[Anonymous]

What I mean is, do relationships necessarily start after a few dates? I am seeing a girl and I feel like it would be wrong to "make a move" now. Not because I am afraid - more because I feel it would fail, but that it could work if I gave it more time. We are both quite shy, and also quite sceptic of relationships in general... Could it work if I leave it time so we both feel more "comfortable" with the idea, or would that automatically put me in the so-called "friendzone"?

[forgetamine]

Definitely give it more time if you're not ready yet. A lot of people go into relationships too early and it doesn't work out. Wait until you really feel like you want to be with her and you think it could really work out. Maybe you just need to get to know each other a little bit more and just enjoy the time you are spending together.

[Classical Liberal]

(Original post by Anonymous)
What I mean is, do relationships necessarily start after a few dates? I am seeing a girl and I feel like it would be wrong to "make a move" now. Not because I am afraid - more because I feel it would fail, but that it could work if I gave it more time. We are both quite shy, and also quite sceptic of relationships in general... Could it work if I leave it time so we both feel more "comfortable" with the idea, or would that automatically put me in the so-called "friendzone"?

In all probability, completely the wrong approach.

The general rule is beyond being friends/aquantainces, the longer you leave it, firstly the less likely you are to ask and secondly the less likely she is to say yes. Once you have a friendship with a girl (which is not a sin) then the girl will want to protect that relationship rather than risk it.

Unless you are a really good flirt and great around girls (which you are probably not because you are "shy") or really attractive (which most guys are not) then you will in all probability put yourself in the friendzone if you spend a long time getting "comfortable".

Just ask her out god dammit. You can get more comfortable once she is your's and you are her's. It's not like you are getting engaged.

Don't think you can get a girl to fall in love with you by being her friend, it never seems to work.

[Classical Liberal]

(Original post by forgetamine)
Definitely give it more time if you're not ready yet. A lot of people go into relationships too early and it doesn't work out. Wait until you really feel like you want to be with her and you think it could really work out. Maybe you just need to get to know each other a little bit more and just enjoy the time you are spending together.

Horrendus advice.

So what if a relationship does not work out in the end? What is so bad with going out with somebody and then deciding, mehhh if it does not work, no big deal. You should expect relationships to ultimately come to and end.

It is definitely more the case that people do not go into relationships soon enough and thus it does not work out in the end.

[ViceVersa]

Definitely doesn't have to start that early. Whenever you feel sure and feel right is when I'd say go into one.

[jayjamine]

Just make sure you don't take it too slow! I've been meeting up with this guy for over 7 months now, he's shy, I'm shy. And the longer the issue is left the more confused we are.. I have no idea where it's going. I try to block him out sometimes but I just doooon't know! Make it clear you like her so she don't get bored or think you don't want a relationship with her