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How much will I miss out on by going home every weekend?

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    I'm moving away to uni in September but I'm only an hour away from home by train and so I'm toying with the idea of coming home every weekend to do a shift at work and see my boyfriend and family

    The only thing worrying me is that I'll miss out on the social side of uni, I'm a mature student (I'll be 20 when I start) and I'm not much of a drinker and really don't enjoy night clubs so I probably wouldn't do that part of uni anyway.

    Is there anyone else who is or has been in a similar position to me?


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    1. If your experience is anything like mine, there will be very little 'clubbing' at the weekends. Most student nights are during the week, so going at the weekend when there's non-student pricing is rare. So you won't be avoiding the clubbing by going home at the weekend.

    2. One of my flatmates went home every weekend. She said she wished she'd spent more time at uni.

    I personally think it's a bad idea. You're obviously moving away from home/not going to your local uni for a reason, so, in my opinion, it seems silly to specifically move away and then not immerse yourself in your new home.
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    (Original post by mammamia:0)
    I'm moving away to uni in September but I'm only an hour away from home by train and so I'm toying with the idea of coming home every weekend to do a shift at work and see my boyfriend and family

    The only thing worrying me is that I'll miss out on the social side of uni, I'm a mature student (I'll be 20 when I start) and I'm not much of a drinker and really don't enjoy night clubs so I probably wouldn't do that part of uni anyway.

    Is there anyone else who is or has been in a similar position to me?


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    I know a girl who did the same and she was fully involved in the social side of things. Uni tends to be quieter on a weekend anyway because people do go home, to visit boyfriends/girlfriends elsewhere, to visit mates elsewhere etc.

    Friday or Saturday is often the big night out of the week (where I am it's Friday but I know some unis where it's the SU on a Saturday), simply because no one has lectures the next day, and the girl I know felt she missed out on doing that with everyone, but if you're not fussed about clubbing anyway it shouldn't be a problem for you.

    You academic might suffer a bit because many students just hit the library on Saturdays and Sundays as there's not much else on and you lose this opportunity being at home with distractions etc.
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    It will be impossible to get involved with some societies, particularly any that involve sport.

    Furthermore, I get a lot of work done on the weekend, but I find it very difficult to work at home, with all the distractions that it brings.
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    I think you'll regret it, maybe once a fortnight? Until you're sure of what you want to do.
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    (Original post by Origami Bullets)
    It will be impossible to get involved with some societies, particularly any that involve sport.

    Furthermore, I get a lot of work done on the weekend, but I find it very difficult to work at home, with all the distractions that it brings.
    Not sure about that, most teams I know train a few evenings as well as Sat or Sun and the main match is BUCS on a Weds.

    Admittedly you'd miss matches in local Saturday/Sunday leagues which many team sports do, but that might just mean playing in the 3s not the 2s or something rather than missing out all together.
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    (Original post by roh)
    Not sure about that, most teams I know train a few evenings as well as Sat or Sun and the main match is BUCS on a Weds.

    Admittedly you'd miss matches in local Saturday/Sunday leagues which many team sports do, but that might just mean playing in the 3s not the 2s or something rather than missing out all together.
    Due to the structuring of BUCS for many sports you'll play far more local league (weekend) matches than BUCS ones (at least that is largely my experience).
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    (Original post by Keckers)
    Due to the structuring of BUCS for many sports you'll play far more local league (weekend) matches than BUCS ones (at least that is largely my experience).
    I agree you play more local league stuff, but BUCS are the ones that are meant to be more important as you represent the uni, it goes into the overall points score and so on. I suppose it depends how seriously the university takes its overall BUCS position.
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    (Original post by roh)
    I agree you play more local league stuff, but BUCS are the ones that are meant to be more important as you represent the uni, it goes into the overall points score and so on. I suppose it depends how seriously the university takes its overall BUCS position.
    I just take the view that playing time is playing time, as long as I'm on the pitch I don't really care
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    Not too much, students go out during the week when it's cheaper.
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    Lots of people go home on weekends, but every weekend is a lot! why not get them to come and visit you every now and again if you're so close? i would say every fortnight would be right. I'm planning on seeing my boyfriend every 3 weeks and my parents... once a term! because it costs £60 a go, and £100 to my parents so they can wait!
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    (Original post by mammamia:0)
    I'm moving away to uni in September but I'm only an hour away from home by train and so I'm toying with the idea of coming home every weekend to do a shift at work and see my boyfriend and family

    The only thing worrying me is that I'll miss out on the social side of uni, I'm a mature student (I'll be 20 when I start) and I'm not much of a drinker and really don't enjoy night clubs so I probably wouldn't do that part of uni anyway.

