[Tedaus]

Before disregarding the title and posting "yes of course they do", think about it; in nature, it's always the males competing with eachother to get the female, who seems passive to whoever proves themselves the most.

It seems that humans are the only animals that don't do that and it could actually be the other way round. Basically I'm asking, is society what makes women subconsciously think they are attracted to men, despite there being no biological proof or reason for it?

I don't actually think they aren't, this thread was based on a status somebody on my friend's list posted and it got me thinking. What do you think?

[pr0view]

I don't think they are as physically attracted to men as men are to women. I think they put more emphasis on personality, and it just happens to be by a huge coincidence that rich men always have better personalities.

[Mushrooms]

I think men do compete for women in society. They try to impress the woman through their bravely, intelligence or whatever. The same with women as they try to attract men with their beauty. I will say that men are more attracted to women through personal appearance (yes I understand that is a generalisation and is not the same for everyone), and women are attracted to men through their personality (again a generalisation). However there are always those who are shallow and marry men or women based on their money.

[Wilfred Little]

(Original post by pr0view)
I don't think they are as physically attracted to men as men are to women. I think they put more emphasis on personality, and it just happens to be by a huge coincidence that rich men always have better personalities.

[Guybrush Sheepgood]

(Original post by Tedaus)
Before disregarding the title and posting "yes of course they do", think about it; in nature, it's always the males competing with eachother to get the female, who seems passive to whoever proves themselves the most.

It seems that humans are the only animals that don't do that and it could actually be the other way round. Basically I'm asking, is society what makes women subconsciously think they are attracted to men, despite there being no biological proof or reason for it?

I don't actually think they aren't, this thread was based on a status somebody on my friend's list posted and it got me thinking. What do you think?

That they shouldn't become an evolutionary biologist. Or do any biological sciences. I honestly don't know how anyone could possibly have come up with such a ridiculous conclusion. Yes, of course females are attracted to males.

[Tedaus]

(Original post by Guybrush Sheepgood)
That they shouldn't become an evolutionary biologist. Or do any biological sciences. I honestly don't know how anyone could possibly have come up with such a ridiculous conclusion. Yes, of course females are attracted to males.

It was just a question. I actually said I thought they were. Did you read the thread or just the question you bolded?

[DontGetMeVex]

When I saw the title I did think 'ahh what an idiot ofcourse we are' but now I've read it I do understand where you're comin from.
I'm only one woman so I can't speak for everyone but when I see someone really attractive or gain feelings for someone I know I do get this sort of urge for them to be mine, it's weird I'm probably not makin sense, and if say I see them talkin to other girls on bbm/Facebook/twitter I feel this kind of competitive feelin like he's the prize and I need to get rid of those other girls.
Must be some kind of animal instinct
Sorry if I've come across as some absolute maniac or whatever loool!


This was posted from The Student Room's iPhone

[Whatever9999]

Yes handsome guys do attract me ,but i usually wait for them to talk ,if they have a horrible personality then its a huge turn off for me no matter how good they look !!

[Chumbaniya]

I can kind of understand why he came to that conclusion, but only if he reached it entirely through reflection without ever interacting socially with an adult woman. Yes, women are attracted to men. You can discover this by talking to a woman. It's actually quite easy to do - it's an experiment that I have conducted on multiple occasions.

[Tedaus]

He also brought up how women have "types" whereas men generally don't (obviously not always the case, but generally). Maybe women see men in "types" to decide who is the best 'type' of man for them, and it's not normally based on looks. In fact a woman could find a man 'attractive' (in the sense that they would because of societal rules, as opposed to biology), but not wish to go out with them because they're not her "type".

I'm just playing Devil's advocate here, I actually think women do find men attractive. Even in nature, the male peacock opens its wings to attract a mate and the female goes for the one who has the most attractive pattern.

