[insignificant]

So the other day I was happily eating some wine gums as you do, and at the bottom of the packet was this gross squashed sticky thing which smelt like liquorice.

I could've just thrown it away and forgotten about it, but that is not my nature, when there are free wine gums to be claimed ! haha.

So when I write the letter of complaint, do I go down the angry route.. the really long annoying route.. the professional sounding route, how shall I write it?

[nicatre]

I don't think you have any thing to say really, you can complain and state you weren't entirely satisfied but beyond that...

[TheSownRose]

You always get a better response by being polite.

[Vohamanah]

(Original post by insignificant)
So the other day I was happily eating some wine gums as you do, and at the bottom of the packet was this gross squashed sticky thing which smelt like liquorice.

I could've just thrown it away and forgotten about it, but that is not my nature, when there are free wine gums to be claimed ! haha.

So when I write the letter of complaint, do I go down the angry route.. the really long annoying route.. the professional sounding route, how shall I write it?

I would go down the politely shocked route. Like its the worst thing that's happened since the lawnmower wouldn't start for a week last summer and you had to borrow one from him next door.

[miser]

I would write and be polite and attach a photograph of what you found in your wine gums. Be nice about it, and hopefully they will send you some complimentary ones.

[The BigET]

Man. I HATE liquorice!

Say something like:

Dear Sir/Madam

I recently ate a bag of your wine gums, and they were less than satisfactory. If you could be so kind as to either refund my money for the purchase or to send a new properly packaged packet, or i'll be forced to sue your greedy sweet making asses!

Yours faithfully

Mr Insignificant

[EatRainbows]

Polite and professional yet forceful.

[Mr. Approachable]

Just enquire why Bertie Basset was at the bottom of a wine gum packet.

[DanLorenzo]

Say after extensive examination it turned out to be turd and demand a free life long supply of wine gums.

[insignificant]

(Original post by Vohamanah)
I would go down the politely shocked route. Like its the worst thing that's happened since the lawnmower wouldn't start for a week last summer and you had to borrow one from him next door.

I was thinking something like this

I do have faith in companies giving free stuff, I remember when I was about 10 and wrote to Rocky saying how much I loved their rocky bars in the hope I'd get a load of free stuff and I got a MASSIVE box of about 200 rocky bars including some that hadn't been released yet.

I want 200 bags of wine gums

[tamimi]

I bet you even ate the liquorice.

[ROYP]

tell them if the matter isn't sorted out (with free wine gums) you aren't above kidnapping the families of the fatcat wine gum CEOs. write it in blood as well so they know you aren't to be ****ed with

[Vohamanah]

(Original post by insignificant)
I was thinking something like this

I do have faith in companies giving free stuff, I remember when I was about 10 and wrote to Rocky saying how much I loved their rocky bars in the hope I'd get a load of free stuff and I got a MASSIVE box of about 200 rocky bars including some that hadn't been released yet.

I want 200 bags of wine gums

When my cousin was a young teenager she wrote off to a load of cosmetic companies asking for free stuff and they sent her loads of samples to try out their products. She had buckets of free make-up, it was great

[Phalanges]

To whom it may concern,

I purchased some wine gums and found a gross squashed sticky thing at the bottom of the bag. After eating all of the wine gums I then decided to write to you and ask for some more for free. Because I care deeply about this issue, I consulted with the internet about how to word my complaint in order to generate maximum swag. This is the best they could come up with.

Yours sincerely,

insignificant

[jimmyrussles]

Dear Wine Gums.

I am writing to aware you on a wine gum that I have found at the bottom of a pack. Despite this being completely normal I have found it necessary to complain, in order to fulfill some sense of self-righteousness.

Regards

Butthurt Phaggot

[insignificant]

(Original post by jimmyrussles)
Dear Wine Gums.

I am writing to aware you on a green wine gum that I have found at the bottom of a pack. Despite this being completely normal I have found it necessary to complain, in order to fulfill some sense of self-righteousness.

Regards

Butthurt Phaggot

I'd love to know where I stated it was green.

[Mads_300]

I really want some wine gums now


This was posted from The Student Room's iPhone/iPad App

[Vohamanah]

(Original post by Mads_300)
I really want some wine gums now


This was posted from The Student Room's iPhone/iPad App

I really want some wine now.

[insignificant]

(Original post by Vohamanah)
I really want some wine now.

+1

You have reached the limit of how many posts you can rate today!

[I Gurn Hard]

Sign off with "written by Mummy for Ruby, age 7".