[lilahnurave]

I really feel like I havent gotten everything out of my first year that I was hoping for. I was put in accommodation with internationals who never came out of their rooms (believe me, I tried!) and so I didnt get to make a group of close knit friends like some of my other mates have with their flatmates. I feel like they have a 'family' away from home, and I'm so envious. Also I was really shy in the first couple terms and only really came out my shell in the last term, so although I have friends, I feel like socially I just havent settled in and found my niche. To add to this, I broke up with my boyfriend a few weeks ago, and everything at uni just reminds me of him. I'm wondering if I should just bite the bullet and try and transfer somewhere new for next year, cause I feel its too late really to meet new people at my uni - everyones so cliquey and just doesnt want to know. I really want to have the uni experience I dreamed of, I just dont think I can have it here.
Any thoughts..? x

[math1234]

Change your accommodation.
And btw are you at uni to study or to make friends?


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[lilahnurave]

(Original post by math1234)
Change your accommodation.
And btw are you at uni to study or to make friends?


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Its too late to change, uni's finished for the year. I was put on the list to change but noone wanted to swap (understandably). I'm there for both, 50/50..

[math1234]

swap it with the students coming in sep 2012


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[Chief Wiggum]

Could you not just stick it out for 2 more years? I mean, I know it's far from ideal, but there's no guarantee your next university would be any less cliquey.

[lilahnurave]

(Original post by math1234)
swap it with the students coming in sep 2012


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Good idea, but we only get to stay on campus for the first year. After that we move out. I have new flatmates for september but... theyre not that exciting.... I guess I would just like the chance to start all over again

[math1234]

just lil' curious, what unin are you at? & what option do you have if you want to change?


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[poony]

Which uni. are you at ? Apart from Oxbridge, I thought most uni. will only gurantee accommdation for 1st year. Is it worth changing uni. just because of accommodation ? Even so, you better put your skate on because most uni. will be closing down soon until mid. August.

[Popppppy]

(Original post by poony)
Which uni. are you at ? Apart from Oxbridge, I thought most uni. will only gurantee accommdation for 1st year. Is it worth changing uni. just because of accommodation ? Even so, you better put your skate on because most uni. will be closing down soon until mid. August.

Universities don't close down over summer, they're not like schools. People are doing research all year round, the admin staff keep working, they also run summer schools and some even let out their halls to the public.

[edjunkie]

Whilst Unis do not close down in the summer, your ability to get things done for the next academic year does slow down. Key course directors and admin staff take their holidays in July - first 3 week of August. Voice mails and emails can go unanswered. They arrive back in time to deal with the A level result workload.

To the OP, why are you not able to make close friends with people on your course or the wider university? Where you live should not limit or dictate the type of friends you make. It is not too late to make friends, but you are going to make more of an effort.

I can almost guarantee that at least one of the close friendships that you envy will not last the duration of the course. Proximity and living in shared accommodation can destroy many a good friendship.

Ask yourself, given your personality are your non academic university expectations realistic? Transferring to another university will not magically change your personality and you risk repeating your first year disappointment in a new location. If you are able to transfer, would you be repeating the first year or going into the second year? If the first year, then you will be last in the queue for accommodation, so could end up in the same type of hall that you dislike now. If the second year, you may feel everyone else knows each other and you can't make friends. You may not even get a place in halls.

Assuming that you are doing okay academically, put your first year disappointments behind you and treat the second year as a blank sheet. There will be a new influx of students, in amongst them you may find your next best friend. You will have the advantage of knowing where everything is in halls and uni, you could cast yourself as the go to, supportive older surrogate sibling. But be prepared to learn from your surrogate siblings.