[Anonymous]

I know this is stupid and I'm not looking for people to say "5'1 isn't that short really!" But for my whole life I've always been upset at the fact that I'm so short in comparison to everyone else. This feeling is exacerbated at fancy events which require heels because I only like to wear small heels, whereas lots of girls feel the need to wear 5 inchers (like they did the other day at graduation!)

One of the biggest reasons I've started to hate my height more is because one friend in particular mentions my height (supposedly innocently) a few times each meeting. Even if its things like "you're so small and cute!" (she's 5'4). I think she herself has a bit of a complex but instead of challenging her about it I'd rather just be happy in my own height, because I don't want anyone to know how insecure I am (which they'll find out if I admit that it bothers me).

Can anyone give advice on how they've gotten over--what they perceived to be- a major physical flaw?

[blueray]

Jam about girls height! If they were all so big, how would us Asian males feel? Not every guy, especially brown guys are 6ft +!!!!!

As long as you are a good person that's all that matters, I'm sure you will find someone

[Emaemmaemily]

I'm 5'2'' (just, probably a smidgin under), so I know how annoying it can be. Funnily enough, I was the tallest in my year through school until about the age of 12; I pretty much didn't grow after that.

If you're friend is upsetting you, definitely tell them. You don't have to make it seem like a big deal, try to make it light hearted, but whichever way you do it you need to let her know that you'd like her to stop.
I actually have met quite a few girls of similar height to us (about 5 of them at my new place of work, actually. 2 of them shorter than me), and they don't seem to let it bother them. It is annoying when trying to reach something high up, but people don't actually think badly of you at all. In fact, many men (and I'm making an assumption that you're a heterasexual female) like for a girl to be shorter than them, and so really wouldn't mind at all.

I suppose all I can say is that you need to get to a point where you are comfortable with yourself and how you look. Are you happy with other aspects of your appearance?

[Above.The.Empyrean]

If you can't get over your height, then you must be tall?

[ct2k7]

Accept who you are? There are plenty of people /men who'd accept you. If you were a guy, well, I'm not going to derail.


This was posted from The Student Room's iPhone/iPad App

[Anonymous]

I have the opposite problem. I'm 5'11 and my boyfriend is 5'8, it makes me feel like an unattractive giant. Everytime I go to events I have to wear flat shoes because otherwise I tower over all the other girls. I have to buy clothes in XL or 16 despite being quite boney because I have wide shoulders and hips, which makes me feel like a fat ****.

On here in these sorts of threads I always see guys saying how cute they find short girls - like they can look after them better, which makes them feel more manly. Whereas there's me towering over my poor boyfriend feeling like crap because I'm sure it bothers him (he claims it doesn't).

My height used to bother me a lot more but now I've realised that you know, I can't change it so I try to stop thinking about it. Or whenever I feel like crap I think about the good things - I don't need to ask for help to reach the top shelves, I have very long legs which look amazing in shorts. And I'm sure there are bonuses to being your height too, you need to either figure them out yourself or find a boyfriend and ask him what he likes about your height. My boyfriend has been a massive help in helping me accept my height, he loves me how I am and is always telling me that which is a massive confidence boost, you should try to find someone too.

And your friend? Tell her to STFU. Jesus I think I'd kick someone who kept going on about my height.

[Anonymous]

(Original post by Emaemmaemily)
I'm 5'2'' (just, probably a smidgin under), so I know how annoying it can be. Funnily enough, I was the tallest in my year through school until about the age of 12; I pretty much didn't grow after that.

If you're friend is upsetting you, definitely tell them. You don't have to make it seem like a big deal, try to make it light hearted, but whichever way you do it you need to let her know that you'd like her to stop.
I actually have met quite a few girls of similar height to us (about 5 of them at my new place of work, actually. 2 of them shorter than me), and they don't seem to let it bother them. It is annoying when trying to reach something high up, but people don't actually think badly of you at all. In fact, many men (and I'm making an assumption that you're a heterasexual female) like for a girl to be shorter than them, and so really wouldn't mind at all.

