremely loudly in their Essex accents so everyone could hear. I wanted to punch them.
Who wants to bet they have about 5,000 photo's on facebook too...
(edited 11 years ago)
Original post by MancBoy
It seems a lot of young people these days are attention whores. Everyone is striving to be big city socialites. As the years go by more and more people are sucked in by this culture.
I think media is partly to blame. With shows like Britains Got Talent, X-factor, TOWIE, Made In Chelsea etc. It makes everyone believe that they could be a celebrity. Celebrity status is so glamorized these days so everyone will do anything gain celebrity status and this is where attention whoring comes into play.
People ave more of a platform these days to attention whore too. Facebook, Youtube, Twitter, blogs etc. I'm starting to think Facebook statuses are mainly to attention seek. There is not a day goes by where I don't see a status like 'Cant believe it!' or 'Why does this have to happen!'...statuses that beg for people to comment on it.
It seems like these days if you don't have enough photos on your Facebook you are deemed unfit for this world. Everything everyone does seems like its only for Facebook . I was out one night and I saw a group of girls who were constantly taking pictures for 2 hours...and then went home. I mean come on people! Enjoy the moment rather than killing it posing for photos. No one cares if you went out 'with the girlies!' like the whole world gives a **** because you can guarantee every other ****er is doing the same. Its nothing new. Stop advertising your lives!
I live in Manchester and there are a lot of young students that come over here from small towns/villages. These people are the worst when it comes to attention seeking. There is a lot of showing off talk. Usually in public places where there is a small audience in the surrounding area. You know the loud talking people do to make themselves look better. It's not even real conversations too its like everyone has to 'one-up' what ever the other person says. Its always something to do with gap years or what they've just bought or how drunk they got last night or if they got laid last night or what band they are listening to right now etc. Its like they want someone to go 'Really!! omg!!' but the reality is that no one ****ing cares.
...also when there is party there is always those people who want everyone else on the street to know they're having fun. Shouting and screaming as if they're the first people in the world to have a ****ing party. Having a house party doesn't automatically make you super cool. Everyone has parties. Get over it.
Am I the only one who feels this way?
I think media is partly to blame. With shows like Britains Got Talent, X-factor, TOWIE, Made In Chelsea etc. It makes everyone believe that they could be a celebrity. Celebrity status is so glamorized these days so everyone will do anything gain celebrity status and this is where attention whoring comes into play.
People ave more of a platform these days to attention whore too. Facebook, Youtube, Twitter, blogs etc. I'm starting to think Facebook statuses are mainly to attention seek. There is not a day goes by where I don't see a status like 'Cant believe it!' or 'Why does this have to happen!'...statuses that beg for people to comment on it.
It seems like these days if you don't have enough photos on your Facebook you are deemed unfit for this world. Everything everyone does seems like its only for Facebook . I was out one night and I saw a group of girls who were constantly taking pictures for 2 hours...and then went home. I mean come on people! Enjoy the moment rather than killing it posing for photos. No one cares if you went out 'with the girlies!' like the whole world gives a **** because you can guarantee every other ****er is doing the same. Its nothing new. Stop advertising your lives!
I live in Manchester and there are a lot of young students that come over here from small towns/villages. These people are the worst when it comes to attention seeking. There is a lot of showing off talk. Usually in public places where there is a small audience in the surrounding area. You know the loud talking people do to make themselves look better. It's not even real conversations too its like everyone has to 'one-up' what ever the other person says. Its always something to do with gap years or what they've just bought or how drunk they got last night or if they got laid last night or what band they are listening to right now etc. Its like they want someone to go 'Really!! omg!!' but the reality is that no one ****ing cares.
...also when there is party there is always those people who want everyone else on the street to know they're having fun. Shouting and screaming as if they're the first people in the world to have a ****ing party. Having a house party doesn't automatically make you super cool. Everyone has parties. Get over it.
Am I the only one who feels this way?
so glad others on the same page as I..
Original post by MancBoy
It seems a lot of young people these days are attention whores. Everyone is striving to be big city socialites. As the years go by more and more people are sucked in by this culture.
I think media is partly to blame. With shows like Britains Got Talent, X-factor, TOWIE, Made In Chelsea etc. It makes everyone believe that they could be a celebrity. Celebrity status is so glamorized these days so everyone will do anything gain celebrity status and this is where attention whoring comes into play.
People ave more of a platform these days to attention whore too. Facebook, Youtube, Twitter, blogs etc. I'm starting to think Facebook statuses are mainly to attention seek. There is not a day goes by where I don't see a status like 'Cant believe it!' or 'Why does this have to happen!'...statuses that beg for people to comment on it.
