i had exactly the same.
I have nightmares where i am being taken away from my family by him. he also threatened to kill my siblings. I have horrible dreams where I am lost, can't find my family, or they are hurt, threatened or even die. I think thats because of him.
A few years ago, he wanted information about my ucas so he knew which uni i was going to. I was worried he would find me and hurt me when i was away form home and my family.
as a child he hated my male siblings but was obsessed with me. he wouldn't leave me alone and he started to touch me in inapropriate places - i was under the age of 5. I know its a hypothetical situation, but its horrible to think what could have happened if contact continued.
and the worst thing is that it creeps up on me. most of the time when i'm drunk i'm fine, but sometimes, for some reason I just freak out and feel as if there is something very wrong with me. I feel afraid. as such I start to avoid having to much alcohol incase i freak, but i don't think its right that i stop doing normal uni student things, particuarly when all my friends are.
all I can recomend is councilling.
but I find that easier said than done. some things I find it hard to talk about. I try to be open, so people who have had similar or worse feel that they can talk aswell, but some things i feel slightly ashamed of.
if you need to talk more privately to someone who has had similar experiences, feel free to pm me xx
Last edited by brunettegirl92; 14-06-2012 at 23:56.