I suppose all I can say is that you need to get to a point where you are comfortable with yourself and how you look. Are you happy with other aspects of your appearance?

That's the thing I'm completely happy with everything else, I just hate the mentality that 'short is unattractive and everyone should be taller.' Throughout primary school I was always picked out as the shortest one in the year and even in high school one of my tall friends once said "I'd never want to be your height!" and all my other high school friends were all "I want to be taller". Literally everyone I meet who is under 5'5 wants to be taller, almost like being short is a deficiency. And I guess I've imbibed this message.

[Anonymous]

(Original post by Anonymous)
I have the opposite problem. I'm 5'11 and my boyfriend is 5'8, it makes me feel like an unattractive giant. Everytime I go to events I have to wear flat shoes because otherwise I tower over all the other girls. I have to buy clothes in XL or 16 despite being quite boney because I have wide shoulders and hips, which makes me feel like a fat ****.

On here in these sorts of threads I always see guys saying how cute they find short girls - like they can look after them better, which makes them feel more manly. Whereas there's me towering over my poor boyfriend feeling like crap because I'm sure it bothers him (he claims it doesn't).

My height used to bother me a lot more but now I've realised that you know, I can't change it so I try to stop thinking about it. Or whenever I feel like crap I think about the good things - I don't need to ask for help to reach the top shelves, I have very long legs which look amazing in shorts. And I'm sure there are bonuses to being your height too, you need to either figure them out yourself or find a boyfriend and ask him what he likes about your height. My boyfriend has been a massive help in helping me accept my height, he loves me how I am and is always telling me that which is a massive confidence boost, you should try to find someone too.

And your friend? Tell her to STFU. Jesus I think I'd kick someone who kept going on about my height.

See that's the thing- I've found many guys to be quite accepting of height, but girls are a different matter completely. They're so much more critical and actually its only girls who've made me feel bad about my height. But since my friend is nowhere near tall (5'4) I'm trying to comfort myself that she is the one with the problems not me. My tall 5'7-5'9 friends rarely mention it unless its a matter of convenience (i.e. they tower over me in pictures). I think 5'11 can be a nice height on a girl though.

[Emaemmaemily]

(Original post by Anonymous)
That's the thing I'm completely happy with everything else, I just hate the mentality that 'short is unattractive and everyone should be taller.' Throughout primary school I was always picked out as the shortest one in the year and even in high school one of my tall friends once said "I'd never want to be your height!" and all my other high school friends were all "I want to be taller". Literally everyone I meet who is under 5'5 wants to be taller, almost like being short is a deficiency. And I guess I've imbibed this message.

I've never experienced such a big "I want to be tall" thing within society myself, perhaps you've been more sensative to it. But one thing you need to realise is that people don't see short people and think "oh my god, they are so short." (It only tends to draw attention when someone is an actual dwarf or something).
It seems to be something that's in your mentality, but it's not necessarily in other people's (the people who are looking at you). You need to realise the good things about yourself, the positives of being short (guys will find it cute), and tell your friend to stop talking about it.

Bring some more confidence into your life

[lizz-ie]

(Original post by Anonymous)
I know this is stupid and I'm not looking for people to say "5'1 isn't that short really!" But for my whole life I've always been upset at the fact that I'm so short in comparison to everyone else. This feeling is exacerbated at fancy events which require heels because I only like to wear small heels, whereas lots of girls feel the need to wear 5 inchers (like they did the other day at graduation!)

One of the biggest reasons I've started to hate my height more is because one friend in particular mentions my height (supposedly innocently) a few times each meeting. Even if its things like "you're so small and cute!" (she's 5'4). I think she herself has a bit of a complex but instead of challenging her about it I'd rather just be happy in my own height, because I don't want anyone to know how insecure I am (which they'll find out if I admit that it bothers me).

Can anyone give advice on how they've gotten over--what they perceived to be- a major physical flaw?