It seems like these days if you don't have enough photos on your Facebook you are deemed unfit for this world. Everything everyone does seems like its only for Facebook . I was out one night and I saw a group of girls who were constantly taking pictures for 2 hours...and then went home. I mean come on people! Enjoy the moment rather than killing it posing for photos. No one cares if you went out 'with the girlies!' like the whole world gives a **** because you can guarantee every other ****er is doing the same. Its nothing new. Stop advertising your lives!
I live in Manchester and there are a lot of young students that come over here from small towns/villages. These people are the worst when it comes to attention seeking. There is a lot of showing off talk. Usually in public places where there is a small audience in the surrounding area. You know the loud talking people do to make themselves look better. It's not even real conversations too its like everyone has to 'one-up' what ever the other person says. Its always something to do with gap years or what they've just bought or how drunk they got last night or if they got laid last night or what band they are listening to right now etc. Its like they want someone to go 'Really!! omg!!' but the reality is that no one ****ing cares.
...also when there is party there is always those people who want everyone else on the street to know they're having fun. Shouting and screaming as if they're the first people in the world to have a ****ing party. Having a house party doesn't automatically make you super cool. Everyone has parties. Get over it.
Am I the only one who feels this way?
I think media is partly to blame. With shows like Britains Got Talent, X-factor, TOWIE, Made In Chelsea etc. It makes everyone believe that they could be a celebrity. Celebrity status is so glamorized these days so everyone will do anything gain celebrity status and this is where attention whoring comes into play.
People ave more of a platform these days to attention whore too. Facebook, Youtube, Twitter, blogs etc. I'm starting to think Facebook statuses are mainly to attention seek. There is not a day goes by where I don't see a status like 'Cant believe it!' or 'Why does this have to happen!'...statuses that beg for people to comment on it.
It seems like these days if you don't have enough photos on your Facebook you are deemed unfit for this world. Everything everyone does seems like its only for Facebook . I was out one night and I saw a group of girls who were constantly taking pictures for 2 hours...and then went home. I mean come on people! Enjoy the moment rather than killing it posing for photos. No one cares if you went out 'with the girlies!' like the whole world gives a **** because you can guarantee every other ****er is doing the same. Its nothing new. Stop advertising your lives!
I live in Manchester and there are a lot of young students that come over here from small towns/villages. These people are the worst when it comes to attention seeking. There is a lot of showing off talk. Usually in public places where there is a small audience in the surrounding area. You know the loud talking people do to make themselves look better. It's not even real conversations too its like everyone has to 'one-up' what ever the other person says. Its always something to do with gap years or what they've just bought or how drunk they got last night or if they got laid last night or what band they are listening to right now etc. Its like they want someone to go 'Really!! omg!!' but the reality is that no one ****ing cares.
...also when there is party there is always those people who want everyone else on the street to know they're having fun. Shouting and screaming as if they're the first people in the world to have a ****ing party. Having a house party doesn't automatically make you super cool. Everyone has parties. Get over it.
Am I the only one who feels this way?
I've never had a house party
But OP, I agree completely. Especially the part about girls going out purely so they can take pictures and upload them to facebook. Get a ****ing life honestly. Instead of trying to make everyone believe you've been out having fun, why not actually go out and have fun
for any slightly older TSRers in their early 20s....people posting constantly about their kids and pretty much nothing else, when they had a ****, little Tyler has just used his potty, endless pics of babies who look exactly the same in each, also people who have scan pictures and pictures of their kids as their profile picture...
Now I love kids and am interested in the odd picture and interesting information but far too many think everyone else is interested in every move their child makes...most likely because they have a boring life sat at home all day and have nothing else to do.
Now I love kids and am interested in the odd picture and interesting information but far too many think everyone else is interested in every move their child makes...most likely because they have a boring life sat at home all day and have nothing else to do.
Original post by badcheesecrispy
for any slightly older TSRers in their early 20s....people posting constantly about their kids and pretty much nothing else, when they had a ****, little Tyler has just used his potty, endless pics of babies who look exactly the same in each, also people who have scan pictures and pictures of their kids as their profile picture...
Now I love kids and am interested in the odd picture and interesting information but far too many think everyone else is interested in every move their child makes...most likely because they have a boring life sat at home all day and have nothing else to do.
Now I love kids and am interested in the odd picture and interesting information but far too many think everyone else is interested in every move their child makes...most likely because they have a boring life sat at home all day and have nothing else to do.
