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TSR Troll Party

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    Admittedly we may have to change our name later on (suggestions are welcome). But well, for now let's get down to business:

    1. We support a progressive income tax. However, unlike the socialists who hate freedom, we believe it should be progressive in favour of the wealth producers; statistically the poorest 1% earn on average £5600 a year, whereas the wealthiest 1% earn £149000. This means the wealthiest 1% earn around 26.6 times what the poorest 1% earn, and so rightfully the poorest 1% should pay 26.6 times what the wealthiest 1% pay in order to ensure that everyone pays their fair share and is not scrounger off others.

    2. Creationism to supplant evolution in schools. Anyone convicted of preaching this nonsense shall be sent to live in the wilderness where we can really see if they are the "fittest" and thus able to survive according to their dogma.

    3. Though the Troll Party agrees that the death penalty is wrong as it does not punish people enough, we feel that a proper deterrent is needed to prevent drug abuse, sexual immorality and other unforgivable crimes. Therefore, we propose having them locked in a room with nothing and no-one but food, water, and a loudspeaker with a Justin Beiber album being played on a loop and on full volume. This will continue until their death. If that's not a deterrent, we don't know what is.

    4. Help prevent the New World Order by removing all environmental legislation. We thank Lord Monckton for opening our eyes on this.

    5. The Isle of Man to be renamed the Isle of Germs, as they are likely the most common organism there.

    6. Castration of people whose loins are engaged in filth and depravity.

    7. Everyone must have their eyes sewn shut outside school/working hours so as to prevent them seeing any nudity, violence or any other EVIL vices either in newspapers, magazines, on television, the internet, films or in real life.

    8. The national anthem to be changed to this:

    9. Declaration of war on France in order to plunder them for their key natural resources such as snails, frogs, and cute French girls. This would facilitate a frog's leg based recovery to the UK (to be renamed Trolland) economy.

    10. 25th December to be made national touch a boob day.

    11. In order to reduce money spent on pensions, heroin is to be made compulsory upon retirement.

    So far these are all the policies in our manifesto. However, we encourage others to propose other brilliant policies. People interested in joining the Troll Party:
    - The Socktor
    -dongonaeatu
    -cl_steele

    -Fynch101
    -
    -geetar
    -
    iSoftie
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    Not funny.
    • 17 followers
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    Heh, i saw it coming, but the first one got a chuckle out of me.
    • 18 followers
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    Well as trolls are a large portion of the TSR demographic why shouldn't they have representation?
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    Is the thread a lowlife ?
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    (Original post by The Socktor)
    Admittedly we may have to change our name later on (suggestions are welcome). But well, for now let's get down to business:

    1. We support a progressive income tax. However, unlike the socialists who hate freedom, we believe it should be progressive in favour of the wealth producers; statistically the poorest 1% earn on average £5600 a year, whereas the wealthiest 1% earn £149000. This means the wealthiest 1% earn around 26.6 times what the poorest 1% earn, and so rightfully the poorest 1% should pay 26.6 times what the wealthiest 1% pay in order to ensure that everyone pays their fair share and is not scrounger off others.

    2. Creationism to supplant evolution in schools. Anyone convicted of preaching this nonsense shall be sent to live in the wilderness where we can really see if they are the "fittest" and thus able to survive according to their dogma.

    3. Though the Troll Party agrees that the death penalty is wrong as it does not punish people enough, we feel that a proper deterrent is needed to prevent drug abuse, sexual immorality and other unforgivable crimes. Therefore, we propose having them locked in a room with nothing and no-one but food, water, and a loudspeaker with a Justin Beiber album being played on a loop and on full volume. This will continue until their death. If that's not a deterrent, we don't know what is.

    4. Help prevent the New World Order by removing all environmental legislation. We thank Lord Monckton for opening our eyes on this.

    5. The Isle of Man to be renamed the Isle of Germs, as they are likely the most common organism there.

    So far these are all the policies in our manifesto. However, we encourage others to propose other brilliant policies.

    People interested in joining the Troll Party:

    -The Socktor.
    Count me in.
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    I'm not a political guy, but this makes me believe again.
    • 29 followers
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    This is right up Internetguru's street.
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    Why not just join The Monster Raving Loony Party?
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    Policy suggestions

    Ageing population, pensions, healthcare solution

    Adopt ancient Egyptian medical practises to reduce healthcare and pension costs whilst keeping a healthy majority of the population within working age.

    Welfare

    Introduce laws making it illegal to sell products for prices over 99p. This will mean all people in the country become rich as they buy mansions, yachts etc for cut prices which will reduce our welfare expenditure.

    Nationalise Runescape
    We feel conservatives have privatised too much and more must be given back to the people. In order to do this we will nationalise Runescape and make membership free for all British citizens.
    • 15 followers
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    Internetguru! This party is made for you!
    • 141 followers
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    You could call your bills 'kills', your motions 'commotions' and your acts 'detracts'.
    • 21 followers
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    (Original post by PoGo HoPz)
    You could call your bills 'kills', your motions 'commotions' and your acts 'detracts'.
    PRSOM.
    • 39 followers
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    :lol:
    • 14 followers
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    hell beats the other parties, count me in
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    A new party for Paddy to be leader of.
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    (Original post by thunder_chunky)
    A new party for Paddy to be leader of.
    But the Church of Militant Elvis will be devo'd!
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    I think we've got enough troll parties as it is!
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    (Original post by chiggy321)
    I think we've got enough troll parties as it is!
    That's a little unfair. There's only one socialist party.
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    I would like to join, how may I go about doing this?
Updated: July 14, 2012
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