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Do you look down on teenage mothers?

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Become part of the Welcome Squad! Apply here! 28-10-2014
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    The thing that most people forget though, in reality it's pretty hard to get pregnant.. There's only a couple days in the month where you're actually fertile, and then one in four pregnancies fails... And even if contraception fails the morning after pill is widely available and free. So statistically speaking it's unlikely that these girls get pregnant through no fault of their own. The most likely scenario is they have consistently been having unprotected sex, then got pregnant. They may call it an "accidental pregnancy" but in my eyes that's not an accident.

    So, therefore they either did it on purpose when they can't afford it (no sense of social responsibility, and will get the stigma attached to that) or they did it because they have such a lack of education. I know that when I was 14 a lot of girls believed that if you did the guy *a favour* before sex then you couldn't get pregnant. Lol.


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    I don't automatically 'look down' on them, no.

    I'm more concerned about the welfare of the child, so if the child is being cared for and loved in a safe environment I don't have a reason to make any sort of negative assumptions towards them.
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    No.
    I know several girls who have babies and their children are so loved, and so happy.

    Yes some teen mums are bad mums, but so are some mums in their twenties and thirties.
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    I actually wrote a blog post on this topic.

    I don't 'look down' on young mothers. I know a few young women who have wanted nothing besides having children and though there is nothing wrong with that, they have not worked to provide and support their child. Perhaps it comes down to the way I was raised, my mum has instilled in me the practice of prioritisation: I will not have children until I can provide for them the way a parent should. That is not to say that a teenage mother is unable to provide for her child(ren), she may well have a familial support network and be able to have a job in order to do that.

    I make an effort not to judge anybody. The only problem I have is people who have children in order to access more state benefits than they would otherwise be entitled to. Of course, you cannot always ascertain whether this is or is not the case just by seeing someone in the street.

    Just my thoughts. Feel free to check out my blog at http://www.thelifeandtimesofthetypho...r.blogspot.com
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    I don't look down on mothers because they're teenagers, that isn't the issue. I have a couple of friends who had babies very young (one ridiculously young- 13) and they're so different that you can't put them in the same category. As much as I would never recommend a 13 year old having a baby, my friend who had her daughter at 13 is actually one of the most amazing parents I know. She stayed in school with the help of child minders/nurseries, got her GCSEs and A Levels, and then by the time she'd done those her child was school aged so she got a job as a classroom assistant. She's never touched benefits (not that I begrudge people getting help, but there is always that teen mum stereotype) and her child is the happiest little girl you could possibly see. Her Mum helped her a lot, but I don't think that's something that's specific to teen Mums in the modern world. My grandparents looked after me a lot when I was younger, and my Mum was 26 when she had me.

    On the other hand, another person I know of (not a friend as such) had her baby when she was 20, which isn't even teen, and she couldn't be more horrific as a parent. No intention of getting a job, she smokes drugs while her child is with her, palms him off whenever she possibly can, and doesn't seem to care all that much about him.

    Fair enough, the 13 year old could have done with waiting a while and living her life a little, but at the end of the day she coped with her circumstances and rose to the challenge. I don't know whether she regrets having a baby so young, she must to some extent, but that child has wanted for nothing and I admire her for that. I wouldn't say that I "look down" on the 20 year old; it's more that I feel sorry for her that she hasn't got the help she needs to be a good Mum.

    The point I'm trying to make is that while teen pregnancies aren't the ideal scenario, you can't say that just because somebody is in their teens they're going to be worse as a parent than someone who's older.
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    (Original post by ChloeElizabeth)
    The thing that most people forget though, in reality it's pretty hard to get pregnant.. There's only a couple days in the month where you're actually fertile, and then one in four pregnancies fails... And even if contraception fails the morning after pill is widely available and free. So statistically speaking it's unlikely that these girls get pregnant through no fault of their own. The most likely scenario is they have consistently been having unprotected sex, then got pregnant. They may call it an "accidental pregnancy" but in my eyes that's not an accident.

    So, therefore they either did it on purpose when they can't afford it (no sense of social responsibility, and will get the stigma attached to that) or they did it because they have such a lack of education. I know that when I was 14 a lot of girls believed that if you did the guy *a favour* before sex then you couldn't get pregnant. Lol.


