(Original post by The_Jammy_Witch)
Was about to slice into the first paragraph before I read your second...
Yeah OP, it's important to not be bitter towards people just because, secretly, you wish you could be more like them - outward about things, fun, foot loose and fancy free, confident, a little bit wild and overall ALIVE.
The problem with bitterness is that everyone can pick up on it on a very subliminal level. That is where I think your problem lies.
People don't do drinking/clubbing/FB/all the things you're frustrated about solely because they're told to (I used to feel like that was the case, and guess what? That attitude got me nowhere with people). Sure, there's an element of that going on, but how about this: they do it because it's FUN. It's fun to go out and have a bit to drink and dance and laugh and play! What's life without fun, yeah?
And of course not everybody derives fun from the same things, and I'm not trying to define it for you... but just as you wouldn't like it if I DID tell you that basically, if you don't like clubbing then you're boring... they don't like it that you think they must be hedonistic knobs just because they live their life unapologetically.
Don't reckon they know you think that? Think again. As I say, we're very good at sizing someone up instinctively, and I ask you this: if you DID have your own crowd and your own thing going on; if you did have your own way of having fun and girls and fun etc - would you feel so bitter about them and what they're doing? No, of course you wouldn't. Ipso facto, this isn't about them. It's about you and your issues.
Yes it is possible for anyone to have genuine friends, but let's face it, if you're not fun to be around - if you're all twisted with resentment about the Way Things Are - ain't nobody gonna wanna be your friend. So, open up. Stop hatin' on those who like to live in the moment, and maybe even consider joining them! Come on, what's the harm? You're young, you're free, you're at uni - live it up a little! Instead of focusing on how WRONG it all is and how ANIMALISTIC other lads are, why don't you focus on doing the things that make you happy and f*** what anyone else thinks? Stop being in such internal conflict with yourself, between what you think you should want - what is 'proper' - and what you ACTUALLY want, which I reckon, is to be a bit of a young buck yourself and BE one of the 'cool' guys that you're so envious of.
Everyday the universe gives you a clean slate upon which to redesign yourself. Just because you've always held certain priorities and self-limiting 'values' doesn't mean that it always has to be the case. Look, if your life ain't turning out how you'd like it to be in some respects then you must own it and take responsibility for that fact. It's your poo. Not their poo. Your poo, and your call, and your choice.
Watch Yes Man.