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Did me and my mates do the right thing?

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    Went out for a few drinks with a few friends last night, walking home my best friend collapsed and was passed out.
    We couldn't put her in a taxi as she lives on her own and none of us could really stay the night with her.
    After a good 10 minutes we still couldn't wake her up so we called an ambulance.
    The ambulance came, the paramedics managed to wake her up and she was inside the ambulance for about half an hour while those of us there waited to see what they said.
    During this time we were slagging her off a bit because we didn't realise how serious it was and we were all wanting to go home etc.
    They came out and said she was awake and talking but they needed to take her in overnight as her heart rate was very fast and not slowing down.
    At this point we're all a bit worried, and we ask the paramedics should one of us come with her.
    Because we were drunk the paramedics told us no, she was in safe hands and that we should all go home and sleep it off.
    We didn't really wanna aggravate the paramedics more than we already had done with our arguing and foul language etc.
    So we all went home, I wake up about 4 hours later with a text from my friend saying shes had to have her stomach pumped, was puking up blood and a blood test found ket in her system, so her drink had been spiked.
    She's now not speaking to any of us for not coming to the hospital with her.
    I don't see what we've done wrong to warrant her to disown us, we did what we thought was the safest thing possible and we were explicitly told by paramedics that we couldn't come with her and told to go home.
    I've tried explaining this to her but she won't listen.
    So yeah, in this situation, do you think we did the right thing?
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    If they told you not to go then I wouldn't go either. You wouldn't want to potentially make the situation worse (somehow, maybe preventing them from doing what they need etcetc).

    She's probably just a little overwhelmed/scared because of her drink being spiked and taking it out on you. She'll get over it.
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    Personally I don't know if you did the right thing. I understand the paramedics wouldn't let you come, but I would have kicked up a much greater fuss and would have made them let me go with her. There is no way that I would have let her go on her own. Basically I think you will just need to give her time to deal with it, did you kick up a big fuss or did you just accept it?
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    Considering this only happened last night, I'm assuming right now she feels like utter ****.

    Wait til she recovers and I'm sure she'll get over it.
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    (Original post by Shippy)
    Went out for a few drinks with a few friends last night, walking home my best friend collapsed and was passed out.
    We couldn't put her in a taxi as she lives on her own and none of us could really stay the night with her.
    After a good 10 minutes we still couldn't wake her up so we called an ambulance.
    The ambulance came, the paramedics managed to wake her up and she was inside the ambulance for about half an hour while those of us there waited to see what they said.
    During this time we were slagging her off a bit because we didn't realise how serious it was and we were all wanting to go home etc.
    They came out and said she was awake and talking but they needed to take her in overnight as her heart rate was very fast and not slowing down.
    At this point we're all a bit worried, and we ask the paramedics should one of us come with her.
    Because we were drunk the paramedics told us no, she was in safe hands and that we should all go home and sleep it off.
    We didn't really wanna aggravate the paramedics more than we already had done with our arguing and foul language etc.
    So we all went home, I wake up about 4 hours later with a text from my friend saying shes had to have her stomach pumped, was puking up blood and a blood test found ket in her system, so her drink had been spiked.
    She's now not speaking to any of us for not coming to the hospital with her.
    I don't see what we've done wrong to warrant her to disown us, we did what we thought was the safest thing possible and we were explicitly told by paramedics that we couldn't come with her and told to go home.
    I've tried explaining this to her but she won't listen.
    So yeah, in this situation, do you think we did the right thing?

    Yes you did the right thing - she could easily have aspirated and then it would have been curtains for her - but if it were me I would send a note of apology to the ambulance crew - drunks are a pain in the arse and theirs is a difficult job
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    (Original post by Shippy)
    Went out for a few drinks with a few friends last night, walking home my best friend collapsed and was passed out.
    We couldn't put her in a taxi as she lives on her own and none of us could really stay the night with her.
    After a good 10 minutes we still couldn't wake her up so we called an ambulance.
    The ambulance came, the paramedics managed to wake her up and she was inside the ambulance for about half an hour while those of us there waited to see what they said.
    During this time we were slagging her off a bit because we didn't realise how serious it was and we were all wanting to go home etc.
    They came out and said she was awake and talking but they needed to take her in overnight as her heart rate was very fast and not slowing down.
    At this point we're all a bit worried, and we ask the paramedics should one of us come with her.
    Because we were drunk the paramedics told us no, she was in safe hands and that we should all go home and sleep it off.
    We didn't really wanna aggravate the paramedics more than we already had done with our arguing and foul language etc.
    So we all went home, I wake up about 4 hours later with a text from my friend saying shes had to have her stomach pumped, was puking up blood and a blood test found ket in her system, so her drink had been spiked.
    She's now not speaking to any of us for not coming to the hospital with her.
    I don't see what we've done wrong to warrant her to disown us, we did what we thought was the safest thing possible and we were explicitly told by paramedics that we couldn't come with her and told to go home.
    I've tried explaining this to her but she won't listen.
    So yeah, in this situation, do you think we did the right thing?
    You seem to be saying the reason the paramedics told you not to go is because they heard you slagging her off? Also, let's face it, you don't need their permission to visit your friend in hospital, though you might have to make your own way there.

    Still, you did call the ambulance in the first place.
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    What difference would you have made by being there?
    None.

    She was in the safest hands and you obviously did the right thing by calling trained professionals to help her.