    This was posted from The Student Room's iPhone/iPad App
    you do realise that despite how low how the probability is that people do everything right (use contraception, go for the morning after pill if it fails ect) the size of the population still means that there will be plenty of people that it happens to. You also only know that your contraception fails if its a condom people who are using hormonal contraception have no indication that it fails until they find out they are pregnant so how would they get the morning after pill?
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    I know quite a few who are so I don't judge, I'd only look down on teenage mothers who didn't act like mothers
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    (Original post by ufo2012)
    That is no excuse!
    I disagree

    I come from a town in which most people are Jeremy Kyle celebrities

    and the reason is this, children are brought up in quite a rough environment, parents on benefits, who dont spend time with their kids. children think they can do what they want, so education is the least priority. child messes up in school, decides to look "pretty" i.e. slutty, gets attention, end us sleeping with them. no good role models and as this is what everyone is doing, why not. TADAHH, and this cycle continues.
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    (Original post by ipoop)
    Have you been to a majority or in fact any African country to back up your argument?
    Yes, malawi and nigeria etc. My friends family live there.
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    (Original post by blueray)
    Yes, malawi and nigeria etc. My friends family live there.
    Right, well I can tell you that it's not "the norm" from my neck of the woods.
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    (Original post by ipoop)
    Right, well I can tell you that it's not "the norm" from my neck of the woods.
    Yes it is! Shall we book a ticket and I'll show you right now.
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    It depends what you mean when you say teenage.


    Under 16? Yes - to some extent, anyway. I don't think they will have all thought it through properly but that doesn't mean they're bad mothers. I just think it would have been wiser to wait until they were at least a little older.

    16-19? No. Three of my closest four female friends in high school were all teen mothers. As was my own mother. None of them had education or career goals and they had already decided to leave education before they got pregnant.
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    No, of course not. It's not a situation I'd personally want to be in, but at the end of the day it's their choice and as long as they're taking care of the child it doesn't matter. Some teenage mums are probably dreadful, but so are some adult mums.
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    no i dont look down at them, though i can understand the stigma over it.

    teenage mothers are essentially older children looking after younger children. dont get me wrong, there can be very responsible young mums...perhaps better than actual middle aged ones...but this isnt necessarily the case for the majority, despite my lack of evidence proving such. raising a kid and making sure it stays alive are two different things.

    our views can change as we grow older... we could say that growing up, all our parents do is limit up from doing crap, but once we get older (emphasis on older) and get our own kids, we can understand why they have done this, what the point of it was... having a kid while youre still a kid could mean you dont raise your kid right despite having pure/honest intentions...

    if anyone has a kid here, i dont blame you, but i urge you, please... please think about your babies welfare and how it will be raised... take the second paragraph of this post into consideration, this ignorance can potentially be bad because people dont want to admit their views are 'potentially' flawed due to their age... there will be things you think are stupid but arents.... seek as much advice from adults (not friends and such) as possible. teach your kids compassion, morality, and ethical stands. theres also the matter of getting a job to make sure you can actually raise them...good luck to them

    i generally have the same view regarding getting married young... i wont look down on you, but remember the second paragraph...
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    (Original post by ipoop)
    Have you been to a majority or in fact any African country to back up your argument?


    (Original post by blueray)
    Yes, malawi and nigeria etc. My friends family live there.

    Boom!
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    (Original post by FO12DY)




    Boom!
    :lolwut:??
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    No because it all depends on the situation doesn't it.
    Saying you look down on all teenage mothers is just as stupid as saying you look down on everyone on benefits.
    It all depends on the exact specifics of the case and situation.
    You cannot judge based on the simple fact they are a teenage mother.
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    (Original post by blueray)
    :lolwut:??
    Just highlighting your response there, which I rather enjoyed.
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    (Original post by FO12DY)
    Just highlighting your response there, which I rather enjoyed.
    Oh haha thanks
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    (Original post by cid)
    Only when she's on her knees


    eh? eh?



    ....Your all going to neg me aren't you.
    Yes.

    (You're*)

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