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Were my parents fair to do this regarding accommodation?

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Applying to Uni? Let Universities come to you. Click here to get your perfect place 20-10-2014
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    (Original post by boba)
    I don't think its unfair of him it is quite a big thing to ask. My parents definitely wouldn't do it. Heck I got a phone contract in my dads name when I was 17 and he refused to get a 24month one which would of been cheaper for me and insisted I got a 12 month one so when I was 18 I could go take one out in my own name. Then every single month got all stressed with me and demanded proof that I had been paying it because if I wasn't it was all in his name and he was liable.
    A phone contract is a little different to getting a house at uni!

    (Original post by boba)
    Now while you may be perfectly capable of paying and responsible enough to do so and wouldn't put him in any bad situation it is one thing to know that yourself and another for him to believe it. You can prove to him you have the money but he might not belive you will be responsible with it and not just go out and blow it or something.
    If as a parent you think your child will just blow the money and leave you with the bill, then I suggest you probably have more issues than just being a guarantor.

    (Original post by boba)
    Alternatively he might have poor credit history/ debts or other things that could cause problems trying to be your guarantor and he doesn't want to deal with it.
    If you as a parent are in that situation then just be honest. Rather than just being a bit of an idiot about it.

    (Original post by boba)
    Landlords that don't ask for guarantors definitely exist. My contract with one started in July :P . You have time to keep looking, and whilst it might be better if your dad just agreed to sign for this one it doesn't seem like he will so I think your best option is to look for a house that doesn't ask for one.
    They do exist. But in my experience, and in the experience of people I know, they are few and far between.
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    The university have to provide you with a place to stay if you can't commute. Or so i was told.

    Your parents sound harsh... but mine were the same with my sister... She had to ask her boyfriend's mum to be the guarantor, and i am going to have exactly the same problem when i need a place in year 2. Hopefully i get halls this year or i am ****ed

    can you not stay on someone's sofa or a B&B until you find a place? apparently a lot of people stay in halls, hate it and then need to move out asap. You could move in with one of those people?
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    (Original post by WelshBluebird)
    A phone contract is a little different to getting a house at uni!
    yes its a lot smaller of a commitment!

    (Original post by WelshBluebird)
    If as a parent you think your child will just blow the money and leave you with the bill, then I suggest you probably have more issues than just being a guarantor.
    there is a difference between thinking they will and not having any guarantee that they wont. And honestly so many people I know at uni are so irresponsible with their money it seems like a fairly sensible concern. Simply making the statement that if that is a worry you have "more issues that just being a gaurantor" solves nothing the fact still remains that many people are irresponsible with money.


    (Original post by WelshBluebird)
    If you as a parent are in that situation then just be honest. Rather than just being a bit of an idiot about it.
    many people are very private about their finances. And while yes I would just tell the person that was the reason that doesn't mean I would expect everyone to have the same attitude to sharing financial information as I do.

    (Original post by WelshBluebird)
    They do exist. But in my experience, and in the experience of people I know, they are few and far between.
    well in my experience it was really easy to find one. I didn't struggle at all,(which is probably a really good thing since the rest of my friends parents would of happily signed with no worries). Me and my friends only viewed houses from three different land lords but non of them required one.
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    (Original post by WelshBluebird)
    But even for "other" housing, when they see you are a student, you will probably be asked for a guarantor. Even non students are often asked for one (its more of a young person thing than a student thing).

    You assume that is possible though. Quite often it isn't.

    Hardly. Once again, nearly all landlords require a guarantor for a student tenant. I don't know how I can make that clearer to you.

    I just don't see why you would refuse. The bullcrap someone posted about being liable for fires is exactly that - bullcrap. You would only have to pay a penny if the son / daughter cannot pay their rent. If you are that worried about them not paying their rent, then why not be a guarantor on the proviso that you monitor their finances or something? You are causing your son / daughter a lot of aggro for no reason at all.
    Once again though it is possible, some may ask for a guarantor but equally some wont and that is the point... there are other options.

    I never mentioned fires though, i'd personally be concerned about being liable for £100+ a week, not all parents are in a position to afford that are they? lets be honest students are hardly the best people to trust with their finances and baring in mind the student loan doesnt always even cover the cost of housing let alone other expenses its perfectly reasonable to be concerned that theyd default on their rent and how exactly do you propose they moniter their finances? Trust the fruit of their loins to be entirely honest about the debt theyre racking up? Whilst some kids are perfectly trustworthy with their finances and being honest about them others arent and depending the person/parents i fail to see why they should take on a potentially crippling liability on the proviso of little more than a pinky swear...
    They may well be doing that but on that what about later life, you cant be there at every juncture in their lives to cover their rear can you? Life isnt easy and people have got to learn that their wont always be someone to potentially bail them out if it comes to the crunch, especially if [as i said before] the parents cant even afford to...
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    (Original post by olympicdude)
    I need to find a place to live for university next year. I have been on a gap year and I have to choose off campus. I found two great places but the agencies needed guarantors from my parents. A guarantor is a person who pays for the rent if I can't pay it so my parents would pay if I can't pay.