    Is there anyone else who is or has been in a similar position to me?


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    It's not like you have to go home every weekend. Since you don't live too far away you can just decide what you want to do as the mood takes you You can still get involved in the social side of things.
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    (Original post by Keckers)
    I just take the view that playing time is playing time, as long as I'm on the pitch I don't really care
    Agreed, I just meant for the OP if she's good at sport it's more likely they'll overlook being unable to play Saturday league than being unable to play BUCS, though she may have to play a squad below or something.
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    (Original post by mammamia:0)
    I'm moving away to uni in September but I'm only an hour away from home by train and so I'm toying with the idea of coming home every weekend to do a shift at work and see my boyfriend and family

    The only thing worrying me is that I'll miss out on the social side of uni, I'm a mature student (I'll be 20 when I start) and I'm not much of a drinker and really don't enjoy night clubs so I probably wouldn't do that part of uni anyway.

    Is there anyone else who is or has been in a similar position to me?


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    My boyfriend came home every other weekend to see me. It worked out fine and our relationship is stronger than ever. He was 20 when he started to and never was much if a big drinker or one for the party scene. Although it cost a lot (4 hours worth of train journeys Friday and then same on Sunday) we found it worked well for us. Trust and communication is a BIG thing. When the work load got really heavy we wouldn't see each other for three weeks at a time, but we were in constant contact and talked through all our worries and issues.

    It isn't easy. My bf originally wanted to see me every week but the work load was too much and I didn't want to put the strain on him. You miss each other like crazy, often feel alone and isolated, but he says he hasn't suffered one bit. His friends he made instantly accepted the situation, so no one thought he was anti social or anything.

    If you feel you an do it, go for it. But it isn't for everyone and there is a lot of pain and difficulty involved.

    Hope I have helped..,although prob not haha!
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    I'd advise going home twice a month, at most. Although not much happens at weekends with regards to clubbing etc. A few people from my halls always stayed and we became better friends as a result (as there were around 6 of us rather than the full 15).
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    It's hard to go home every weekend, because you will soon find it effects your workload. I went out during the week, so that means you leave your work til the weekend. E.g Til the weekend. You'll also find that you feel like your living out of a suitcase because thats how I felt. I had to go home from sept - dec nearly every weekend and soon it really annoyed me. But try it, it might be different for you.
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    (Original post by roh)
    Not sure about that, most teams I know train a few evenings as well as Sat or Sun and the main match is BUCS on a Weds.

    Admittedly you'd miss matches in local Saturday/Sunday leagues which many team sports do, but that might just mean playing in the 3s not the 2s or something rather than missing out all together.
    I think it depends on which sport you're involved in, and at which university. However, the one that I've been involved in has about two thirds of its training, and all competitions, on weekends, and weekend training is compulsory (and training continues through the holidays!)

    Whilst I wouldn't like to say that all sports clubs are as intense as that, it will certainly limit choices in terms of which you can get involved with.
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    (Original post by Keckers)
    Due to the structuring of BUCS for many sports you'll play far more local league (weekend) matches than BUCS ones (at least that is largely my experience).
    It really depends which sport. Popular teams sports, yes. Individual sports, not so much.
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    (Original post by Origami Bullets)
    I think it depends on which sport you're involved in, and at which university. However, the one that I've been involved in has about two thirds of its training, and all competitions, on weekends, and weekend training is compulsory (and training continues through the holidays!)

    Whilst I wouldn't like to say that all sports clubs are as intense as that, it will certainly limit choices in terms of which you can get involved with.
    Rowing? Just guessing because that's partly because it's limited by daylight and the access to suitable water so weekends are kind of forced. Most you can either train inside or just under floodlights.

    True, but for most team sports games are weekdays and individual sports tend to have events only a few times a year on weekends which OP might be able to take off.
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    Maybe you could do what my sister did?
    Alternate between you and your boyfriend visiting each other every 2 weeks.
    So you'll see your family every 4 weeks when you're at home, see your boyfriend every 2 weeks and only have to go away from uni every 4 weeks so shouldn't miss out on too much.

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