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How many dates do you go on before sleeping with someone?

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Reply 40
Original post by py0alb
Its not sexist, I apply the same principle to both sexes. The sexists are the guys that think its ok for them to sleep with someone on first date, but if a woman does the same she's "not relationship material". They're the guys you want to avoid like the plague.


Id rather avoid the kind of guy whod dump me for not dropping my knickers after only knowing him a few hours Ill be honest.

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Reply 41
Original post by gemmam
Id rather avoid the kind of guy whod dump me for not dropping my knickers after only knowing him a few hours Ill be honest.

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and that is entirely your perogative.
Reply 42
Original post by py0alb
and that is entirely your perogative.


Yes it is. Believe it or not some people might simply not want to have sex with someone they hardly know. They shouldnt be looked down and judged for it nor should the people who do choose to have casual sex.

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I think it totally depends I did sexual stuff with my boyfriend on our first date actually but the first time we properly had sex was ehm about 3 dates in I think, it just felt right.
Original post by py0alb
Yeah, loads. I'm in an LTR right now. Most of my friends are married, having met their spouses this way.

I would suggest that in my experience and observation between 1 in 3 and 1 in 4 casual sexual encounters end up leading to a relationship.

If you're going to get bored of them after having had sex, surely its better to know that straight away rather than wasting 2 months before finding out?


Yeah I see what you mean, I don't think they're necessarily boring.. I just get bored of listening once I've got laid. :/ Suppose I need to stop thinking of girls as a means to an end, then I won't feel like it's the end of my journey once I get laid, if that makes any sense..
Reply 45
Original post by gemmam
Yes it is. Believe it or not some people might simply not want to have sex with someone they hardly know. They shouldnt be looked down and judged for it nor should the people who do choose to have casual sex.

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I'm not looking down upon you, its simply that we would be unlikely to end up in a relationship together because I would assume you weren't interested and would instead accept the offer of a second date off another girl who did demonstrate her interest more... effusively.
Reply 46
Original post by RichyFrench
Yeah I see what you mean, I don't think they're necessarily boring.. I just get bored of listening once I've got laid. :/ Suppose I need to stop thinking of girls as a means to an end, then I won't feel like it's the end of my journey once I get laid, if that makes any sense..


Getting laid should be the start of the journey, not the end.
Original post by py0alb
Getting laid should be the start of the journey, not the end.


Guess I'd better change my priorities then.
Reply 48
Original post by py0alb
I'm not looking down upon you, its simply that we would be unlikely to end up in a relationship together because I would assume you weren't interested and would instead accept the offer of a second date off another girl who did demonstrate her interest more... effusively.


You were saying that a woman who choose to wait would end up being a slave and cheated on...

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Reply 49
Original post by gemmam
You were saying that a woman who choose to wait would end up being a slave and cheated on...

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Thats a little hyperbolic, but I don't think its unreasonable to assume that if you wish to find a modern man, you are more likely to be successful by acting like a modern woman. Attitudes towards gender roles tend to come as a package; if you expect a man to be old-fashioned in courtship, you better get used to the idea of him being equally old-fashioned once the relationship has begun.
Reply 50
Original post by py0alb
Thats a little hyperbolic, but I don't think its unreasonable to assume that if you wish to find a modern man, you are more likely to be successful by acting like a modern woman. Attitudes towards gender roles tend to come as a package; if you expect a man to be old-fashioned in courtship, you better get used to the idea of him being equally old-fashioned once the relationship has begun.


Well guess Ill just have to remain single then.

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Reply 51
Original post by gemmam
Well guess Ill just have to remain single then.

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I don't expect women to sleep with me after the first date. My ex-g/f wanted to sleep with me after a few hours of meeting me in town but I tried to be respectful and got her a taxi home.
Reply 52
Original post by gemmam
Well guess Ill just have to remain single then.

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Thats a bit of an extremist stance, no?
Until your ready is the best time. For me after a month, naturally. I don't have a special time or anything, I just know. And that depends on who I'm dating too. If I want something a little more long term then I would want to get to know them more and see if we are compatible. He isn't getting any sugar walls till I'm sure he's a decent guy and we are in a relationship.
Reply 54
okay - this is a question for you sexually-active singles out there (20 or 30-somethings).
Reply 55
Original post by py0alb
Thats a bit of an extremist stance, no?


Well if its really the way you said
then either way Im going to be unhappy and feel disrepected, id rather do without tbh. Im pretty much a comfirmed spinster anyway haha

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(edited 11 years ago)
It varies. Whether or not it feels like the right time is more important than how long it's been chronologically.
Reply 57
Original post by gemmam
Well if its really the way you said
then either way Im going to be unhappy and feel disrepected, id rather do without tbh. Im pretty much a comfirmed spinster anyway haha

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You'd honestly rather be alone forever than meet a wonderful guy and initiate a fantastic passionate relationship right from the 1st or 2nd date?
Reply 58
Original post by py0alb
You'd honestly rather be alone forever than meet a wonderful guy and initiate a fantastic passionate relationship right from the 1st or 2nd date?


Ive never had casual sex and the idea has never appealed to me. Id rather do without any male contact at all than be used for sex by someone who doesn't give a **** about me and/or even finds me attractive. How would I know if he was a wonderful guy or not if I dont know him anyway?

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(edited 11 years ago)
Reply 59
Original post by gemmam
Ive never had casual sex and the idea has never appealed to me. Id rather do without any male contact at all than be used for sex by someone who doesn't give a **** about me and/or even finds me attractive.

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Who said anything about that? You seem to be presupposing what will happen.

If you've never had casual sex, how do you know it won't a deeply moving and empowering emotional experience that leads to a blissfully happy and life long romance?

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