How do you deal with friends who treat you like rubbish all the time?
For questions and advice about interpersonal relationships with friends, housemates, family and work colleagues.
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How do you deal with friends who treat you like rubbish all the time?Hey everyone,
I have a few friends that when in a certain group of people treat me like rubbish! When its just them they're fine and we get on like a house on fire. I keep thinking I should just cut all ties, and be a social recluse until september when I leave to university.
The problem is I don't want to be the one to act, because they will probably just turn it on me, and make me look like the one in the wrong.
Can anyone give me any advice? -
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Re: How do you deal with friends who treat you like rubbish all the time?Same exact situation. I chose to break it off a few months ago; they didn't notice at first but started stalking me online (in fact, I found out today they were still doing it!). At least they were nasty in whoever's company, not just a couple people.
Being a social recluse is lonely, I won't lie, but it is a relief not to be obliged to talk to them anymore. Just make sure that, if you ever logged on to any accounts via their computers, sign out of all sessions/change passwords/delete accounts. I could write a short story about all the crap they've pulled since then.
I don't know specifics, but from what you've written, I would guess that they would be quite nasty to you. If you need to, gather evidence beforehand (like write things down!) so that you know exactly why you broke it off. Have a strong conviction about what you're doing, because it will probably be an ordeal. That's if you decide to end the friendship. I recommend focusing on your studies with your extra time, or doing a hobby.
If not, I can't really give much advice. I only realized how unhappy I was with my group after one particularly nasty message. Before that, it was like taking their crap all the time.
Bottom line: can you make it to September? If you're a social person, maybe not. If you're naturally a bit shy anyway, maybe. Make sure you're absolutely sure before you do anything. -
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Re: How do you deal with friends who treat you like rubbish all the time?I had this situation, they weren't too bad with me but still made me feel uncomfortable, I didn't make it obvious that I was breaking off, just did it slowly. Im glad with the decision I made, I still see them but they have more respect so I still hang around with them but a lot less than before. It's probably easier for me though as they're not school friends.
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Re: How do you deal with friends who treat you like rubbish all the time?Thank you, both of you! Its been very annoying, I'm gonna take from both of your pieces of advice and try and get away from the group, and perhaps start a new hobby. I think I'm just scared of having no one, but thanks again. Your advice was greatly appreciated!
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Re: How do you deal with friends who treat you like rubbish all the time?I had a situation like that at the start of 6th form. After a few months it got to the point where I thought "**** them, I can do better". So I got to know likeminded people from subjects and am leaving 6th form with a great group of people.
Simply - they're not worth your time. It can be tough to accept (it was for me) but cut ties and it'll all be fine
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Re: How do you deal with friends who treat you like rubbish all the time?In all honesty? Tell them to f off. I had people around me when growing up that did nothing than to drag me down. One day I just decided I wont take it anymore. And I just told them what I thought and left.(Original post by jgibson18)
Hey everyone,
I have a few friends that when in a certain group of people treat me like rubbish! When its just them they're fine and we get on like a house on fire. I keep thinking I should just cut all ties, and be a social recluse until september when I leave to university.
The problem is I don't want to be the one to act, because they will probably just turn it on me, and make me look like the one in the wrong.
Can anyone give me any advice?
If you are reaaaaallly worried about what people will say. Just chill, let time pass. Slowly but steadily stop hanging with them through out the summer, and then when Uni time comes, they will soon enough be gone totally. Just tell them you're busy, when you are back home; you have family to meet etc.
Most importantly, don't keep people around you that don't let you be the best of what you are, live's to darn short to feel sad. (And to eat bad food, but that's a completely different subject, but I felt I had to put it out there) -
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Re: How do you deal with friends who treat you like rubbish all the time?Put them in a binbag. Treat them like crap. Tried and tested
On a more serious note, if they are treating you like rubbish, then they are not good friends. It's hard, but you have to start again.Last edited by Kaytti; 16-06-2012 at 00:09. -
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Re: How do you deal with friends who treat you like rubbish all the time?well said!(Original post by Kaytti)
Put them in a binbag. Treat them like crap. Tried and tested
On a more serious note, if they are treating you like rubbish, then they are not good friends. It's hard, but you have to start again. -
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Re: How do you deal with friends who treat you like rubbish all the time?Most of my friends used to comprise of people like this - I stopped talking to them in September and am officially a loner until I go to university this September. It had to be done really, my life is more enjoyable now.
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(Original post by Antifazian)
Cut ties, it's better for you in the long-run. Don't ever put up with people who don't treat you with respect, as long as you've done nothing to cause them to treat you that way.
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In my case I found that when I was with certain 'friends', they were acted differently compared to when they were in a group.(Original post by IHateExams!)
Try talking to thm whn ur on ur own with thm!
This was posted from The Student Room's Android App on my HTC Wildfire S A510e
This was posted from The Student Room's Android App on my GT-S5830