    My parents point blanc refused to be guarantors and they said they wouldn't be persuaded. I am very careful with money, I have quite a lot of money saved up and I could pay the rent several times over, that's how much money I have saved up. Even so, my parents refuse.

    Term is about a month from starting. I haven't found a place to live and I could end up with nowhere or a ****ty place in a poor location at best, never having met the people or even looked at the place beforehand. Were my parents fair to do this?
    Thats pretty tough - I dont know of a student letting agency that doesnt require guarantor agreements for students. What I would say that my uni (I think) will be a guarantor in limited circumstances so you should get in touch with your Uni's welfare advisor/accommodation office to see what they can do to help.

    Will the agencies not allow you to simply pay it all upfront?
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    (Original post by cl_steele)
    Once again though it is possible, some may ask for a guarantor but equally some wont and that is the point... there are other options.
    But the other options may not be viable.
    There aren't many who don't ask for a guarantor, so if you cannot find one then you are stuffed.

    (Original post by cl_steele)
    They may well be doing that but on that what about later life, you cant be there at every juncture in their lives to cover their rear can you? Life isnt easy and people have got to learn that their wont always be someone to potentially bail them out if it comes to the crunch, especially if [as i said before] the parents cant even afford to...
    In later life it is likely they wont need a guarantor though.
    I am not saying parents should always cover their kids rears. This isn't about that. This is about the fact that, as I keep saying, the vast majority of landlords require a guarantor for students. That is fact. You may think its is unfair, and whatever. And I agree with the concerns about a student managing money. But at the end of the day, having one of your parents as a guarantor is simply part and parcel of nearly all rents for a student. It's just one of those things.
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    also OP why do you have to choose off campus? Its possible that if his refusal to sign is due to concerns about your responsibility that living in halls for a year and paying for that without having any money issues might convince him to sign next year.
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    (Original post by boba)
    yes its a lot smaller of a commitment!
    Its also a lot different in terms of importance.
    If your parents won't take out a phone contract in their name for you when you are 17, then that really doesn't matter at all.
    Whereas not being able to get a house for uni because your parents won't be a guarantor has a lot more of an impact (namely you will likely struggle).

    (Original post by boba)
    there is a difference between thinking they will and not having any guarantee that they wont. And honestly so many people I know at uni are so irresponsible with their money it seems like a fairly sensible concern. Simply making the statement that if that is a worry you have "more issues that just being a gaurantor" solves nothing the fact still remains that many people are irresponsible with money.
    But as I have said, it is just one of those things. Most landlords do need a guarantor from a student. Its usually part and parcel of renting as a student.

    (Original post by boba)
    many people are very private about their finances. And while yes I would just tell the person that was the reason that doesn't mean I would expect everyone to have the same attitude to sharing financial information as I do.
    For something as important as having a house at uni, I think some things need to take a back seat. Although saying that there have been threads on here about some parents who refuse to fill in student finance forms too, so I really shouldn't be surprised by how selfish some parents can be.

    (Original post by boba)
    well in my experience it was really easy to find one. I didn't struggle at all,(which is probably a really good thing since the rest of my friends parents would of happily signed with no worries). Me and my friends only viewed houses from three different land lords but non of them required one.
    Fair enough. I have lived in three rented houses at uni, and have just signed a contract for another now I have graduated and am about to start a job. All required a guarantor. Pretty much all my friends who went to uni have similar experiences. I am not saying you cannot find them, just that most will want a guarantor.

