Being single.

Hi

First off, this is not a rant about being single, more of a general question of peoples thoughts on the subject. I also understand that this topic has, more than likely been done several times.

A tiny bit about the situation that made me start to question this. I liked a girl, we get on well and I started developing feelings for her, went on a night out and then her friend tried to get with me, I didn't let anything happen but she assumed it did, I then told her how I felt about her and she basically said that 'she kinda liked being single', I took that as a no because in my opinion it was too open ended to mean something and I didn't want make things more awkward.

My friends and other confidants who knew that it happened said that was a typical, instinctive response as she was angry at her friend and at me. Fair enough, but this got me wondering if any one actually likes being single.

I really don't mind being single, I'm quite self sufficient, I have a great network of friends and family for the things that I can't manage to do completely by myself. I have a active social life and enjoy my hobbies independently and in groups such as sports. But I can't honestly say that I like being single, I do like the intimacy that relationships bring, and the thought that there will be someone there for you and that you are there for them regardless of what happens.

I would like to make myself clear, I don't go out with people just because I'm not going out with someone (if that makes sense), I go out with people who make me happier than when I'm by myself, or if I produce the same result on their end, preferably both. I like the total freedom I have being single, but I would quite happily swap some of that freedom for the right person.

Just wondering what others thoughts are on the subject. :smile:

Reply 1

kunoichi

I completely agree

You shouldnt be in a relationship until you can be happy single otherwise you just end up needy and dependent. You dont have to like being single, obviously the majority of people prefer bring in a relationship, but you should be able to get on with life happily, be enjoying life. Not sobbing in your room, pining for a partner because you cant stand being without one because that is unhealthy.

And if you can get to this state before going out with someone, the relationship will be a better one. People who are fine single tend to meet the right person faster i think, as they are more likely to wait for someone who suits them rather than jumping into an unsuitable relationship with the first person that asks.

Reply 2

lad-lad

Having friends with benefits is the best thing, there are too many pros and cons for being single/in relationship.

So what you should say to this girl is: "I like to be single too sweet heart, but I wouldn't mind sticking my penis in your vagina. I promise you can still be single after we are done"

Reply 3

Colour Me Pretty

Original post by lad-lad

It's inevitable that someone ends up wanting more, which is understandable if you sleep with the same person for a certain amount of time.

Atm, I'm fine with being single. I can't remember the last time I wanted to be in a relationship which is good because I used to crave one. Sure it would be nice to fall asleep next to someone occasionally, but I'm so happy with other areas of my life that it's not something I dwell on.

This was posted from The Student Room's iPhone/iPad App

(edited 11 years ago)

Reply 4

MSI_10

ME THOUGHTS YO.

EDIT: I put a YT vid here, is it showing!?

Reply 5

ViceVersa

I guess it depends on how you're feeling at different periods, your needs, and the general context, but atm I'm happy being single. I've been in and out of relationships for about a year and generally been in a few complicated situations. Some of those relationships were amazing.. and the heartbreak was bad, and some of the others were really bad and a little toxic. So I'm tired I guess, and I just want a break. I've been really enjoying being single tbh, and I want to stay single for at least two months before I get into a relationship again (unless I meet someone really special that makes me change my mind about everything...). However, there are times in the past when I haven't been happy being single at all. It really just depends, but yes it is possible for people to be happy with their current single status. :smile:

(edited 11 years ago)

Reply 6

jumpingjesusholycow

You really ought to put the question in bold, and at the beginning of your post so as to avoid all the waffling.

"Does anybody really like being single?"

Answer: Yes.

It depends what your current occupation is, whether you find someone you like and what your needs are but there's no objective reason people can't have a preference for being single.

(edited 11 years ago)

Reply 7

gabbiehall

I've been single for 3 years and honestly it's the best thing. Yes, sometimes I miss the company and having someone to care for but the past relationships I had put me in complex situations which weren't worth it. Just enjoy being single and the right time will come for you to be in a relationship with someone.

Reply 8

Daniellejo.

I actually used to really like being single and really didn't enjoy the thought of a relationship at all; way too much hassle. This is before I met someone who I genuinely really did like, which is rare for me lol. After experiencing it though, I imagine that if I was single again I would like the idea of having the same feelings again.