[Mcnubn]

(Original post by pr0view)
it just happens to be by a huge coincidence that rich men always have better personalities.

assuming you ignore the douche's

[laura130490]

I'm definitely attracted to men, but I don't think it's the same kind of way as men are attracted to women. To me, personality is a huge part of the attraction, if I don't like them as a person then I don't find them attractive. They could be the most gorgeous guy in the world, but if they weren't a nice person I wouldn't fancy them.

[pinkangelgirl]

im a woman and im attracted to men as i will ALWAYS be perving on some sort of male specimen.

[Anonymous]

What do women actually find attractive in men? I've tried talking to a few girls and all they seem to care about is money or somebody who can boost their ego. It's not like they enjoy sex is it? If you're normal with them they just treat you like crap.
Help me out here I'm really struggling with loneliness.

[pinkangelgirl]

(Original post by Anonymous)
What do women actually find attractive in men? I've tried talking to a few girls and all they seem to care about is money or somebody who can boost their ego. It's not like they enjoy sex is it? If you're normal with them they just treat you like crap.
Help me out here I'm really struggling with loneliness.

i love mens body shapes, faces, hair, their voices.

I have a ridiculous thing for a mans smell- even just his natural smell......in fact the other day i was on the bus and this guy had the most awesome pheromones EVER and i was just like mmmmmmmmmm, it was heaven!

And in terms of personality i dont really know, as its been a long time since i had any sort of male company as i dont have many male friends at uni probs cos im too pervy

[Josh93]

(Original post by Anonymous)
What do women actually find attractive in men? I've tried talking to a few girls and all they seem to care about is money or somebody who can boost their ego. It's not like they enjoy sex is it? If you're normal with them they just treat you like crap.
Help me out here I'm really struggling with loneliness.

'It's not like they enjoy sex'?!?!
I'm assuming that you have never interacted socially (certainly not sexually) with an adult woman?

I'm also assuming that your understanding of basic anatomy excludes the primary function of the clitoris?

Edit: If you're struggling with loneliness then being all jaded and bitchy towards women in general is probably not going to be the best solution to your problem....

[Anonymous]

(Original post by Josh93)
'It's not like they enjoy sex'?!?!
I'm assuming that you have never interacted socially (certainly not sexually) with an adult woman?

I'm also assuming that your understanding of basic anatomy excludes the primary function of the clitoris?

Edit: If you're struggling with loneliness then being all jaded and bitchy towards women in general is probably not going to be the best solution to your problem....

Well it depends on what you mean by that. I've spoken to girl in my uni (not sure if they count as "adult women". Obviously i've never had sex. I've kissed a few girls in clubs and danced with them but that's about it.

Yes i know women get off by having their clits rubbed and whatnot..

I'm not jaded or bitchy towards women at all (well maybe slightly) but most of the time i dont really pay them much attention because it's not like they're gonna like me anyway is it?

What do you suggest i do then pal?

[Josh93]

Well it depends on what you mean by that. I've spoken to girl in my uni (not sure if they count as "adult women". Obviously i've never had sex. I've kissed a few girls in clubs and danced with them but that's about it.

Yes i know women get off by having their clits rubbed and whatnot..

I think you missed my point entirely...Your argument that women don't enjoy sex is completely absurd (some female support on this one would be much appreciated! ).

I'm not jaded or bitchy towards women at all (well maybe slightly) but most of the time i dont really pay them much attention because it's not like they're gonna like me anyway is it?

You realise this is the perfect example of a self-fulfilling prophecy, right?
Ignoring them because they will ignore you, genius...Who says they aren't going to like you? A lot of girls REALLY go for confidence in a guy and you're losing that battle before it's even begun.

What do you suggest i do then pal?

Honestly?
You need a female friend, an actual close female friend and preferably one which you aren't trying to get with - if you can't interact with girls as friends then you're going to find starting/maintaining any sort of relationship impossible.
Develop your confidence, stop worrying about what they do or don't want in guys, stop externalising your problems and blaming female selection for your inability to find a relationship/whatever it is you're looking for and generally sound less like an angsty teenager.