I'm 5'1 too! And I never wear heels, I'm one of those accident prone people who would break their necks if they wore heels I just feel really short all the time because I have a lot of friend's who are at least a foot taller than me! However, being small has good aspects too, you can avoid annoying people more easily, get to the front in crowds, and fit more clothes in the drawers in your room! Just try to look on the bright side, even if you look younger than you are, it just means that you'll also look younger once you're older!


This was posted from The Student Room's iPhone/iPad App

[rugbyladosc]

(Original post by Above.The.Empyrean)
If you can't get over your height, then you must be tall?

What you did there, I see it..

[MMoor18]

to be fair tho it works both ways, I'd rather be shorter than I am, I'm 6 foot 5 quite a few of my friends are tall, was in Poland for the Euros with 6 of us the shortest being 5 foot 10, 2 were just over 6 foot, 1 6 foot 3 and 2 of us 6 foot 5. but then I have other groups of freinds that are all shorter than 6 foot and I feel freakishly tall around them.......

[Wizz09]

Thought process to get over it:

1. What's the problem? I'm short.
2. What can I do about it? Nothing.
3. Am I going to let something I can do nothing about dominate my life? No.

It's much easier said than done but the only way is accepting it and convincing yourself it doesn't matter.

Completely futile and an unnecessary source of stress to worry about something you have absolutely zero control over.

[geetar]

I know you said you're not looking for it, but...5'1 really isn't that short for a girl.

And personally, I prefer shorter girls, under 5'3 or so.

[thetobbit]

(Original post by Anonymous)
I have the opposite problem. I'm 5'11 and my boyfriend is 5'8, it makes me feel like an unattractive giant. Everytime I go to events I have to wear flat shoes because otherwise I tower over all the other girls. I have to buy clothes in XL or 16 despite being quite boney because I have wide shoulders and hips, which makes me feel like a fat ****.

On here in these sorts of threads I always see guys saying how cute they find short girls - like they can look after them better, which makes them feel more manly. Whereas there's me towering over my poor boyfriend feeling like crap because I'm sure it bothers him (he claims it doesn't).

My height used to bother me a lot more but now I've realised that you know, I can't change it so I try to stop thinking about it. Or whenever I feel like crap I think about the good things - I don't need to ask for help to reach the top shelves, I have very long legs which look amazing in shorts. And I'm sure there are bonuses to being your height too, you need to either figure them out yourself or find a boyfriend and ask him what he likes about your height. My boyfriend has been a massive help in helping me accept my height, he loves me how I am and is always telling me that which is a massive confidence boost, you should try to find someone too.

And your friend? Tell her to STFU. Jesus I think I'd kick someone who kept going on about my height.

Just date a tall guy?

I know a woman who's like 6 foot 9 so don't feel that bad haha

[Pride]

Understandable OP, but seriously, it's no big deal.

If your friend's bothering you about your height, tell her, she probably doesn't realise it's gone beyond friendly. And you'll grow to be happy with the body you have eventually! We're telling you it's fine, but I doubt you're going to immediately stop worrying about it. With time, I know you will eventually.

besides, imagine a man your height, don't you think women would be a lot more judgemental towards him?

[noma5]

Next time your friend makes a joke you should make one back, like if I stand on my tippy toes then I'm the same height as you so technically you're short too, I do that all the time

[lankan-gurl]

(Original post by blueray)
Jam about girls height! If they were all so big, how would us Asian males feel? Not every guy, especially brown guys are 6ft +!!!!!

As long as you are a good person that's all that matters, I'm sure you will find someone

I think that's really sweet A lot of guys would not say that.

[simibean]

it doesn't matter about height
think about how short Kourtney Kardashian is, only 5 foot, and she has done sort of well

I am happy with being tall

[sliceofcake]

(Original post by noma5)
Next time your friend makes a joke you should make one back, like if I stand on my tippy toes then I'm the same height as you so technically you're short too, I do that all the time

I used to try crappy jokes in retaliation because I am 5'4 and all of my friends are taller. Now I just tell them to observe the amount of ****s I give. Alas, they cannot find any...