What have I done? Sleeping with ex

    #1

    So we are both 18 and we were still great friends after breaking up a few weeks ago.

    Before we broke up we booked this day out to London and so we thought oh it'd be a shame to waste it and we are still both friendly so we kinda just went along with it and met up and went.

    Cut a long story short we both got on really well and had a great day and ended up kissing and then one thing led to another and we slept together.


    I feel so dirty and bad, not that either of us has moved on or done anytihng since (we are both pretty reserved people) but I don't know, I feel wrong or something for sleeping with her. I am literally out of luck with my friends (who for whatever reason just seem to have abandoned me recently ) and then my ex was my kinda only other option in what at the minute, for me, is a crap life. I kinda felt sorry for myself and I know I shouldn't have done that, but I have now and it just feels so wrong.

    Should I or am I just being silly?

    Rep:
    I ended up sleeping with my ex after my last break-up. It happened twice, and each time I felt like it was a huge mistake afterwards!

    If you have no intention of getting back together, then it's not a good idea. It just messes with your feelings and makes it more difficult to move on. Don't beat yourself up over it, but take care not let anyone get hurt.

    Rep:
    Worse things happen at sea

    Rep:
    Until you said 'she', I assumed YOU were the girl.

    Um, you got sex. What are you complaining about? Stop feeling guilty to exist and enjoy.

    Rep:
    I think alot of people have stupidly ended back up with an ex when they arnt over them, you need to realise you are over having sex only makes you feel stronger about them it doesnt do anything for getting over anybody

    Rep:
    Neither of you are seeing other people, you still get on well and presuming you're still not pining over her/hoping to get back together, then I don't see why you've got much to feel bad about.

    Rep:
    I've done the same thing (for a protracted period, in fact) and it's not bad, it's just a bit stupid and makes things more difficult and confusing. Is some more sex worth putting yourselves through that? It depends. In my case it really wasn't.

    Rep:
    Did you sleep well?

    Rep:
    hey hey men, do not worry,
    here in russia we always do this, sometimes it is bad as they catch disease but most time, no problem my friend.

    Rep:
    Ah. Never a good idea. In my experience sleeping with an ex just strengthens feelings and makes it wayyyyyy harder to move on.

    Rep:
    (Original post by The_Jammy_Witch)
    Until you said 'she', I assumed YOU were the girl.

    Um, you got sex. What are you complaining about? Stop feeling guilty to exist and enjoy.
    Yeah because guys feel absolutely no emotion towards sex and think of it as a conquest that should be completed no matter what the circumstance. Whereas girls are only there for the guy to chase. You sound like a ****.

    Rep:
    Don't beat yourself up about it. It's happened. It's about getting to know what your limitations are.

    Rep:
    (Original post by Tedaus)
    Yeah because guys feel absolutely no emotion towards sex and think of it as a conquest that should be completed no matter what the circumstance. Whereas girls are only there for the guy to chase. You sound like a ****.
    And you sound like someone who recontextalises other people's posts to cater to your own issues. Good luck! :cool:

    Rep:
    It happens to the best of us, don't let it happen again as it can make things very difficult in terms of moving on.

    Rep:
    (Original post by The_Jammy_Witch)
    And you sound like someone who recontextalises other people's posts to cater to your own issues. Good luck! :cool:
    You assumed it was a girl then when you found out it was a guy you said "Um, you got sex. What are you complaining about?" as though guys should be thrilled whenever they get to have sex no matter what the circumstance, whereas a girl would worry about the emotional side of it. Clearly the OP disproves that.

    Rep:
    (Original post by Tedaus)
    You assumed it was a girl then when you found out it was a guy you said "Um, you got sex. What are you complaining about?" as though guys should be thrilled whenever they get to have sex no matter what the circumstance, whereas a girl would worry about the emotional side of it. Clearly the OP disproves that.
    Against my heternormative views (which, by the way, I'm entitled to share with the OP as much as you are yours), yes he does. I bet he listens to Westlife too. :P

    Couldn't see much of a 'dilemma' in anything that he wrote, and still don't. They get on well etc, they had sex. What seems to be the problem? Yes, I would, all else being equal, assume that a girl would be more likely to arbitrarily create an emotional 'issue' out of not much. This isn't so much me being somehow sexist as it is me accepting that boys and girls process sex differently.

    You saw what you wanted to see of my post, and stretched the implications too far. OP oughta stop feeling guilty for nothing, accept that if the girl didn't want it she wouldn't've let it happen, and just get on with it. There are worse things for cryin' out loud. Next you'll be having a period in the name of gender equality.

    I'm not coming back on this thread to justify myself to you again, young whipper snapper bobby boy ladling johnny joe.

    EDIT: Oh, alright, I see your point and how you constred it that way. But it's not how I meant it and would write it differently now. THERE I SAID IT

Reply

Submit reply

Register

Thanks for posting! You just need to create an account in order to submit the post
  1. this can't be left blank
    that username has been taken, please choose another Forgotten your password?

    this is what you'll be called on TSR

  2. this can't be left blank
    this email is already registered. Forgotten your password?

    never shared and never spammed

  3. this can't be left blank

    6 characters or longer with both numbers and letters is safer

  4. this can't be left empty
    your full birthday is required
  1. By joining you agree to our Ts and Cs, privacy policy and site rules

  2. Slide the button to the right to create your account

    Slide to join now Processing…

: May 27, 2012

Which unis are the poshest?

See what students perceive to be the classiest establishments in Britain

Reputation gems:
You get these gems as you gain rep from other members for making good contributions and giving helpful advice.