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4 Seasons Pt. 1

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    Here's a little rhyme I put together, just want some feedback on it. It's just something I do in my spare time...

    So about two years back, around the time I started to slack,
    I was handed my college timetable and what was printed in black,
    My subjects such as Physics, Maths, I.T and Art,
    Determination to succeed wasn't present, so I failed to start,
    My dress code consisted of blue jeans matched with street clothes,
    From Spring to Summer, even in Autumn to when the weather froze,
    I kept it real with all my peers I grew closer to,
    Even now, as I'm expressing my story to you...

    This is just a short version of what I had written down just to give you an idea...
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    Bump... Would like some feedback please and if anyone would like to hear a second part?
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    *OP i enjoyed part I and hope that this meets with your approval


    Part II

    so listen up children
    you may think it's cool
    to chill with your bredren
    when you should be in school
    this sad mutha***** has thrown it away
    no prospects no income
    no future no pay
    his garments are mouldy
    his friends all are gone
    he can't go to college
    for grades he has none
    so turn off your ipods
    and break out the books
    the examiners don't give
    a flying **** for your looks
    it's all about learning
    improving your mind
    if you leave it too late
    you'll be always behind;
    and after attaining
    your glittering prize
    why then you can
    chill out and hang
    with the guys

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Updated: June 10, 2012
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