[RtGOAT]

You're probably just really ugly.

[JamesNeedHelp2]

(Original post by RtGOAT)
You're probably just really ugly.

Harsh.

[ihaveyourcat]

(Original post by Anonymous)
Yeah, thanks for the message. I know there is more to me than my nose, the difficulty is convincing girls that there is. Often a girl will just reject men on basis of looks, which doesn't give you a chance to show them there is more to me. But I guess, this helps filter out the shallow girls. Its annoying to think that I would feel much better about myself and have had a different life with a lot more girlfriends etc if my nose was more normal, its like one of the few things you can't actually fix.

I try not to think about girls, just obv with a high sex drive, where I masturbate like twice a day and a man in his peak, its difficult not to. I know we're our own worst critics, but yeah my nose is pretty bad, well its doesn't suit me anyway. I know a lot of men have bigger noses and still look good like David Gandy and still look good but I guess I need to accept it, I guess part of me is wondering what life would have been like and what it has actually been like if that makes sense?

Well I'm a girl and I can tell you that we're definately not all like that! (although there are a lot of shallow girls out there). No that definately makes sense but you'll drive yourself crazy if you keep thinking about "what ifs" and mourning over what could have been. Without seeing a pic I couldn't say for definate but I'm sure your nose suits you just fine - you just need a little bit of self confidence

[Anonymous]

(Original post by Dinnes)
It's quite easy to say 'I'm confident', but you have you genuinely be happy with who *you* are, because whatever life throws at you you aren't going to be given a new body and you have to make the best of what you've got. There are women out there who also doubt how good looking they are, and it is a dead cert that there are people out there who are even less looking that you perceive yourself to be.

If it's any consolation my brother has pretty much the same criticisms of himself and he has just had a great relationship of about 9 months. People who factor a whole relationship, one that actually lasts, on good looks and initial attractions are going to disappointed.

What you must focus on is being happy with yourself. Ignore what anyone else says - get out and do everything that you like doing, whether it's sport, music, or whatever. Through that you will have a good time, and meet people. If you see people as possible friends rather than possible relationships then things will get much easier.

You even admit yourself that you have terrible self esteem. So your looks are not an issue. Because there will be people less attractive than you. Enjoy being who you are and enjoy stuff that you do. Because through that you will gain confidence and then life will be your oyster.

Sorry, that was probably rubbish, but if it made any sense then please take my advice.

Hope it all goes well,

Dan

Thanks Dan, think you're right, I do have low self esteem really due to my nose but I think I really need to just distract myself as people have worse problems

[Anonymous]

(Original post by RtGOAT)
You're probably just really ugly.

Well I have never been told Im ugly, only been told Im handsome by one or two girls though but one or two have commented on my nose

[Dinnes]

(Original post by Anonymous)
Thanks Dan, think you're right, I do have low self esteem really due to my nose but I think I really need to just distract myself as people have worse problems

You need to not ignore, it, but accept it. By no means should you go round on a nasal pride day, :P , but people won't judge you for it. At least, they won't judge you more than anyone else, because everyone has something unappealing about them. Whether it's aesthetic or character based there *will* be an issue.

But yeah, find a hobby and get out there and do something fun that you enjoy Make sure you do some regular exercise a few times a week, even just the odd walk is good and it will make you feel so much better about yourself. I recently completely lost it with a friend (completely unlike me, never really done it before). Went for a walk, and even though I still wanted to kill him it was at least in less violent ways and I did feel better :P

So yeah Carpe diem eh?

[Oh I Really Don't Care]

Hello.

Please talk to me if you need to.

I also suffered from BD during my teenage years and for all of my time at my (first) uni. I just want you to know that you're not alone.

First thing first; women aren't attracted to a man who is confident. They will see a man on that basis but confidence does not get you a girlfriend. To get a girlfriend you need to be happy with yourself and therefore it is important you manage this.

Secondly, while not having a girlfriend ever is going to play awful tricks on you, I can assure that 1 or 20 girlfriends - or zero - girlfriends does not change the way you think of yourself. There isn't a final destination where "everything is just right" or "if I had a girlfriend xyz", or "I'm too old and have no experience" - let me tell you that no experience is required. It's not difficult ... just let events unfold as if it was a normal relationship between friends with the added V amenities of sex.

The 'good looking' guys you seem to mention aren't super human; just happy with themselves. It doesn't mean they are happy or have perfect lives.

[Anonymous]

(Original post by Oh I Really Don't Care)
Hello.

Please talk to me if you need to.

I also suffered from BD during my teenage years and for all of my time at my (first) uni. I just want you to know that you're not alone.

First thing first; women aren't attracted to a man who is confident. They will see a man on that basis but confidence does not get you a girlfriend. To get a girlfriend you need to be happy with yourself and therefore it is important you manage this.

Secondly, while not having a girlfriend ever is going to play awful tricks on you, I can assure that 1 or 20 girlfriends - or zero - girlfriends does not change the way you think of yourself. There isn't a final destination where "everything is just right" or "if I had a girlfriend xyz", or "I'm too old and have no experience" - let me tell you that no experience is required. It's not difficult ... just let events unfold as if it was a normal relationship between friends with the added V amenities of sex.

The 'good looking' guys you seem to mention aren't super human; just happy with themselves. It doesn't mean they are happy or have perfect lives.

You speak a lot of sense, I guess good looking guys are happy with themselves as they are happy about the way they look, obv this doesn't extend to the rest of their lives though necessarily.