    (Original post by boba)
    also OP why do you have to choose off campus? Its possible that if his refusal to sign is due to concerns about your responsibility that living in halls for a year and paying for that without having any money issues might convince him to sign next year.
    I would say this is a good idea.
    Although saying that, you often find parents like this simply won't change their minds regardless of what you do to prove that you won't mess it up or whatever.
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    (Original post by WelshBluebird)
    Its also a lot different in terms of importance.
    If your parents won't take out a phone contract in their name for you when you are 17, then that really doesn't matter at all.
    Whereas not being able to get a house for uni because your parents won't be a guarantor has a lot more of an impact (namely you will likely struggle).
    but it means I will struggle in something I have chosen to do not something they have had a say in me doing. So why should they be put in a position that they do not feel comfortable with because of something they had no say in. Expecting that of them would be quite selfish of me.
    He has more than one friend who have been stuck with the liability of paying rent for their children. All but one of these children have previously appeared to be perfectly capable, responsible and honest about finances and gave no reason for their parents to doubt them and therefore they signed. Now while I am pretty sure that I wouldn't get into the position of not being able to pay my rent as far as the rest of the world could tell these people wouldn't either. Now my dad would most certainly not be able to afford to pay my rent under any circumstances and based on his friends experiences I can't exactly blame him for being worried.

    (Original post by WelshBluebird)
    But as I have said, it is just one of those things. Most landlords do need a guarantor from a student. Its usually part and parcel of renting as a student.
    but again the need for a gaurantor would be "just one of those things" 'caused by a decision that I have made. I don't have to go to university. And after making the decision that I wanted to I didn't have to go to a university far from home that I couldn't commute to. It may be usually part and parcel of renting as a student but the need to rent as a student is based on my actions not my parents. My dad never said to me "you should go to university in another county " infact he never encouraged me to go at all so why should he care what is part and parcel of being a student living away from home.




    (Original post by WelshBluebird)
    For something as important as having a house at uni, I think some things need to take a back seat. Although saying that there have been threads on here about some parents who refuse to fill in student finance forms too, so I really shouldn't be surprised by how selfish some parents can be.
    Telling the person why you wont sign wont make a difference to the fact that you won't so I don't see how it needs to take a back seat. And again I don't think its particularly selfish I think its selfish expecting that they should do things like this because of the choices you have made.


    (Original post by WelshBluebird)
    Fair enough. I have lived in three rented houses at uni, and have just signed a contract for another now I have graduated and am about to start a job. All required a guarantor. Pretty much all my friends who went to uni have similar experiences. I am not saying you cannot find them, just that most will want a guarantor.
    well like I said I had no difficulty finding three, and you say yourself that its not like you cannot find them so the fact that most need one doesn't matter when you can just go find the ones that don't


    (Original post by WelshBluebird)
    I would say this is a good idea.
    Although saying that, you often find parents like this simply won't change their minds regardless of what you do to prove that you won't mess it up or whatever.
    no but all you can do is try.
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    (Original post by boba)
    also OP why do you have to choose off campus? Its possible that if his refusal to sign is due to concerns about your responsibility that living in halls for a year and paying for that without having any money issues might convince him to sign next year.
    I can't live in halls. I have taken a year out but not for normal reasons so I must find off campus accommodation.
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    Ugh, why do people even bother having kids when they don't want to be responsible for them or look after them. Just because people are deemed to be independent at 18 doesn't mean they don't need their parents or relatives to co-operate in signing housing forms or student finance forms, it's just how the system works. It's kind of selfish of the parent to deny a child University, as it isn't easy without finance or accommodation. I think i would have to drop out if it ever happened to me and it's probably happened to people before. If the OP can prove he can pay and is willing to pay his own parents up front then I really can't see a problem. I agree that OP's father is a prick...

    I'm wondering whether the whole needing a guarantor thing is more to do with area, nowhere around my uni seems to need one but there are so many people saying these are few and far between. Are some areas more prone to bad tenants thus making landlords take more precautions maybe?
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    (Original post by cl_steele)
    Once again though it is possible, some may ask for a guarantor but equally some wont and that is the point... there are other options.

    I never mentioned fires though, i'd personally be concerned about being liable for £100+ a week, not all parents are in a position to afford that are they? lets be honest students are hardly the best people to trust with their finances and baring in mind the student loan doesnt always even cover the cost of housing let alone other expenses its perfectly reasonable to be concerned that theyd default on their rent and how exactly do you propose they moniter their finances? Trust the fruit of their loins to be entirely honest about the debt theyre racking up? Whilst some kids are perfectly trustworthy with their finances and being honest about them others arent and depending the person/parents i fail to see why they should take on a potentially crippling liability on the proviso of little more than a pinky swear...
    They may well be doing that but on that what about later life, you cant be there at every juncture in their lives to cover their rear can you? Life isnt easy and people have got to learn that their wont always be someone to potentially bail them out if it comes to the crunch, especially if [as i said before] the parents cant even afford to...
    Its not £100+ a week. Its £70-£80 a week. You have been wrong so many times. Did you not read I can pay for the rent several times over and this is without any loan?
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    (Original post by olympicdude)
    Its not £100+ a week. Its £70-£80 a week. You have been wrong so many times. Did you not read I can pay for the rent several times over and this is without any loan?
    I wasnt reffering to you i was speaking in a more general sense.
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    (Original post by olympicdude)
    I can't live in halls. I have taken a year out but not for normal reasons so I must find off campus accommodation.
    well then I don't really now what else to recommend, if you can't live in halls, can't convince your dad and there is noone else who can sign for you? your going to have to look for somewhere else unfortunately
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    (Original post by olympicdude)
    I need to find a place to live for university next year. I have been on a gap year and I have to choose off campus. I found two great places but the agencies needed guarantors from my parents. A guarantor is a person who pays for the rent if I can't pay it so my parents would pay if I can't pay.

