Is a guy's career and income important to a girl?

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I've had known girls who the moment they heard I was an investment banker, they said "goodbye" or "get lost" it was also right around the time when bankers were getting a lot of hammering in the media.

Reply 21

RubyShoes

Original post by Anonymous

You could say the exact same with genders reversed. However finding a woman with ambition is often not crucial from a man's perspective, from what I've seen.

It probably depends on the man.
My partner says one of the things that he was really attracted to was the fact i had a career plan and was doing a masters degree.

I initially was wary of him because his job was really not what a 30 year old should be doing and that made me think twice. But he is very ambitious and is working his way up the company, so that's enough for me.

We work on our career goals together and encourage each other because we both want to reach the same point in our lives.

Reply 22

Anonymous #2

Original post by RubyShoes

Of course it will depend on the man, but it seems far less universal for men to bothered. The women in this thread almost unanimously agree.

Is your partner in a lower paid career than you?

Reply 23

Zoombini

Original post by Inverse

I disagree. Some partners will find their partners' field of employment and work-related goals extremely boring and will never maintain an interest or pretence of interest in it.

All that should concern a partner is whether or not their efforts to maintain financial wellbeing are paying off. (unintended pun)

It would be especially ironic if the wife/husband is unemployed/looks after their children and is worried about their partners' ambitions rather than whether or not their family can be supported.

This was posted from The Student Room's Android App on my HTC One X

Yeh but i think most people would want to be with someone that enjoys their job rather than someone that is bored with it but has no ambition to improve their position. And I agree with the idea that it would be weird for someone to be more concerned with ambition than whether or not their family can be supported but your asking students here most of us aren't thinking about starting a family. Maybe it changes when you get older but at the moment I think ambition is alot more important than income especially during the current economic situation.

I dont want a boyfriend to support me financially, I can do that myself. I want a boyfriend with drive and motivation.

Reply 24

RubyShoes

Original post by Anonymous

Of course it will depend on the man, but it seems far less universal for men to bothered. The women in this thread almost unanimously agree.

Is your partner in a lower paid career than you?

Thats probably because men are used to being the provider, so their partner's ambition probably isnt as much of a concern.

Its kind of difficult to tell. We work for the same company, and when we met, he was doing the same job as me, now he is my manager.

But im only doing the job part time while i finish my masters, so i haven't decided whether to stay on in a career context yet.

Reply 25

Spontogical

I like what I'm reading; but this is TSR so I'd expect the responses to mainly be in favour of drive or ambition. I feel the same. As long as she has the ambition to become the best person she can be, then I couldn't care less how much she earns. b'sides, I prefer someone that enjoys their job and earns a low amount than someone that comes home complaining every night about how boring/difficult/annoying their job and workmates are. :rolleyes:

Reply 26

Anonymous #2

Original post by RubyShoes

Thats probably because men are used to being the provider, so their partner's ambition probably isnt as much of a concern.

This notion just seems archaic to me, and is being reinforced in this thread to an extent. That's where my issue lies.

Reply 27

Goody2Shoes-x

I'd say it's important, but not a defining factor. I wouldn't want to get married to a guy who was happy to spend his life on benefits, for example, but I wouldn't shoot a guy down just for not being a really committed career type. If he's in a respectable job, making a living, and he's happy, so am I.

Reply 28

Agenda Suicide

I couldn't care if you had no money, no career or you had billions and the world as your oyster.

If you are that great person, you are the person I want to bring with me through good times and bad. I don't see the problem.

of course there are gold diggers, but it's pretty apparent who they are.

Reply 29

RubyShoes

Original post by Anonymous

This notion just seems archaic to me, and is being reinforced in this thread to an extent. That's where my issue lies.

what else do you expect? society has been patriarchal for thousands of years, it hasn't changed much in recent times either. the fact remains that men usually earn more than women and women usually take on the role of caregiver in families. So obviously the career ambitions of each person will hold more weight depending on which role you take on in the family.

Reply 30

hiding12

Original post by Moltica

I think it's more attractive if the guy enjoys and has a passion for his career. My boyfriend is a book seller. He enjoys his current job and seeing him happy makes me happy.

This was posted from The Student Room's iPhone/iPad App

lol, if only more women were like you. I saw this program the other day where this guy had a job he loved in science and research and his wife was berating him for doing it because it didn't bring as much income as another job, which he hated the thought of and which paid better, I felt terrible for him

Reply 31

hiding12

Original post by RubyShoes

what was he doing at 30?

Reply 32

Dirac Delta Function

Original post by hiding12

Science research is not a sexy profession. Most of the time, I get responses from women along the lines of "why would anyone want to do this??".

Some women have been impressed, but they were friends, not romantic interests.

Reply 33

pr0view

Original post by Ano1

For these girls yah.

There is a keyword missing from that song that i just can't put my finger on! :confused:

Reply 34

RubyShoes

Original post by hiding12

what was he doing at 30?

The same job i was doing at 21. Just a basic clinic worker.

He messed up A levels and barely passed his Law degree and then spent lots of years bouncing from one very low standard job to another.

Reply 35

Anonymous #2

Original post by RubyShoes

True, though I find it slightly ridiculous that it should affect attraction at its absolute core. I believed our modern society would be more liberal. Perhaps I'm getting my panties in a twist over nothing, though. Thanks for explaining.

Reply 36

brunettegirl92

well, i'm at university, and i want to be top of my career (get a phd and specialize in something). I personally am an ambitious and intelligent person.
I find intelligence attractive, and i like ambitious guys. he doesn't have to have a high pay packet - that would be hypocritical as in the profession i want to go into, the pay isn't great. however, i would like a guy who has drive to further and better himself, and improve his life, rather than be a bit of a bum.

Reply 37

RubyShoes

Original post by Anonymous

I think its a complex thing. there's obviously the old fashioned element of 'i want a boyfriend/husband who can pay for me'

and then there's also more women going to university and getting top jobs and expecting their partners to push themselves in the same way.

For me, i worked hard, got into a top Uni and i've stuck with it over 5 years to get a degree and maters despite HATING it at times and feeling incredibly low.
I did it because the end result will get me where i want in life, so i wouldn't accept a man who didn't have the same kind of drive.