If your best friend previously liked him

This is mainly targeted to girls but it works both ways. Ok, let's say this guy after ages told you he was into you, you really like him and you want to give it a go. However; a year ago, your best friend used to have a thing for him but she doesn't anymore. Would give it a go with the guy?

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Reply 1

Tizz

4

If she doesn't anymore, and nothing happened between the friend & guy...there's no problem lol

Reply 2

username1002982

14

Just ask your friend if she still likes him and if she would be ok with you going out with him.

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Reply 3

ShannonCarney

Original post by thinktoomuch610

This is mainly targeted to girls but it works both ways. Ok, let's say this guy after ages told you he was into you, you really like him and you want to give it a go. However; a year ago, your best friend used to have a thing for him but she doesn't anymore. Would give it a go with the guy?

Posted from TSR Mobile

I disagree with the others, i think its a no go area. Even if I wasnt actually with a boy and only had a thing, I would still be affected if my best friend went on and had something with him. Friends will always be there

Reply 4

Aquar

8

Think about it the other way around. Think about a boy you liked a year ago, and imagine your best friend going out with him. Would you care? I don't think so.

Reply 5

damilola

12

i'd go for it, seeing as she no longer has a thing for him it shouldn't be a problem.

Reply 6

Lexi99

11

I would definately check with her first if it was ok, i think that only fair

Reply 7

Kazbian

10

As long as she doesn't have a thing for him anymore, then it should be ok. If she's had a thing for him for a year though, then the answer would be no.

Reply 8

Pigling

8

I've never agreed with people forbidding their friends from dating someone just because they like them. You can't "bagsie" a human being. I think it's an incredibly selfish attitude. If you clearly have no chance with someone you move on - rather than attempting to indefinitely stall their love life whilst you do nothing.

So, yes - I would. Showing sensitivity and respect to your friends doesn't require kowtowing to unreasonable/selfish demands.

(edited 11 years ago)

Reply 9

dendodge

9

What's the problem?

You like him, he likes you, your friend doesn't like him. I really don't see an issue.

As long as you're sure your friend doesn't like him any more - it might be worth making sure. But even then, she doesn't have a chance with him because he wants you instead. So I really don't see why your friend should factor into it.

But that might just be me...

Reply 10

py0alb

3

What business is it of your friends? Two consenting adults can do whatever they like. If she is a friend worth having, she will be overjoyed to hear that you've found someone you like.

Reply 11

py0alb

3

Original post by Pigling

I've never agreed with people forbidding their friends from dating someone just because they like them. You can't "bagsie" a human being. I think it's an incredibly selfish attitude. If you clearly have no chance with someone you move on - rather than attempting to indefinitely stall their love life whilst you pine for them silently.

So, yes - I would. Showing sensitivity and respect to your friends doesn't require kowtowing to unreasonable/selfish demands.

Bagsie first dibs on every girl in the world.

Reply 12

username1002982

14

Original post by ShannonCarney

I disagree with the others, i think its a no go area. Even if I wasnt actually with a boy and only had a thing, I would still be affected if my best friend went on and had something with him. Friends will always be there

But if you didn't even like him when your friend started dating him, would you still care?

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Reply 13

thinktoomuch610

OP

4

Thanks for all the responses!

I just wanna clarify my situation because I don't think it's what most of you think!

I'm a guy who's into this girl and our mutual friend and this girl I'm into are REALLY close. But she said to me thai the girl I'm into (her friend) might have doubts because her best friend used to have a really big thing for me (we used to be close friends but had a massive falling out and now don't speak). So I'm wondering would any of you not go for a guy, even if you liked him and he liked you back just because you're friend used to have a thing for him?

Thanks again for these great response :smile:

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Reply 14

dendodge

9

Original post by thinktoomuch610

Thanks for all the responses!

I just wanna clarify my situation because I don't think it's what most of you think!

I'm a guy who's into this girl and our mutual friend and this girl I'm into are REALLY close. But she said to me thai the girl I'm into (her friend) might have doubts because her best friend used to have a really big thing for me (we used to be close friends but had a massive falling out and now don't speak). So I'm wondering would any of you not go for a guy, even if you liked him and he liked you back just because you're friend used to have a thing for him?

Thanks again for these great response :smile:

Posted from TSR Mobile

Whoops, I guess I forgot to look at the gender icon next to your name :tongue:

Either way, I don't think it matters too much. If you and the girl's friend don't even talk any more, I doubt she'll care if you start dating.

Reply 15

Gemma345

11

Check with her - but don't give her control. She might be jealous and pretend it's not okay. Just see what she has to say with regards to her feelings, then tell her that he's said he likes you. She'll probably appreciate you checking, because it shows you care etc.

Reply 16

Suzanne123

18

I think talk to her first and tell her to be honest with you so there is no confusion between anyone.

Reply 17

Pen Island

10

I'd talk to your friend first but I think she should be ok with it :smile:

I was worried about getting together with my current boyfriend because he used to go out with one of my best friends (and it ended badly between them) but I talked to her, made her see how much I liked him and she was fine with it :smile:

I see no problem with it, we can't help who we like.

(edited 11 years ago)

Reply 18

Pawsies

15

No don't. I know of a real life situation of this- the friends are no longer friends, person who got with the boy was outcast from our class by pretty much everyone. It did not end well for her, however she is still with him.

Reply 19

flubadiblam

9

Original post by thinktoomuch610

This is mainly targeted to girls but it works both ways. Ok, let's say this guy after ages told you he was into you, you really like him and you want to give it a go. However; a year ago, your best friend used to have a thing for him but she doesn't anymore. Would give it a go with the guy?

Posted from TSR Mobile

Totally fine, tell your friend just to be safe. Only clear times when its a no go is if they currently like them a lot or been in a serious relationship with them in the past!

If your best friend previously liked him

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