    My parents point blanc refused to be guarantors and they said they wouldn't be persuaded. I am very careful with money, I have quite a lot of money saved up and I could pay the rent several times over, that's how much money I have saved up. Even so, my parents refuse.

    Term is about a month from starting. I haven't found a place to live and I could end up with nowhere or a ****ty place in a poor location at best, never having met the people or even looked at the place beforehand. Were my parents fair to do this?
    Yes, they are. Why should they be tied to your finances?
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    seriously, OP. just go private but use your head/common-sense. u should be able to find somewhere to live quite easily without having to resort to guarantor sigs.

    as to whether it's fair or not...must admit, i think it's fair enuff, yes. whatever his reasons, he chooses not to do it. his prerogative end of the day.
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    (Original post by Rhonut)
    Ugh, why do people even bother having kids when they don't want to be responsible for them or look after them. Just because people are deemed to be independent at 18 doesn't mean they don't need their parents or relatives to co-operate in signing housing forms or student finance forms, it's just how the system works. It's kind of selfish of the parent to deny a child University, as it isn't easy without finance or accommodation. I think i would have to drop out if it ever happened to me and it's probably happened to people before. If the OP can prove he can pay and is willing to pay his own parents up front then I really can't see a problem. I agree that OP's father is a prick...

    I'm wondering whether the whole needing a guarantor thing is more to do with area, nowhere around my uni seems to need one but there are so many people saying these are few and far between. Are some areas more prone to bad tenants thus making landlords take more precautions maybe?
    I was wondering the same thing. I'd imagine it's more one company in a city starts not requiring one (taking a risk) and then the others follow suit to keep up with the competition. Every company I've just tried to rent with (Norwich, for reference) has required one, and this is for a postgrad course with a £9k bursary on top of standard student loans. This was 11 companies (one wouldn't rent to me at all), plus I've rented with two others before who have also required one. These two were essentially landlord run. Though I suspect you'd be able to find some independent people who may be more flexible. This is easier said than done though, I looked for an independent property for months and couldn't find anything.


    Btw I agree with you completely

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    (Original post by olympicdude)
    Its not £100+ a week. Its £70-£80 a week. You have been wrong so many times. Did you not read I can pay for the rent several times over and this is without any loan?
    I think you need to discuss this with your dad,

    If you can afford it, have you considered offering him a deposit? If you put him in a situation where he's able to pay your rent if they do come after him then maybe he'll be more amenable.

    EDIT: Sorry I'd read the thread more carefully, maybe not such a good idea.

    Have you contacted and explained to the uni accommodation office what's going on. You might find they're able to offer you a halls room because of the circumstances.
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    Could you not pay all the rent up front so you don't need a gurantor? I know you can with private halls and some student houses, it all depends on your landlord but it may be worth asking if you know your definatley going to stay the whole year? It is harsh, especially if your parents know that you have the money saved up and will be able to pay the rent without needing them to bail you out.
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    you know i'm finding it really hard to read all the posts that are sayin OP's father is being xyz an calling him names. the man has got his child this far and yeah ok, he's not willing to do the guarantor thing - and the question was, is that fair, well yeah actually, it's kinda fair enuff. sounds like he's done what he could, for as long as he could. there's clearly a reason he doesn't wanna discuss this and it's a closed subject. mebbe there's a debt issue as mentioned previously. who knows.

    it may make life that bit harder for OP but, not impossible surely! especially saying how much money the OP has saved up.

    as a parent he has already done his duty...and no that doesn't stop at 18 but mebbe he's unable to do this one thing (whatever his reasons) and is too proud to say. for sure, i know my own dad's like this and it's incredibly frustrating when trying to reason with him.

    *mebbe a horse's head one of the times*

    guess i'm saying, leave the man his dignity and try and find another way.

    never have been able to understand the silent neg from someone i'm not even havin the convo with. if u disagree, make your case. i'm as open to ideas as hopefully, you are.

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