[Anonymous]

Hello everyone, just need a little advice from guys (and girls who may have experienced this scenario). The background story is this:

I'm a 22 year old girl and have only slept with one person, therefore it's safe to say i'm quite inexperienced (in comparison to the guy i'm about to talk about).

So I met this guy (a different guy to the one above) through one of my best friends 3 years ago at a "gathering" type thing. Before I even met him I had heard about him from other girls saying how attractive he is and the general impression i got was that he played on his looks a bit and was a bit of a "player". Anyway, we got on pretty well and he added me on facebook and we talked/flirted quite a bit on there etc etc blah blah. He soon after became in a relationship and we stopped talking. Then last year he randomly started talking to me, really out of the blue. I thought nothing of it and just remembered the reputation that he had, therefore not taking any of it very seriously.
To cut a long story short (sorry i am rambling) we have been texting/facebooking literally every day, and if i dont reply he'll send me another text a few hours later prompting me to reply. Due to me being away at uni and having a really bad summer due to personal reasons last year we still haven't met up since that night 3 years ago. I've been really busy this summer and rarely in my hometown and I can't see him until another three weeks, and he would have moved in to his new place by then. He has been hinting at having sex, and although I've only seen him once I feel as though we know each other really well due to texting every day for over a year, and he has helped me through some rough times.

So my question to the guys is: If you've been in constant, daily contact with a girl for over a year and known her for 3 years, and the first night you see her she sleeps with you, would you think she's really easy and lose interest? Or would you feel like because you've spoken everyday for over a year that she's not being easy? would you have more respect or her if she didn't? Basically, I do want to because I do like him, but I don't want to ruin whatever it is that we have because it is really nice at the moment. The impression I got three years ago was that he's a bit of a player but i'm hoping maybe he's got over all that now that he's older..?

Also girls, have you been in this situation where you've known the guy for a long time but for various reasons unable to see him, and then when you finally do would you sleep with him if you liked him or make him wait just because of the whole easy factor?

This probably makes me sound like a slut, but I've only recently lost my virginity and i dont sleep with anyone, I do like him but it's hard as we haven't seen each other in so long. Also as I'm quite inexperienced it might make things a little difficult/awkward.

Thank you for reading it all and thanks in advanced to any replies, would really appreciate your advice!

[AidanKD]

You shouldn't feel like a slut for wanting to have sex. If you're looking for a serious relationship then you should of course kinda hold back and see where things will go. But if you are just looking for something more casual then "easy" doesn't come into it that much to be totally honest. If you both want it and are both to the point then frankly it just makes life that much easier.

Just don't feel like he played you for a fool after and question if you are developing feelings for him because that will of course change the situation.

[Anonymous]

Thank you for your reply No I don't really want a relationship, I do like him but I couldn't see anything that serious coming out of it due to me being away at uni. It's just I wouldn't want to ruin our constant texts as it's so nice to have someone you know you'll be able to talk to that day, and if we had sex and then he stopped texting me it would hurt so much as i feel like we are good friends but I also find him attractive enough to sleep with him..

[Anonymous]

(Original post by AidanKD)
You shouldn't feel like a slut for wanting to have sex. If you're looking for a serious relationship then you should of course kinda hold back and see where things will go. But if you are just looking for something more casual then "easy" doesn't come into it that much to be totally honest. If you both want it and are both to the point then frankly it just makes life that much easier.

Just don't feel like he played you for a fool after and question if you are developing feelings for him because that will of course change the situation.

Thank you for your reply No I don't really want a relationship, I do like him but I couldn't see anything that serious coming out of it due to me being away at uni. It's just I wouldn't want to ruin our constant texts as it's so nice to have someone you know you'll be able to talk to that day, and if we had sex and then he stopped texting me it would hurt so much as i feel like we are good friends but I also find him attractive enough to sleep with him..

[AidanKD]

Well does he just flirt? Does he show genuine interest when you talk about non sexual stuff? I doubt he'd put on an act to that extend and you have been talking to years. I'm no expert but I mean maybe it's worth talking about it with him. it doesn't have to be totally spontaneous. P.s. no i'm not really THAT sure how you'd bring it up!

[Classical Liberal]

The power of friends of a girl approving of a guy is incredible.




If this guy was just some normal guy, you would think he was a ****ing creep. But because you have been told by your girlfriends that he is a bit awesome, he is able to be a ****ing wierdo and you still want him.

Unbelievable tekkers.