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How can you tell if your boyfriend doesn't love you anymore?

If they suddenly stop saying "I love you" and being as affectionate, does that mean they don't?

Sorry, I'm really inexperienced with relationships and pretty insecure, if you haven't guessed that all ready. Also I love this guy to pieces, if you haven't guessed that as well haha. I know this seems kinda pathetic and I kind of feel pathetic for asking. But, please, help?

Reply 1

ct2k7

It could be a lot of things, but you'll know. It could be that they are really stressed. Some guys don't deal with stress well.

Reply 2

For The Love Of Giraffe

Maybe something is on his mind or he is preoccupied? I think until you get a chance to sit him down and can talk to him about it, it's best not to assume and let your mind run. I'm guilty of being insecure and letting my mind over-react too and I've just learnt that normally I'm wrong and I should have just ignored my mind until I got a chance to talk to my boyfriend and see what actually is happening, if I feel that something was wrong.

And I don't think saying 'I love you' and being affectionate is the only way to determine if he loves you - maybe some of the cuteness has died down for a while if he's having a hard time or is stressed, but I'm sure if he's still there for you and still is talking to you the same, his love hasn't changed.

So yeah, talk to him and just see what's up :smile:

Reply 3

elixira

I think when you get that desperate feeling, like you're out of control, you're the weak one...

It's not unsalvageable though. For a lot of guys, the love seems to come a lot later.

Reply 4

Dream.On

ermm bf and gfs cant love eachother, its affection, cause in the end they break up eventually #thatswhatIbelieve

(edited 11 years ago)

Reply 5

For The Love Of Giraffe

Original post by Dream.On

ermm bf and gfs cant love eachother, its affection, cause in the end they break up eventually #thatswhatIbelieve

What, so every boyfriend and girlfriend breaks up? What rubbish. How can you find someone that you love without going through the boyfriend/girlfriend stage first (or something similar)?

Reply 6

Lucia.

You gotta make sure they communicate with you about why they're not showing affection...otherwise your relationship will go down the pan...happened to me.

Reply 7

Robbob16

He's definitely cheating and has got someone pregnant, phone Jeremy Kyle and ask for a lie detector test to be sure though, and you get £50 for going on there! Silver lining or what!

This was posted from The Student Room's iPhone/iPad App

Reply 8

Anonymous #2

Not really. It just means they aren't as much in the honey moon phase and they are more settled. Its not necessarily a bad thing, because he probably still loves you, even a lot more. But he is so content, maybe he doesn't feel like showering you I loves you and all.
It may sound weird, but I've been in the same exact situation, where my gf thought I didnt love her any more because I became comfortable.

But look at your parents (assuming they are together, if not look at someone's else parents), they have been together for a good 20years now I'd say. They must really love each other very very much, but does your dad say I love you more than 4 times in the day? Does he do a lot of affectionate things for your mother. Probably not, he is probably like how you bf is at the moment. But that's not to say that your dad loves your mother any less.

Reply 9

Anonymous #2

Oh to add to the post. Talk to him and tell him how you feel though. communication is key. However this is like catch-22 situation. If he does change to his old ways, don't think he is just doing it because you said so. Because he probably isn't. Otherwise he damned if he changes and damned if he doesn't. Speaking from experience.

Reply 10

Dream.On

Original post by For The Love Of Giraffe

What, so every boyfriend and girlfriend breaks up? What rubbish. How can you find someone that you love without going through the boyfriend/girlfriend stage first (or something similar)?

ok not every couple but 99% of the time, they have to be with more than one person before they settle down

Reply 11

rosiemaphone

Original post by Dream.On

ermm bf and gfs cant love eachother, its affection, cause in the end they break up eventually #thatswhatIbelieve

Frankly, I think this is ridiculous. I love my boyfriend right now - but I'm well aware I probably won't love him forever. People who say real love lasts for eternity are living in fairy tales, but that doesn't make the love I have or anyone else has any less real.

Just like I have very close friends who I have lost touch with, but that doesn't take anything away from the value of the friendship we had.

Reply 12

WillChapman

I suggest going on the Jeremy Kyle show

Reply 13

Juicy J

It's not pathetic, don't feel like that. The only way to find out if he loves you is by asking him. Maybe not right now, you can give him some time and wait for him to say it before you ask him whether he loves you. Easy :smile:

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