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Terribly awkward with guys!

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    I have been in single sex schools all my life. Not only that, but I also do not have any male siblings, and dad's abroad working. If I'm lucky I see him couple times a year - so basically, I have near zero contact with guys. Some of my friends have got boyfriends, but I have only said the occasional hi to them and that's it. Obviously, I have no male friends.

    On the streets when men try to talk to me I just get really nervous, mumble something and walk away fast, I feel terrible. I can't even keep eye contact with them due to the awkwardness I'd feel. It's not due to self esteem problems, I've had several compliments on my looks from friends and randomers alike but I just seem to wrap my head around it. I've met some male friends during house parties and they did try to talk to me but same problem, I get terribly shy and just don't know what to say so end up making a tit of myself! Problem is I'm fine and bubbly with girlfriends but with guys I just freeze up - hate myself for this.

    Going off to uni this September and I fear that this would affect me adversely, help on getting over this?
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    Practice, practice, practice.
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    Ask your girl friends to try and help you become more comfortable around guys.
    • Thread Starter
    #1

    My girlfriends don't know that I've got this issue as I've dated once (didn't turn out well as he kept pressuring me into sex) and I'm afraid that I would come across as a weirdo to them... In fact they think that I've dated loads of boys! Would texting guys be a good first step?
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    I was and am still pretty awkward but I do have some very close guy friends who I am very comfortable with now. I would say texting is a good first step, so long as you don't pretend they don't exist when you see them face to face (something I learned the hard way)... Don't flirt with them, you just want to make friends for now.

    Smile, say hi when you see them, build on a joke from your text conversation. All important ways to improve face to face contact :-)

    Now, proceed to make a phone call... use that voice. Make the call lengthy (unless he sounds as if he wants to get away). Make jokes, be witty, interesting etc.

    And finally, keep practicing, be trusting. Let them know more about you!

    Good luck!
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    Haha, I was well awkward with guys in Year 7, 8 when I was in a single sex school. So, Year 9 onwards I got the train in. At first I was taken aback with all the boys from the other local private mixed school but meh after a few years, I'm in a relationship with one now and have lots of boys as my friends. 'Sall good. You just relax, treat 'em like girls... they also love innuendos. I guess I was lucky 'cos I've got a boys sense of humour.

    It's healthy to have male friends outside of school. Don't worry, you'll get into it.
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    (Original post by Anonymous)
    I have been in single sex schools all my life. Not only that, but I also do not have any male siblings, and dad's abroad working. If I'm lucky I see him couple times a year - so basically, I have near zero contact with guys. Some of my friends have got boyfriends, but I have only said the occasional hi to them and that's it. Obviously, I have no male friends.

    On the streets when men try to talk to me I just get really nervous, mumble something and walk away fast, I feel terrible. I can't even keep eye contact with them due to the awkwardness I'd feel. It's not due to self esteem problems, I've had several compliments on my looks from friends and randomers alike but I just seem to wrap my head around it. I've met some male friends during house parties and they did try to talk to me but same problem, I get terribly shy and just don't know what to say so end up making a tit of myself! Problem is I'm fine and bubbly with girlfriends but with guys I just freeze up - hate myself for this.

    Going off to uni this September and I fear that this would affect me adversely, help on getting over this?
    Guys have more problems than girls do with this. Just don't worry, talk to them, it's hard I know, but remember, the only difference between a guy and the girl is that the guy doesn't have breasts or a vagina. Basically, they're human too and go through the same things.

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Updated: June 24, 2012
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