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Girls - Would you date a fat bloke ?

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Mate, I hate to say it but it comes down to the weight in the end.

Let me explain:
Girls are crazy about their body even if they slightly overweight, overweight or even skinny as a model. They always aspire to look their best -regardless of their personalities. You may have noticed this; they buy tons of make up, work out and eat healthy (well try to) just so they can look good.

Either way, it's because they care about their body.

So before they got the chance to like you properly, and they found out about how you are, they will not be as interested. This is because they probably think you do not take care of your body as much as they do. Secondly, they would like their efforts rewarded; they put in so much effort looking good, they'd want someone who looks good too.

Let me add that this is before they have actually fallen for you. So you may meet some girls who is in too deep with you and thus does not care about your weight. But that's difficult nowadays regardless of what you look like.

Either way if you think about it, why do girls aspire to look good? Some say competition between girls and some say to find someone good looking.

It seems to me you have a good personality and they seem to communicate well with you already etc. Importantly, they even called you handsome -despite the weight. So you are not lacking in other departments. So get tonning down, hit the gym EVERYDAY (trust me) and honestly, cut down on eating significantly for a couple of weeks. Your body will start to drop a few pounds you'll notice.

Look into a change in diet and exercise regularly.

Cut down on the eating bro.

I don't know how tall you are but I'd say aim for the 23 to become 15 or something soon. Set yourself a ridiculous time frame -it will motivate you etc!

Good luck

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Reply 21

username447608

I like chunky men my ex was large but I think 23 stone is a bit much as im a very active person I love to go out on runs and long walks and go to the gym and stuff with boyfriend so if your weight affected your ability to exercise then that would bother me rather than the actual look of an overweight person its more the practical reasons that would bother me

Reply 22

Fuzzlepuff

As long as you are a nice person. :smile:

Reply 23

Vassal

Define Fat ... its a broad term that can mean anything .. for instance I am overweight for my ideal age/height/weight but not obese.

And chances are, based on my own personal experience from places like Plenty of Fish and OK Cupid that they will overlook anyone with a hairline out of place, because people seem to judge and cover read people before getting to know that person or spend time chatting to them.

My own thoughts on this are more of the fact that I prefer personality and compatibility then looks, we are all different and all have quirky things about us, whether it being overweight, having webbed feet or a third nipple .. in truth nobody has the right to judge anyone else in terms of looks .

I would personally limit using dating sites as more often then not they are a scam and the whole internet security issues surrounding them don't make them worth it really, get yourself out into the real world, find some local pubs/bars/clubs, go on speed dating .. anything that gets you out and meeting people showing them the real you beyond your size.

Chris/Vassal.

Reply 24

nicatre

I've always been big and I've had good relationships so, from a male perspective, I can't see why not :smile:

it's not how you look which keeps you together after all.

Reply 25

username967462

I would rather go out with someone who I got on well with than someone with a nice face. However if there was a situation where one guy had a better physique than another person who was overweight, and but somehow they had the exact same personality, I would go for the better looking one. Personally I train hard six days week to keep toned so I find wobbly bits a huge turn off. And I am very conscious about my health too.

I think that it is great that you are losing weight to improve you image. You will also be healthier and have more confidence! Good luck.

Reply 26

abc:)

Well, with girls in general it varies. There are obviously girls who will date fat guys.

Personally I like a guy with meat on him, whether it's muscle or fat. Skinny guys just aren't as attractive to me

Reply 27

Truflais

I'm chubby myself, and weight is something that people can change with dedication. Obviously you are dedicated to this, so in all honesty I wouldn't have a problem with it. You seem to have a lovely personality and the only thing that I would dislike about you is if you weren't bothered about losing weight - but you are, so I don't see any problem. Some women are vain unfortunately but I know a lot of girls who like a guy with a bit of meat on them. My boyfriend used to be 18 stone, I can't say I found him any less attractive. I'm glad he's lost the weight for health reasons but he still has a little bit of a tummy which I like, lol.

Reply 28

Rakas21

I feel for you man, i put on 144lb in 5 years and only over the past year have i got a grip and recorded sustained losses (11st to 21st - 6'4), I've also had the misfortune of starting to receede early though certainly women were never really bothered about the hair but have been about me getting fat.

Some of the responses on here are very surprising though, i can understand aesthetics or lifestyle objections or even not wanting to gain weight with a partner yourself but there's so much fear of your partner dropping dead early when its still highly unlikely to happen.

Reply 29

Spetznaaz

Original post by lindopski

....

I suggest you check this thread out: http://forum.bodybuilding.com/showthread.php?t=898532&page=1

All the motivation you could ever need for losing weight, and a good insight into why people don't "like" people who are over weight.

Reply 30

A_Howells

Ages ago, I really liked this girl but it didn't go anywhere because she told me she preferred fatter guys. :mad:

Im serious too, she wanted a guy who she could hug, make her feel warm and she said they are better in bed??? I don't believe that myself. The ladies might help solve that one.

Reply 31

LISSEY

I think it's great that you're trying to lose weight & I wouldn't worry about what girls think about you. This time next year if you carry on losing weight you'll be a new person & won't need to ask questions like this. :smile:

Reply 32

SarahWorksout

Original post by eliza.anne

It's called having standards

Reply 33

kka25

And they say men are shallow :s-smilie:

Reply 34

User1014865

If he had other qualities that redeemed him, yes.

Reply 35

RosieH7

I personally would to know them and then decide however if they were really big no because I wouldn't be attracted so we would practically just be mates.

Thoughts:
if they slob about eating takeaways every night then I can only imagine personal hygiene. (Assumption I could ofc be wrong)

Why should I make an effort when they don't.

I don't want to lose them to heat disease etc if it was a serious relationship then what about kids and stuff.

Guys rarely go for big girls (big not curvy)

These may have been pointed out but I b just thought I'd share my views.

You seem like a nice guy. Personality always shines through; amount of hot guys who become repulsive after getting to know them is untrue

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(edited 11 years ago)

Reply 36

Cybele

I don't mind 'chubby' guys at all, in fact I like it a little bit, moreso than skinny, but if you're obviously overweight/obese then it would put me off. As people have said, attraction is important, and being very big will put a lot of girls off. There's also the health aspect, I like guys who take care of themselves and are athletic, which I'd know you're not.

However, personality is always king and it's very easy to like someone purely because of that, so I wouldn't rule it out completely. Well done on losing weight, I hope you're feeling the benefits. :smile:

Reply 37

SarahWorksout

Have you actually lost any weight? Are you exercising as well as eating right?

Reply 38

mulberry1

yes if we like him otherwise! but he'd have to work harder on making a good first impression if he's seriously fat to be honest

Reply 39

ironandwine

I wouldn't rule it out completely but it's highly unlikely if I'm honest. I'm a pretty active person and just don't think someone overweight would really be that suited to me, or vice versa; I don't mean that rudely though. Though if I were you I think you should be losing weight for yourself, because you want to, not because you think girls will like you more.