[Emaemmaemily]

No I don't, or I try not to. I probably judge them more on if they happened to look unwashed (or their child did), or other aspects about them as mothers rather than simply their age.

I've noticed this myself when I've looked after my neices and nephews on different occasions. There's a bit of an age gap between my and my older siblings so they are married with children, and I know I've received "looks" when I've been babysitting and alike.

[Jabberwox]

I don't look down on them but I disapprove if their intention was purely for getting benefits, a house, etc. and for superficial reasons like dressing the baby up and uploading a gazillion photos of their child on Facebook and changing their employment section to 'Full Time Yummy Mummy' which appears to be a trend nowadays.

If they are genuinely good parents and give the child a loving and stable home then no.

[gozatron]

No, they have a hard enough life as it is without me making it worse.

[emilie18]

Some teenage girls have babies just to recieve benefits and free housing, which I find despicable. However, you also have to think about the upbringing of these girls - they aren't born with this kind of attitude, so somewhere along the line it must have been taught to them, by their mothers or by society. So whilst I find it horrible, I think it's also a really clear sign that something is wrong, which we need to put right to lower our rate of teenage pregnancy.

I think people look down on teenage mothers because they assume they are all as described above, having kids young to gain access to benefits etc. However, they're not all like that. I know a few girls, who through no fault of their own (contraception failure) became pregnant and are now amazing mothers. So I think it's a shame people generalise. Not all teenagers make bad mothers - FAR from it.

[amyelizabeth2681]

(Original post by ROYP)
so obvious that you didn't need to state the joke, but you felt it was still obscure enough that you would alert us to the presence of the joke?

either way I don't see it

I'm just as confused as you are, but hey ho

[amyelizabeth2681]

(Original post by . . .)
I went into mothercare to buy a present for my newborn cousin the amount of stares and wtf faces you get is unbelievable.

It happens, probably more often than we think. Hell, some people may not even realise they do it. After all, what is the perception of teenage mothers? That they're pregnant just to receive benefits and a council house and the stereotype has to come from somewhere, but it's sad that a lot seem to make such sweeping generalisations.

[amyelizabeth2681]

(Original post by ChloeElizabeth)
I think it is because if you have a child that young then you are housed under the local authority which of course is discounted. It is easier to get said housing being single so the child is likely to be from a 'broken home' which can be damaging. It is seen as cheating, when other people work hard to be able to afford to move out from their parents house but if you have a kid young then you get it for free.

And let's be honest, it's usually by accident, the parents aren't gonna be married in the majority of cases. This is what people object to, an assumption of all the above applying to said teenage mother.


This was posted from The Student Room's iPhone/iPad App

This is true, and for people who abuse the system, it isn't fair. I'm just curious as to how much background, education and society has to do with it. After all, it's not a coincidence that the majority of teenage pregnancies come from mother's who's own mother's had them when THEY were teenagers, come from deprived backgrounds coupled with a poor education. That's certainly not the case for everyone, but it plays a part for a huge number of them. Yes people aren't tied to their fate, but I guess my initial question was just to see if people took this into consideration when we do judge them.

I'm not saying its right and I think these young women should perhaps aspire to do more with their lives before having children, but if its what they see others around them doing and their own mothers did it, in a way it seems like a case of ignorance more than anything, and that is sad indeed.

[koko298]

No. I look up on them. They have the courage to keep their baby.

[amyelizabeth2681]

(Original post by Millie228)
I look down on teenage fathers as well.

It's interesting because you seem to be the only one who's brought this point up. So I guess this brings up another question: As a society, why is it that we look down (well, some do anyway) on the teenage mum on the bus with the pram, but we don't seem to judge the teenage father. If anything, it seems we applaud him when we see him walking around with the kids and the pram. It shows he's "stepping up", however surely this should be expected. Why do we applaud one and judge the other? (or so it seems to me anyway, maybe I'm the only one that thinks this and I'm way off base here) After all, it took both of them to make the child.

[aspirinpharmacist]

I feel sorry for them, but I think it's awful that teenage mothers get judged all the time for becoming pregnant when half of their peers have had abortions. Takes a lot of courage either way, but I kind of admire the girls who decide to keep their baby. I wouldn't give them dirty looks or anything because I'm sure they already get enough of that. Besides, some women look younger than they are, they might actually be in their mid twenties. And to anyone who thinks teenage pregnancy is some kind of new and terrible epidemic, actually, it's been the norm for centuries. Girls would marry fairly young, about 16/17 in some cases, and they'd be expected to produce a child within the first year of marriage. Just because these teenage mothers aren't married to the dads, doesn't make the whole teenage pregnancy thing a new development.

[Xotol]

I would never look down on a teenage mother, regardless of their situation. Even if they are benefit cheats or similar, I would instead question the environment they were raised in - after all, they are rarely of the age and maturity required to make the best informed decisions on behalf of the baby and themselves. They are shaped by their upbringing, which is generally why a lot of teenage mothers come from deprived neighbourhoods.

(Original post by amyelizabeth2681)
It happens, probably more often than we think. Hell, some people may not even realise they do it. After all, what is the perception of teenage mothers? That they're pregnant just to receive benefits and a council house and the stereotype has to come from somewhere, but it's sad that a lot seem to make such sweeping generalisations.