Guess what, I haven't had sex yet either, statistically speaking neither have a reasonable number of people on this forum, does it bother me...yes, a bit.
Does it make me want to rant at the female gender for their inability to see what a great partner I would be...Not so much.
Bottom line, if you want to have a relationship then you need to get used to interacting with girls socially, if you can't manage that then there is no hope for you.

[Anonymous]

(Original post by Josh93)
I think you missed my point entirely...Your argument that women don't enjoy sex is completely absurd (some female support on this one would be much appreciated! ).



You realise this is the perfect example of a self-fulfilling prophecy, right?
Ignoring them because they will ignore you, genius...Who says they aren't going to like you? A lot of girls REALLY go for confidence in a guy and you're losing that battle before it's even begun.



Honestly?
You need a female friend, an actual close female friend and preferably one which you aren't trying to get with - if you can't interact with girls as friends then you're going to find starting/maintaining any sort of relationship impossible.
Develop your confidence, stop worrying about what they do or don't want in guys, stop externalising your problems and blaming female selection for your inability to find a relationship/whatever it is you're looking for and generally sound less like an angsty teenager.

Guess what, I haven't had sex yet either, statistically speaking neither have a reasonable number of people on this forum, does it bother me...yes, a bit.
Does it make me want to rant at the female gender for their inability to see what a great partner I would be...Not so much.
Bottom line, if you want to have a relationship then you need to get used to interacting with girls socially, if you can't manage that then there is no hope for you.

If they do then whatever.....


I've just completed a course of therapy with a really good female therapist. She mentioned the idea of a self fulfilling prophecy which is the first time I'd ever come across it. Right now i'm having a difficult time believing that a girl could even like me.


The only female friend i have is my flatmate. She's pretty cool and we do talk a bit. I dont have any female friends because i don't trust women that much. My relationship with my sister is awful and im in the midst of patching it up as we've not spoken for almost a year because of her abusive nature. That whole experience of being verbally abused for 3 years has left me jaded and untrusting of girls.
I'm in the process of developing my confidence and that will take a while.
Right now i'm really not in the state of mind to get involved with girls and become close friends with them because i will not lay out all my deepest darkest secrets only to get betrayed again because girls share everything with each other.

I could find a partner if i wanted i just have a lot of negative feelings towards girls my age in general.

[Josh93]

(Original post by Anonymous)
If they do then whatever.....


I've just completed a course of therapy with a really good female therapist. She mentioned the idea of a self fulfilling prophecy which is the first time I'd ever come across it. Right now i'm having a difficult time believing that a girl could even like me.


The only female friend i have is my flatmate. She's pretty cool and we do talk a bit. I dont have any female friends because i don't trust women that much. My relationship with my sister is awful and im in the midst of patching it up as we've not spoken for almost a year because of her abusive nature. That whole experience of being verbally abused for 3 years has left me jaded and untrusting of girls.
I'm in the process of developing my confidence and that will take a while.
Right now i'm really not in the state of mind to get involved with girls and become close friends with them because i will not lay out all my deepest darkest secrets only to get betrayed again because girls share everything with each other.

I could find a partner if i wanted i just have a lot of negative feelings towards girls my age in general.

Look, I'm sorry that you have such a bad relationship with your sister and I hope the therapy helps but the only way that I can see you getting over this is to start normally interacting with women.

Then don't lay out all of your 'deepest, darkest secrets'....I think you'd be surprised anyway, if you are genuinely close most wouldn't just talk to their friends about everything you said if you made it clear that you didn't want them to.
Anyway, my point is that you just need to start talking to them, socialising with more mixed groups etc - don't worry about building trust or relationships or any of that rubbish just behave as you would if they were guys (maybe tone down any crude jokes until you know them a bit better), be friendly (but not creepy, there's a fine line) and just get used to interacting with girls again. The more you talk to and hang out with as friends the more you will realise that the pre-conceptions you have of their gender are largely ridiculous. Yes some girls are shallow, thoughtless, materialistic etc but the vast majority are perfectly nice.