Oh God this winds me up a treat! I don't care if their child has just snored or made a funny sound
And I certainly don't need to read "I love my baby boy ___ so much", "my child is the best thing that ever happened to me" every 20 mins or so, I do not ****ing care. Why do they feel the need to rub everyone's nose in it? Do they think they have something to prove?Original post by sarahthegemini
Oh God this winds me up a treat! I don't care if their child has just snored or made a funny sound And I certainly don't need to read "I love my baby boy ___ so much", "my child is the best thing that ever happened to me" every 20 mins or so, I do not ****ing care. Why do they feel the need to rub everyone's nose in it? Do they think they have something to prove?
And I certainly don't need to read "I love my baby boy ___ so much", "my child is the best thing that ever happened to me" every 20 mins or so, I do not ****ing care. Why do they feel the need to rub everyone's nose in it? Do they think they have something to prove?I have a child myself and find it absurd and really annoying, we know you love your kids it would be more interesting if you said you didnt!!
You'd think they were the first or only person in the world to have a child, its the most normal and natural thing in the world, no one gives two ****s.
Original post by Dr.Pwepper
Lol, I hate those messages where a girl would say... "Argh, men/boys are all the same. I'm going to become a lesbian."
*1 week later*
______ is now in a relationship with Steven.
*1 week later*
______ is now in a relationship with Steven.
I know, like they thing being a lesbian would somehow be easier. They're just all so hypocritical, bitching about stuff other people do even though they're just as bad.
Original post by badcheesecrispy
for any slightly older TSRers in their early 20s....people posting constantly about their kids and pretty much nothing else, when they had a ****,
A relative of mine actually posted this. My first thought was "did we really need to know that?". Whereas friends with children do tend to post slightly more interesting stuff. Or don't mention their children at all.
Most people tend to be in this very pitifully deluded state where they believe that being cool means 'keeping up with everything' and unfortunately, 'everything' is mainly crap abt celebrities and stuff like that nowadays. Keep up with whatever's in-facebook? put up a gazillion photos.have a gazillion friends. Im cool. Lady Gaga? know all her songs. be ready to have full-fledged comments prepared for whatever comes up about her. Im cool. And when most people start doing it, it just becomes more and more as everyone wants to beat everyone else in this 'im cool' race.
And all this points to only one thing-peer pressure and an extremely fogged up purpose of life. We seem to have forgotten how we actually have great and important things to do in our lives.The value of our lives is being eaten up ignorantly.
And all this points to only one thing-peer pressure and an extremely fogged up purpose of life. We seem to have forgotten how we actually have great and important things to do in our lives.The value of our lives is being eaten up ignorantly.
TSR is a prime example of attention whorery (is that even a word?). In the universities and study sections, probably 60-65% of people claiming they got straight A*s at GCSEs are lying through their teeth. My claim is probably unfounded but it seems strange that such a large number of such academically talented people would all show up at the same place at once...
This was posted from The Student Room's iPhone/iPad App
This was posted from The Student Room's iPhone/iPad App
Original post by Scott129
Completely agree with everything there. The worst are those people on Facebook who post statuses like "". Then when someone asks what's up, they either don't answer or say it doesn't matter. Pisses me right off. Blatant attention seeking
Oh, I also know one girl who, when her football team got relegated from the Prem, she uploaded a photo of herself crying on to facebook
She got ripped on it so bad and ended up deleting it hahaha.
". Then when someone asks what's up, they either don't answer or say it doesn't matter. Pisses me right off. Blatant attention seeking Oh, I also know one girl who, when her football team got relegated from the Prem, she uploaded a photo of herself crying on to facebook
She got ripped on it so bad and ended up deleting it hahaha.Original post by Jono404
This thread has reminded me, has anyone else's news feed been clogged up with people sharing horrific photos of chemotherapy patients, deformed babies, war victims and the like with stupid messages like 'SHARE THIS IF SOMEONE YOU KNOW HAS HAD CANCER' or some ****, and they just feel the need to traumatise everyone for attention and to feel better about themselves by sharing it, no one wants to see that.
I think people just do that to get likes on facebook which is pretty ****ing sad, and as a result I never like or share those pictures purely because its always spouted by someone who thinks they're self-righteous enough to know better than anyone yet really just wants to feel loved by the amount of thumbs up they get.
Original post by Mortson
TSR is a prime example of attention whorery (is that even a word?). In the universities and study sections, probably 60-65% of people claiming they got straight A*s at GCSEs are lying through their teeth. My claim is probably unfounded but it seems strange that such a large number of such academically talented people would all show up at the same place at once...
This was posted from The Student Room's iPhone/iPad App
This was posted from The Student Room's iPhone/iPad App
LOL, grade inflation on TSR as well?!
I wish OP would stop talking about himself anyway, we all want to talk about ourselves.
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