[LordBradburn]

Feeling philosophical and ended up writing some poems, there not very polished but O well give me your opinions please

One Night of philosophical Thought


1#
Swimming through life
Breathing when i need to
Im flowing with the current
But the tide must change.

2#
I've made some bad choices,
She says that's a common thing,
But why would I want to be common?
I want to be like a diamond, sought after.

She tells me to learn from my mistakes
And told me there were no retakes in life.
So how long will it take me? To graduate..
from the university of life.

3#
Is life not based on probability?
Luck controls your life
so learn from the top poker player
Only if your lucky enough to own the textbook of course.

4#
Should one choose a subject title?
before the masterpiece is written
does the title not reveal itself once the art it complete?
Just like the pure randomness of life.
the work of art He the Lord named Earth

5#
The system
tells you to get up in the morning
tells you YOU are unique
'go get an education'
then push the mangle of society
of your brothers

Some rats escaped
For a week or two
But sooner or later the big hand dropped them unwillingly,
back into the rat race

6#
The experienced
The tired
slapped by the system so many times their souls break
Lost their enthusiasm
Learnt their system's boundrys
Is that desirable? To the system?
To have a wise man play you?
No.
This is why God makes the most efficient man frail
Is the system owned by God or my elder brothers?
No one can tell me
I am a man in the dark
Like all my brothers
I was told all men were born the equal
But they're wrong
It's the souls that were created the same.

[the bear]

#1 and #6 were the best for me.
Clear and interesting.

[Chow mein]

I don't really like 2 and 3


But the others are good, agree with the poster above 1 and 6 are nice. I like 1 as its just short and you sort of get thinking.

[LordBradburn]

(Original post by the bear)
#1 and #6 were the best for me.
Clear and interesting.

Thankyou

[LordBradburn]

(Original post by Chow mein)
I don't really like 2 and 3


But the others are good, agree with the poster above 1 and 6 are nice. I like 1 as its just short and you sort of get thinking.

thank you for responding yeah i agree with you 2 and 3 are crap Lol