The Types of People You Meet in a Lecture
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The Types of People You Meet in a LectureSo the lecture. A way of a wise experienced professional in his field disseminating education to a bunch of eager young scholars. Or so it's supposed to be. The lecture is an experience common to all, whether at 9am pissed off your head or at 5pm when everyone, including the lecturer, is ready to bomb off home to tea. Through my time at university I've often found specific types of people in my lectures. Here are a few of them
1)The Note Taker
So the lecture is roughly 20 minutes in. You're casually plugging away, making notes or annotating the lecture handouts with additional information, when you catch a glimpse of a person to your side. Their wrist is a blur because of the speed of their pen or they are tapping on their computer so hard you can't ignore them. You see huge swathes of notes, scribbled in the margins at a consistent pace. You feel insignificant and puny in comparison. They're going through sheets of paper like a fat man goes through toilet paper after a late night vindaloo.
Even when the lecturer makes a joke about the weather, or the football, they still keep writing. I don't understand it. Maybe they know something we don't.
2) The gossip
So you're trying to keep up with the lecture but the couple next to you have other ideas. Instead often at pretty much shouting volume, you hear everything there is to know - their love lives, their plans, their careers what they want to do with their lives, and - more often than not - how this lecture is a waste of time. Well I was enjoying it until you started blabbing on in my ear! The gossip always talks. They never take notes. I always wonder why they just don't go to a cafe but I suppose they are trying to absorb education through some sort of osmotic effect
3) The scrounger
Why would you go to a lecture without a pen? Or paper? Yet the scrounger does so every time. Around 10 minutes into the lecture you'll get a tap and 'hey dude can I borrow something'. Now I have all my pens out next to my sheets so I can't exactly say no but this happens every time. And sometimes they don't even give the stuff back.
4) Facebooker
This person will be on their laptop for the whole time on fb chat or on twitter or on something that is not educationally related. I've seen people do an hour's worth of shopping on ASOS. Again one has to ask why, as it's not as if there's a dearth of other opportunities in a student's day to go on Facebook.
5)The drunk
This person will rock up to the lecture (usually but not exclusively early morning) and sit at the back, often nodding off to sleep. They will invariably stink of alcohol, cigarettes, early morning kebabs, shame and regret. Occasionally they will turn to you and reaffirm their drunkeness, so everyone knows it's OK. Good for a laugh.
6) The 'funny one'
Everyone thinks they're a comedian and this person is no exception. When a lecturer finishes saying something he'll chime in with his own views. The most egregrious example was trying to learn about Romanticism in conjunction with eighteenth century history. This was General Election Time in 2010 and the annoying sod kept chiming in 'bet Cameron would have fitted in' or 'Thatcher would have loved him' as if he was Ben Elton updated for the 21st century. We gave polite smiles, the British equivalent of 'I hate you please go away' but he didn't.
7) The Sycophant.
This person loves the lecturer. He will laugh at every bad joke, or unintended joke, clap at certain points. When it's finished he's the first to go straight down there not to ask questions like anyone else but to talk as if Prof. SoandSo is his own personal chum. It's horrific.
8) The early leaver
We always had one of these surprisingly. This chap would always leave 20 minutes early. We couldn't understand it. With 20 minutes to go and a lot of points not covered he would stand up and saunter out the door. Once the lecturer just stopped everything and watched him slowly leave. The converse of this is the late arrival, someone who is always late, never mind if they had nothing else on that day they will still rock up, half-eaten bagel in one hand, lecture notes frantically thumbed in the other.
9)The Couple
There are many places to document your affection for your partner - a club for example or the privacy of your own home. not a lecture theatre. However some couples still do it. Do you know how hard it is to take notes on twelfth century historiography when the couple next to you are trying to do their best 'pogo stick stuck in mud impression' and all you want to do is stab them in the eye. Very hard.
10) The normal person
The rarest species of all but the most valued. Here's to you, normal student who takes notes but not too many, listens to the lecturer but is ready to get the hell out of there when need be. You give me hope -
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Re: The Types of People You Meet in a LectureHonestly, so what? I'm sure most things that have been posted on here existed somewhere else beforehand.(Original post by james1211)
Really, i've seen this exact list many many times around the web. At least it isnt a copy paste
I hadn't seen it before, and I'm sure I'm not the only one. You may not enjoy it, but the rest of us did
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Re: The Types of People You Meet in a LectureLol you forgot the Monologue person. Person interupts a lecture and tells a life story where, at best, only half of it is relevant to the topic being taught. Never heard of anyone clapping at a lecturer though haha
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Re: The Types of People You Meet in a LectureThere's plenty of these types in my lectures.(Original post by Aeschylus)
4) Facebooker
This person will be on their laptop for the whole time on fb chat or on twitter or on something that is not educationally related. I've seen people do an hour's worth of shopping on ASOS. Again one has to ask why, as it's not as if there's a dearth of other opportunities in a student's day to go on Facebook.
