Should I be scared of him?

Reply 20

mktforfour?

4

Original post by medicine gapper

.

ofcourse, girls go by looks these days.

Yes in my day you'd go round to a girl's house and kindly ask her father if you could take her to a crack den.

Reply 21

This Honest

3

It's clearly affecting you so it's your call whether you see him again or not.
I wouldn't see him again especially after you said stop. What about if he went further?

Reply 22

Spicey

Tell him how you feel and ask him to stop.
If he does it again, leave him.
Simples *meerkat sound*

Reply 23

Grad_UK

Definitely weird.

One wonders what could happen a) further down the line or b) under the influence of alcohol / drugs??

As you felt frightened, this is an easy decision. Carry on ignoring calls / texts.

(edited 11 years ago)

Reply 24

Anonymous #1

OP

Original post by Hunchey

I'm sorry, but i don't 'really' think he's done anything wrong?

He got off you as soon as he saw you were concerned, and now you're debating not to talk to him again?

Please..

Wow, you don't have to be a dick about things! He made me feel like I was not in control of anything and I was really scared, so yes I am considering not seeing him again as I've never experienced anything like this before. It was horrible, felt like I was with someone else which scared me! And I'd already said "no" to the kissing etc before he grabbed my wrists, so he should of just left me alone!

If you think this is acceptable and you're a straight male.. god help you having a long-term, normal relationship.

Reply 25

Mangaka

10

Original post by medicine gapper

how do people get into bed together after only 2-3 weeks ?

my own opinion(don't get offended) , spend more time getting to know a guy.

ofcourse, girls go by looks these days.

ah well. my 2cents lady

All you seem to do is bitch about how shallow the world is...

Reply 26

Hunchey

Original post by Anonymous

Wow, you don't have to be a dick about things! He made me feel like I was not in control of anything and I was really scared, so yes I am considering not seeing him again as I've never experienced anything like this before. It was horrible, felt like I was with someone else which scared me! And I'd already said "no" to the kissing etc before he grabbed my wrists, so he should of just left me alone!

If you think this is acceptable and you're a straight male.. god help you having a long-term, normal relationship.

Clearly you're just a bit sensitive then.. you asked for advice, you got it.

No need to throw a tantrum when you hear something you don't like.

Reply 27

username1024541

10

Original post by smd4std

how is it sexual assault when she was willingly sleeping with him? all he did was kiss, and when she didn't kiss back he just stopped because it was getting awkward. that's not sexual assault.

She wasn't consenting to that activity. Just because you're sleeping with someone doesn't mean they can't assault you....where on earth did you get that idea from?! If someone says NO you don't have a right to ignore that no simply because they slept with you! And that can be a very scary situation to be in; someone physically controlling you and you being unable to escape and them ignoring you when you're obviously wanting/asking for them to stop, you panic...That is quite creepy behaviour. I personally would consider that assault as he was physically restraining her and kissing her (assuming he knew she wasn't consenting)

Although I think it depends on motives - if he was actively ignoring her obvious signs that she wanted him to stop, yet still continued then he was assaulting her. I'd say holding someone down and kissing them when they don't want is is assault, and it could lead to worse.

However, if he genuinely thought she was liking it (maybe he's been with a lot of submissive girls?)/didn't realise she wasn't consenting (some guys are just oblivious) then I'd say that he didn't mean any harm or to ignore her boundaries kind of thing and all she needs to do is explain that she doesn't like that and can he please refrain from doing that in the future and he will :smile:

my boyfriend did similar stuff like that to me (in a non-sexual assault way, he genuinely thought we were messing around) and I just told him very seriously that no, I didn't like that, no I didn't find it funny, and no it's not a joke. Sorted!

Yeah, just explain that you don't like that, see what he says. If he's reasonable he'll accept it and apologise. I'd talk to him first though, and see if he genuinely didn't realise you weren't wanting it and judge for yourself on his response. If you think he knew you weren't liking it, then I'd get out yeah, but if you think it was a mistake on his part then try again - but if he does anything similar in future: get out.

Reply 28

bmorgan87

this is what happens when girls tell us they all want a Mr.Grey ha

Reply 29

ashtoreth

11

if he made u feel fear, then there's summat to be afraid of...

up to u how u handle it but personally speaking, and after having read your OP, i'd be getting as far away as possible as fast as poss.

Reply 30

bex1994

Obviously wasn't there, but I'd say talk about it, or go with your gut instinct. Hope all goes well

Posted from TSR Mobile

Reply 31

Br1stol

He was clearly just trying to be affectionate to you after sex, and probably held your wrists and kissed you to have a laugh. Maybe that was a bad shout as you don't know each other well enough yet, but i do think you are being a bit sensitive. Don't just not call him, at least have the maturity to talk to him about it.

This was posted from The Student Room's iPhone/iPad App

Reply 32

Anonymous #1

OP

Original post by Br1stol

He was clearly just trying to be affectionate to you after sex, and probably held your wrists and kissed you to have a laugh. Maybe that was a bad shout as you don't know each other well enough yet, but i do think you are being a bit sensitive. Don't just not call him, at least have the maturity to talk to him about it.

This was posted from The Student Room's iPhone/iPad App

That's the thing, it didn't seem affectionate at all, he was kissing me and holding me down in some kind of manic way, not like usual and it went on for way too long as he must of felt me struggling or realised I wasn't responding to this/kissing him back.
I have texted him saying we should meet up, so i'll try and say something about it, but it's hard, and awkward, I might end it to be honest i'm far too creeped out.

Should I be scared of him?

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