I suppose it's based on the stereotype that teenage mothers are 'sluts' and basically whore themselves around when there is no precedent to assume that this is the case for all of them. They're usually an easy target in this society - and it's even easier to blame and ridicule them when there's such an outrage over benefits cheating. When an average person sees a young teenager with a pram, not particularly dressed smartly, it's easy to assume a lot of things. Raising awareness should be key in trying to fix this issue.

[amyelizabeth2681]

(Original post by Xotol)
I would never look down on a teenage mother, regardless of their situation. Even if they are benefit cheats or similar, I would instead question the environment they were raised in - after all, they are rarely of the age and maturity required to make the best informed decisions on behalf of the baby and themselves. They are shaped by their upbringing, which is generally why a lot of teenage mothers come from deprived neighbourhoods.



I suppose it's based on the stereotype that teenage mothers are 'sluts' and basically whore themselves around when there is no precedent to assume that this is the case for all of them. They're usually an easy target in this society - and it's even easier to blame and ridicule them when there's such an outrage over benefits cheating. When an average person sees a young teenager with a pram, not particularly dressed smartly, it's easy to assume a lot of things. Raising awareness should be key in trying to fix this issue.

It's just perplexing to me I guess why this is. Personally, I believe the media along with politics has a lot to do with it. Of course young teenage mothers are easy to demonise within a society. Young people are statistically less likely to vote than any other age group, so no repercussions from a political stand point I suppose. The media is dominated by sensationalist stories and I guess it makes people feel good to look down upon someone by justifying it and calling them benefit cheats. What a lot of people don't know is that tax evasion costs the treasury 15 times more than benefits fraud and that only 1% of benefits claimed are actually claimed fraudulently (this is including EVERYBODY, not just teenage mothers). The only reason we've even heard about tax evasion lately is because of the Jimmy Carr fiasco a few weeks back and even now people have forgotten about it, because the media itself has moved on.

However, what is sad is that we also have the highest rate of teenage pregnancy in Europe and it doesn't seem like anyone wants to tackle the issue. This along with the rifts growing between the distribution of wealth and income within the UK, where does that leave them? Again, I find it very sad.

[AdvanceAndVanquish]

(Original post by Minotauro)
No, not really.
But when I see mothers smoking whilst pushing prams Now that **** pisses me off

I walked by a mother smoking weed and blowing smoke in the face of her baby at a bus shelter.

[WillowLeaves]

I think the reason people look down on teenage mums is because having a baby is a life-long commitment but they are too young to fully appreciate how that will affect their life, which will be bad for the child. Similarly, when teenagers get married, a lot of people assume they're too young to understand what it means and they'll change their minds soon. That's my line of thinking anyway.


This was posted from The Student Room's iPhone/iPad App

[Minotauro]

(Original post by AdvanceAndVanquish)
I walked by a mother smoking weed and blowing smoke in the face of her baby at a bus shelter.

That's horrifying
Her child should be taken away from her

[boba]

I don't look down on them but sometimes when I see someone who looks around my age with a baby I imagine having one. It horrifies me. which in turn leads me to feel sorry for them, even though I have no idea if the sympathy is even warranted since its just projecting my own feelings onto them for all I know they could be perfectly happy.

so although I don't look down on them I think my response is just as illogical and presumptuous really

[megan.c]

I only judge them if they don't look after their child properly or palm them off on other people (unless they do this in order to work or study). If I saw another 19 year old with a kid, which happens a lot when I visit my boyfriends teen pregnancy ridden town, and they both look happy and well fed and clothed then I have no reason to judge.

In most cases I'll just look at the kid and go "AWWWW BABY!" anyway xD

[philistine]

Absolutely.

I don't think there are statistics for the claim I'm about to make, though I'd bet dollars to doughnuts that nineteen out of twenty women who fall pregnant whilst still in their teenage years, do so due to thoughtlessness, a lack of understanding of what serious business a child is, and a sore inconsideration of the financial burden which a child would surely be.

[Florrick]

Not really no.


It's quite a rare sight. Where I live, there are people who look around my parent's age that have having really young kids. I get a bit weirded out by that.

[amyelizabeth2681]

(Original post by boba)
I don't look down on them but sometimes when I see someone who looks around my age with a baby I imagine having one. It horrifies me. which in turn leads me to feel sorry for them, even though I have no idea if the sympathy is even warranted since its just projecting my own feelings onto them for all I know they could be perfectly happy.

so although I don't look down on them I think my response is just as illogical and presumptuous really

Well this is what's interesting, this is something a lot seem to have a knee jerk reaction to. Mine to be fair is probably extremely akin to yours, I try putting myself in their shoes and I'm terrified by it. It's because its a responsibility which seems rather daunting and something which would change my life dramatically. However, that's when I start asking myself why it is that these women are any different than me, or hell, any of us who are posting on this thread without children. If you look at it the majority of us are most likely sexually active, so what makes them so different? I know it's an obvious question but when you start asking exactly WHY (not just the how) then that's what bothers me the most.