Don't know how to play this at all
So...I met my boyfriend a while ago but we only became official quite recently. Before we started seeing each other properly, he was diagnosed with depression. Before this, he had a very high sex drive, and now it is practically non-existant. Now it's not a massive issue for me as I'm pretty sure it's a side effect of his meds, and we get on soo well without it that I'm really not fussed, but occasionally it can get frustrating. He seems resigned to the fact that his meds have the side effects they do, and that he'll be on them forever. I don't really know how to talk to him about maybe discussing the issues with his doctor, as I don't want to blow it out of proportion, or make him feel under pressure. Any advice? 
Original post by Anonymous
So...I met my boyfriend a while ago but we only became official quite recently. Before we started seeing each other properly, he was diagnosed with depression. Before this, he had a very high sex drive, and now it is practically non-existant. Now it's not a massive issue for me as I'm pretty sure it's a side effect of his meds, and we get on soo well without it that I'm really not fussed, but occasionally it can get frustrating. He seems resigned to the fact that his meds have the side effects they do, and that he'll be on them forever. I don't really know how to talk to him about maybe discussing the issues with his doctor, as I don't want to blow it out of proportion, or make him feel under pressure. Any advice?
If it's SSRIs the side-effects should of stopped after about a week. Maybe your the problem.
Maybe if you could at least use correct grammar, I'd think you were less of a tit.
Original post by Anonymous
Maybe if you could at least use correct grammar, I'd think you were less of a tit.
Wow. You really are frustrated.
For what it's worth, you do seem to be the problem. Hope this helps.
Well when he tells me that I'm not, I think I'll believe him. Plus he must be attracted to me if he still makes me orgasm. And also, after some research, you are completely wrong.
Original post by Dark Horse
If it's SSRIs the side-effects should of stopped after about a week. Maybe your the problem.
She wanted advice, don't be a douchebag.
OP I think you should have a proper conversation with your bf about it, and going to your doctor to see if there is alternate medication that doesn't have the same side effects is a good idea, sex is an integral part of any relationship! Failing that all you can do is try to spark things up a little in the bedroom to try to bring his appetite for sex back.
Edit: yay for the neg.
(edited 11 years ago)
Original post by foolscap
She wanted advice, don't be a douchebag.
OP I think you should have a proper conversation with your bf about it, and going to your doctor to see if there is alternate medication that doesn't have the same side effects is a good idea, sex is an integral part of any relationship! Failing that all you can do is try to spark things up a little in the bedroom to try to bring his appetite for sex back.
Edit: yay for the neg.
OP I think you should have a proper conversation with your bf about it, and going to your doctor to see if there is alternate medication that doesn't have the same side effects is a good idea, sex is an integral part of any relationship! Failing that all you can do is try to spark things up a little in the bedroom to try to bring his appetite for sex back.
Edit: yay for the neg.
The WK is strong with you.
Original post by Dark Horse
The WK is strong with you.
haha another one for the tally.
(edited 11 years ago)
Original post by foolscap
haha another one for the tally.
That pic makes me SO happy. Saved to my computer so I can look at it another day in the future and smile haha.
Original post by RichyFrench
That pic makes me SO happy. Saved to my computer so I can look at it another day in the future and smile haha.
Likewise!
Anonymous
Have you really probed the depression issue? What kind of depression does he suffer from? What meds has he been prescribed?
It's conceivable that diminished sex drive can result from either a depressed mood, certain medications or both. Have you had a lengthy discussion about the sex issue because in order to tackle the problem effectively then surely you need to do so. If it's important to you then surely he would understand if you sensibly raise this in the appropriate settings?
You don't want to pacified or palmed off by a nonchalant and unfounded attribution to medication when this may not necessarily be the case.
Have you really probed the depression issue? What kind of depression does he suffer from? What meds has he been prescribed?
It's conceivable that diminished sex drive can result from either a depressed mood, certain medications or both. Have you had a lengthy discussion about the sex issue because in order to tackle the problem effectively then surely you need to do so. If it's important to you then surely he would understand if you sensibly raise this in the appropriate settings?
You don't want to pacified or palmed off by a nonchalant and unfounded attribution to medication when this may not necessarily be the case.
I'd say him having sex with you more would actually help alleviate his depression; the feel-good hormones and just the fact of being together would be enough for me to start feeling better about myself, but he might be different and him feeling low all the time will have definitely sapped his energy and decreased his sex-drive a lot.
Talk to him; say to him that you feel having sex more often would lift his mood or if you're getting too frustrated, you could simply say it's having an effect on your relationship and you want him inside you more often. Seeing a doctor would help, but he needs to take steps by himself and learn more about how he is feeling before he can begin to feel better.
Talk to him; say to him that you feel having sex more often would lift his mood or if you're getting too frustrated, you could simply say it's having an effect on your relationship and you want him inside you more often. Seeing a doctor would help, but he needs to take steps by himself and learn more about how he is feeling before he can begin to feel better.
Original post by Dark Horse
The WK is strong with you.
You keep saying this to people. This suggests that the being an ass is strong with you.
Original post by Chumbaniya
You keep saying this to people. This suggests that the being an ass is strong with you.
You don't know the power of the dark side.
My boyfriend has ADHD and when he's on his meds he gets depressed. It's horrible and I find that I'm less attracted to him when he's on them so I feel your pain. I'm pretty lucky cause he rarely takes them anymore but it is such a horrible position to be in. I think you need to have a serious think about whether or not you want to be in that position. If you love him despite the depression, you'll work through it. But you should never feel like you have to stay with him to take care of him. It should be something that you want to do. Definitely speak to him Communication is so important. He'd want to know if anything was upsetting you and it'll make you feel better too.
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