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Re: The Types of People You Meet in a LectureWe have a group in my English Lectures that sit at the front of every lecture and call themselves "The Squad". They don't hang out with people who aren't in their group, they don't acknowledge you if you say hello, and they say that everyone hates them because they're so individual. It's like the "Reverse Plastics". For real. They all insist on being larger (and louder) than life so everytime someone tells a joke the whole lecture theatre hears just how funny it was. They wear the most ridiculous outfits and worship this girl called Leah who grew up in a circus and likes to wear horse-head helmet things to lectures.
I would call these people The Attention-Seekers. Or the Freak Shows. They have a tendency to lament how persecuted they are simply for being themselves (they delude themselves into believing it's because they're OhSoDifferent as opposed to OhSo****ingAnnoying and they would probably prefer the second title because it shows how the world is against them but they don't care...
Rant over.
Actually, one more addition: The farter. These people come last and sit in front of you and make you want to cry. -
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Re: The Types of People You Meet in a Lecturelol, cant believe u still get this at uni(Original post by willbee)
We have a group in my English Lectures that sit at the front of every lecture and call themselves "The Squad". They don't hang out with people who aren't in their group, they don't acknowledge you if you say hello, and they say that everyone hates them because they're so individual. It's like the "Reverse Plastics". For real. They all insist on being larger (and louder) than life so everytime someone tells a joke the whole lecture theatre hears just how funny it was. They wear the most ridiculous outfits and worship this girl called Leah who grew up in a circus and likes to wear horse-head helmet things to lectures.
I would call these people The Attention-Seekers. Or the Freak Shows. They have a tendency to lament how persecuted they are simply for being themselves (they delude themselves into believing it's because they're OhSoDifferent as opposed to OhSo****ingAnnoying and they would probably prefer the second title because it shows how the world is against them but they don't care... -
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Re: The Types of People You Meet in a LectureI guess it's similar the 'gossips' but we always have this group of guys in our lectures who sit at the back and just snigger and talk the whole way through the lectures. Like they're in a year 11 math class! I don't understand how people like that are even on the third year of a pretty tough degree.
Ugh and there was one guy on my course who had really bad achne, which i'm not making fun off, i don't have flawless skin either. But during lectures he would always ALWAYS sit there scratching the sores on the back of his neck and squeezing puss out of his spots, occasionally pausing to put his fingers in his mouth (I DON'T KNOW WHY!). He always sat near the front as well, so if he sat in front of you then you'd spend the next 50 minutes distracted from the lecturer by the horror of it.
Sorry if i'm oversharing and grossed you out with that but you didn't have to sit behind it for 2 years! You weren't there man! You don't even know! -
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Re: The Types of People You Meet in a LectureJust...no...words...(Original post by Anna150)
Ugh and there was one guy on my course who had really bad achne, which i'm not making fun off, i don't have flawless skin either. But during lectures he would always ALWAYS sit there scratching the sores on the back of his neck and squeezing puss out of his spots, occasionally pausing to put his fingers in his mouth (I DON'T KNOW WHY!). He always sat near the front as well, so if he sat in front of you then you'd spend the next 50 minutes distracted from the lecturer by the horror of it.
Sorry if i'm oversharing and grossed you out with that but you didn't have to sit behind it for 2 years! You weren't there man! You don't even know! -
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Re: The Types of People You Meet in a Lecture(Original post by willbee)
We have a group in my English Lectures that sit at the front of every lecture and call themselves "The Squad". They don't hang out with people who aren't in their group, they don't acknowledge you if you say hello, and they say that everyone hates them because they're so individual. It's like the "Reverse Plastics". For real. They all insist on being larger (and louder) than life so everytime someone tells a joke the whole lecture theatre hears just how funny it was. They wear the most ridiculous outfits and worship this girl called Leah who grew up in a circus and likes to wear horse-head helmet things to lectures.
I would call these people The Attention-Seekers. Or the Freak Shows. They have a tendency to lament how persecuted they are simply for being themselves (they delude themselves into believing it's because they're OhSoDifferent as opposed to OhSo****ingAnnoying and they would probably prefer the second title because it shows how the world is against them but they don't care...
Rant over.
Actually, one more addition: The farter. These people come last and sit in front of you and make you want to cry.
"Freak Shows"
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