Crazy University Stories II

When I was in the process of applying to university, nothing got me as excited for what was to come than http://www.thestudentroom.co.uk/showthread.php?t=1740972 this thread. I was reading back through it earlier and thought it might be a good idea to start a new thread in the same vein for this years' applicants to get excited about.

Since I've been at uni for a little while now, I'll start with a few things that have happened to me or people I know since September...

* On one occasion, I was supposed to be going out to celebrate the end of January exams with some coursemates. The plan was to meet at one of their flats at 9pm, predrink, and then head out. Bored, I decided to start my own pre-predrinks in my room, alone, at 5pm. I had eaten nothing at all that day, and over the course of about 2 and a half hours, drank at least half a litre of rum, during which time I listened to "Somebody to Love" by Jefferson Airplane a great many times on repeat, laughed maniacally to myself and then ate a clove of garlic when prompted by one of my flatmates who I eventually came to the kitchen to see.

I left my flat sometime before 8, after which my memory gets very hazy. I met a friend who I was supposed to be travelling to the flat with and apparently got on a bus with her. When we got off, we got in a taxi which I was apparently sick in. We then stumbled into the entrance of the block of flats, which I was also apparently sick in, after which my friend and security hauled me onto the street outside, where I was also sick and collapsed in a gurgling heap on the floor with no idea where I was, feeling incredibly rough. I have no idea how I got home and later found out from my flatmates that they put me to bed. At 9:15.

* Another time, I'd come in from a flat party at about 4am and ended up in the room of one of my flatmates, where he and two of my female flatmates were sitting. Our conversation drifted towards sex and (I'm not entirely sure how or why things got to this point) my flatmates pulled his dick out, put a condom on it and started trying to masturbate, loudly lamenting his inability to achieve an erection as he did so. The rest of us just sat there in stunned silence, punctuated occasionally by a few outbursts of confusion and disbelief. After he'd stopped, I asked him if I could have the untouched Dominoes pizza that was on his bed. He said yes, I took it and went to bed. Result.

* One evening, in the company of a pair of my friends who were visiting from home, I went out and got enormously drunk, to the point where I don't remember half of what happened and a lot of what I do remember took a while to come back to me. That night, I: spilled a vodka and coke all over a girl in a cream dress, ran full pelt after a bus that wasn't mine on the way home, narrated an argument between two girls on the bus, loudly repeating everything they said, but prefixing it with "hashtag", ordered fried chicken in a takeaway and then tried to do the same about two minutes later, having forgotten my previous order, tried poorly to explain the philosophical concept of bundle theory to my flatmates and then invited a complete stranger I saw out of my flat window to stay the night in our kitchen as long as he promised not to steal anything as he didn't have a place to stay that night.

That's probably enough from me for now - anyone else?

(edited 11 years ago)

Reply 1

hermitthefrog

Pretty standard drunken shenanagins but might aswell:

Went to my subject ball a few weeks ago with some friends, one of whom got hammered before we got there and when we sat down at the table she ate everyone else's roll before we got there much to the annoyance of the other guests. Throughout the meal I could feel myself getting more and more drunk off the free wine, and by pudding I thought it would be a great idea to let my friends text my mum telling them how much I love cock. By the end of the ball I am so hammered I can't see and can't walk so we decide to skip the after event at the club and just go home. I then proceed to run into every flat in my block yelling YOLO turning on their showers. When I got back my flatmate decided to draw glasses and a lightning bolt on my face so I then decided to mount our broom and run around campus singing the Harry potter theme tune.

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Must revive

Well, my story all started when I was at the student pub watching an Arsenal game (the game against Watford to be exact, we won 3-0 I think) and having a few drinks. After the game, I get a call from one of my flatmates inviting me to come back to drink with him and some other flatmates. I tell him I need to have some food first but yeah, after that, why not?

The food thing did not happen. Another one of my flatmates managed to persuade me to start drinking with them before I'd had any dinner (never a good idea). This somehow led to me drinking a mixture of whisky and vodka, possibly some other stuff as well, from an empty Quality Street box (ironically, it was mine, and I let my flatmates have all the ones I didn't like). Now, the consumption of such a mixture of alcohol is never a great notion, but I was also drinking it on a pretty empty stomach.

What ensued was a performance of Queen's Bohemian Rhapsody (I'm sure there are worse songs to be singing when drunk), before I collapsed onto the floor and the flatmates present picked me up and put me to bed. I didn't remember that last part until a flatmate showed me a video of me doing all that the following day.

Crazy University Stories II

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