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university with my boyfriend?

Reply 20

Gemma345

11

Original post by Treeroy

Sorry to disrupt the thread, but is Southampton good? I'm thinking of applying there. :smile:

Yeah - I'm in my first year, and I absolutely love it here. Thinking of changing courses, but the university is great. What are you thinking of studying?

Reply 21

Anonymous #1

OP

what do you take at Southampton? also were about is it?

Reply 22

enchanted-fireflies

6

Original post by Anonymous

I am so sorry to hear that please may I ask how long you was together?

Nearly four years unfortunately.

Reply 23

Anonymous #1

OP

Original post by enchanted-fireflies

Nearly four years unfortunately.

I am so shocked to hear. I hope you a're doing okay

Reply 24

poiuy

10

If you were going to stay together through uni then what uni you go to wouldn't effect this; it's just that distance would require more effort. You have to consider the what ifs. Don't go to a uni with a bad reputation/below your capabilities just because he's there or you could regret it in the future. Maybe go to unis near each other or both live separably at the same uni. If you live together the intensity would increase and also the awkwardness and difficulty of finding new accommodation if you break up; have you lived together before?

Reply 25

username47781

20

Original post by Anonymous

I am applying for ones I want to go to and will go to a different on to him if I have to but I'm just asking that if it comes down to us ending up going to the same is that a good idea or is long distance a better idea

No real right or wrong to be honest, think you gotta do what is best for you and he's got to do the same when it comes to Uni. Either way is certainly doable I think both have their pro's and con's.

Reply 26

enchanted-fireflies

6

Original post by Anonymous

I am so shocked to hear. I hope you a're doing okay

It came as quite a shock at the time don't get me wrong but two years down the line I realise how much of an idiot he was in the first place :smile:

Reply 27

Origami Bullets

19

Original post by Anonymous

thank you for your help. I don't think I made it very clear sorry I am 17 now and when I said have been together just over 2 years I mean when we as start university 2014 we will have been together just over 2 years. but we need to start looking September this year and when we start looking we will have been together over a year sorry for not making myself clear please inform me if any of your opinions change

Aha. So you've been together for four months. A lot can change between now and when you apply, for better or for worse.

If you happen to both find that your favourite university is the same one, then that's all well and good. However, it's very common for people to break up when they go to university. I know one couple who had been together for two or three years, including one year LDR. She was contemplating breaking up with him during freshers week, and had done so a week or two later. University is a massive change in anyone's life, in fact, it's one of the biggest changes you go through short of emigrating alone - don't underestimate it.

If you do end up going to the same university, then make sure that you live in different halls, and make your own friends. That way, you'll know that if you did break up then you wouldn't have to constantly see him, and you'd still have friends of your own, rather than finding that all your friends have to choose sides (never a comfortable position to be in!). And don't stay at home and commute for the sake of a boyfriend. I know one girl who did that, and commuted 40 miles to her uni each day. As a result, she had no social life at uni and no real friends, and I think the enormity of that only really started to hit her when they broke up half way through her degree.

Reply 28

Anonymous #1

OP

nope we haven't been together 4 months and I have high expectations of mine and his relationship this is the reason I am trying the think ahead about how I am going to go about university I am not going to go to a uni just because he is going I was just hoping for a bit of help on what the options are if we are together when going and applying for uni also to see what other . people have done

Reply 29

Origami Bullets

19

Original post by Anonymous

nope we haven't been together 4 months and I have high expectations of mine and his relationship this is the reason I am trying the think ahead about how I am going to go about university I am not going to go to a uni just because he is going I was just hoping for a bit of help on what the options are if we are together when going and applying for uni also to see what other . people have done

I can think of only three couples I know (however remotely) who have stayed together through Uni, or at least until second / third year. One couple have been together since they were 13 and now have a baby, and the LDR continues. One couple have been together since they were 15 (also an LDR). The one couple I know who have gone to the same Uni and stayed together lived in different halls in first year, before moving in together but with other friends in second year, and their own flat in third year. They have also been together since they were 15.

Oh, and a spot of realism doesn't mean that you need to neg me, J.

Reply 30

misst911

15

Don't go to the same university just to stay together, there will be a lot of blame if you break up and have ended up somewhere you didn't really want to be. It's not basing your whole future on.

Reply 31

Treeroy

18

Original post by Gemma345

Yeah - I'm in my first year, and I absolutely love it here. Thinking of changing courses, but the university is great. What are you thinking of studying?

Computer science - I'm a nerd. :cool:

Reply 32

Sc44

Possibly a personal question and feel free now to answer. But did yous work out or what happened with regards to accomidation ? I'm in a similar situation and I'm curious.

Reply 33

knope

3

If you like the same university/ies as him then go ahead, but don’t try and mould your choices to his. My friend picked all 5 unis the same as her then-boyfriend and now seriously regrets it, which probably isn’t too uncommon.

Reply 34

Boomshanka

9

I'm at the same uni as my boyfriend and its great. We have been together for nearly 6 years, so it had been about 3 years when we started. We managed to get rooms in the same halls in first year, and since then have lived together off-campus. Good luck :yeah:

Reply 35

hannahwendy97

Okay so I know that my answer wont apply to the original question posted in 2013, but I'm sure this question gets searched a lot so my answer will be relevant and I hope that it will help some people with their decision. So my situation will be different to most peoples but I will get onto that. My boyfriend and I were together for two years when we had to make the decision of whether or not we should go to the same university, in fact we started discussing it the summer before we had to apply and after a tearful conversation we just decided to wait until we had to make the decision. We both wanted to do the same course (drama) so it wasn't too weird us applying to the same universities because they would be the best ones for drama, but with that course you have to audition to most places and well we only got into two (Staffordshire university & Bath Spa university) out of the five (staffs/bath/bournemouth arts/essex/arts london). I got into all of the universities and my first choice was Bournemouth arts and it was my boyfriends as well but sadly he didn't get a place so we had to make a decision. Everyone was telling me that I should go to Bournemouth as university is about you and what you want but I knew that I wanted to be with my boyfriend forever and that if we went our separate ways then that probably wouldn't happen. On the day you had to make the decision I decided that I would rather be with my boyfriend than go to a nice uni but as soon as I made my decision I decided that I didn't actually want to do drama and luckily was accepted onto a Journalism course at Staffordshire uni and am very happy with that decision to this day! We've been at university together for just over a year now and it is completely normal and I know I made the best decision for me. So many people went to the same uni as their partners at staffs uni so I didn't feel like people would judge our decision we both have our own sets of friends and will still have time for each other. Personally I think that if you want to spend the rest of your life with this person then go for it and even if it doesn't work out university is such a big place that that chances of you bumping into each other is unlikely so I would recommend it to those who are in love (and seriously know it) but if you're not 100% then don't because it is new and weird and does put a strain on the relationship but if you love each other it will work! Do what feels best but don't listen to what other people say because they don't know how you feel! Hope this helps a lifelong couple!

university with my boyfriend?

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