    So, yes, you did the right thing.
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    (Original post by AlmostChicGeek)
    Personally I don't know if you did the right thing. I understand the paramedics wouldn't let you come, but I would have kicked up a much greater fuss and would have made them let me go with her. There is no way that I would have let her go on her own. Basically I think you will just need to give her time to deal with it, did you kick up a big fuss or did you just accept it?
    The paramedics had already had a go at us when we were arguing amongst ourselves and we just didn't wanna cause anymore hassle with them in case we aggravated them too much and prevented them from taking care of her? We were all quite drunk and probably weren't thinking clearly, a bit more sober and yeah they might have allowed it and we probably would have pushed more, but I get where you're coming from.
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    (Original post by squeakysquirrel)
    Yes you did the right thing - she could easily have aspirated and then it would have been curtains for her - but if it were me I would send a note of apology to the ambulance crew - drunks are a pain in the arse and theirs is a difficult job
    We did apologise before they went and thanked them for taking care of her before the left. I did feel quite bad for what they had to witness.
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    (Original post by Hopple)
    You seem to be saying the reason the paramedics told you not to go is because they heard you slagging her off? Also, let's face it, you don't need their permission to visit your friend in hospital, though you might have to make your own way there.

    Still, you did call the ambulance in the first place.
    No the paramedics wouldn't let us come because they said we were too drunk and needed to go home and sleep it off.
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    (Original post by Shippy)
    The paramedics had already had a go at us when we were arguing amongst ourselves and we just didn't wanna cause anymore hassle with them in case we aggravated them too much and prevented them from taking care of her? We were all quite drunk and probably weren't thinking clearly, a bit more sober and yeah they might have allowed it and we probably would have pushed more, but I get where you're coming from.
    Do you mean that they would have refused to treat her, or you may have made it more difficult to treat her if one of you was in the ambulance with her?

    Regardless, I still think one of you should have just demanded to go with her - promised you would behave, and explain to them that it is likely she would be upset to wake up in hospital on their own. A very reasonable demand IMO.

    Either way nothing can be done now, I'm sure she will get over it eventually, and I'm glad you can see why she may be hurt by it. Good luck!
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    (Original post by Shippy)
    No the paramedics wouldn't let us come because they said we were too drunk and needed to go home and sleep it off.
    Of course it's better for you to go home and sleep it off, but the reason they didn't want you coming with her was because you'd been slagging her off. I'm sure if you'd been frantically worrying about her they'd have brought you along.
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    (Original post by Shippy)
    No the paramedics wouldn't let us come because they said we were too drunk and needed to go home and sleep it off.
    Keep telling her that. Either way, I'm sure she'll calm down and besides it could have been much worse for her if you guys had not called the ambulance in the first place.
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    (Original post by AlmostChicGeek)
    Do you mean that they would have refused to treat her, or you may have made it more difficult to treat her if one of you was in the ambulance with her?

    Regardless, I still think one of you should have just demanded to go with her - promised you would behave, and explain to them that it is likely she would be upset to wake up in hospital on their own. A very reasonable demand IMO.

    Either way nothing can be done now, I'm sure she will get over it eventually, and I'm glad you can see why she may be hurt by it. Good luck!
    I think they were concerned we would get in their way if one of us was there, because we were acting like prats, and I do regret that. Her other best friend did get very upset when they were taking her but i'm not sure whether she demanded to go with her or not, but a very valid point. It can't have hurt to put up a bit more of a fight.
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    (Original post by Hopple)
    Of course it's better for you to go home and sleep it off, but the reason they didn't want you coming with her was because you'd been slagging her off. I'm sure if you'd been frantically worrying about her they'd have brought you along.
    The paramedics explicitly said we couldn't go because we were drunk and they told us to go home though? Obviously we were worried, one of our friends broke down crying when they said they were taking her to hospital. If we weren't worried at all, then we wouldn't have rang an ambulance? Also, I don't think acting frantic in that situation where alcohol is involved would have aided our case at all, at the time we felt this was the best option. We all slag our mates off every now and then and now I realise she was very ill in hospital, all I want is for her to get better and look after herself.
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    (Original post by Shippy)
    I think they were concerned we would get in their way if one of us was there, because we were acting like prats, and I do regret that. Her other best friend did get very upset when they were taking her but i'm not sure whether she demanded to go with her or not, but a very valid point. It can't have hurt to put up a bit more of a fight.
    Yeah :/. Anyway, at least you can see that now! Just apologise, and tell her you did what you thought was right at the time, and you were all drunk so maybe didn't make the best call. That is all you can do, and perhaps promise that in the future it will never happen again. Just give her time to accept what happen and hopefully accept your apology! Good luck!
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    (Original post by Shippy)
    The paramedics explicitly said we couldn't go because we were drunk and they told us to go home though? Obviously we were worried, one of our friends broke down crying when they said they were taking her to hospital. If we weren't worried at all, then we wouldn't have rang an ambulance? Also, I don't think acting frantic in that situation where alcohol is involved would have aided our case at all, at the time we felt this was the best option. We all slag our mates off every now and then and now I realise she was very ill in hospital, all I want is for her to get better and look after herself.
    I'm not saying you didn't care, I already pointed out that you calling the ambulance ought to count on your favour. However, there's nothing stopping you from getting a taxi to the hospital if you can't go in the ambulance.
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    Wait till it simmers down, she will see reason soon enough.
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    I would definitely want to be there for my friend, but if the paramedics told you not to because you were intoxicated it's better to listen to them. There's nothing worse than drunk people making paramedic's jobs even harder by kicking up a fuss.
    You did the right thing in listening. If you explain this to you friend, adding that you were really worried about her all night and you wished you could have come, I'm sure she'll realise that you didn't choose to leave her dealing with it by herself. Go an visit her, talk to her about it. She's probably quite scared and shaken up about someone spiking her drink to be honest, so it could be affecting her emotions even more.
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    Not much you can do if you were really pissed tbh. Maybe the least drunk of you should have gone down with her or made your own way there.

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