Boyfriend never wants to have sex, tried talking. Doesn't work.

Break up if you are not sexually compatible with him.

He must be sleeping with another female.

Break up if you are not sexually compatible with him.

Unless he's drunk that's the only time he really wants it, I can count on one hand the amount of times we've done it in 2 months. He always invites me go stay over, we have a lovely evening together but by the time we go to bed he's always tired. Therefore never wants sex and its really getting me down. I've tried talking to him about it countless times but it doesn't work. If we do end up having sex it's never him who initiates it its always me, and I end up feeling like an idiot when he says no or when we do it and he clearly cba. I've just said to him, what's the point in me staying over, if you go straight to sleep every time and his reply 'I'm tired' and i said I feel rejected and he says he's not rejecting me when he clearly is. I'm lay next to him now, he's asleep and I just feel like getting dressed and going home, I'm on the verge of crying. Because I feel like he doesn't want to have sex with me - it makes me feel horrible. I only stay over once a week, so it's not asking a lot.. Seriously fed up and don't know if I can go on like this. Help please.

It is his right to refuse to have sex as and when he likes for whatever reason he pleases. It is his body and you cannot pressurize him into having sex just because you want to.

Probably your sex drives are incompatible with each other. If you wish, you may be able to see a General Practitioner to ask for libido suppressants for yourself.

What do I do then?

1. He's cheating on you (the bastard! sorry, but this is the most probable reason)

2. He is no longer attracted to you. Maybe you've changed? Have you recently gained weight or changed your hairstyle, etc. ?

3. He is not comfortable with his own sexuality anymore. Maybe he had some sort of recent sexual trauma that has had a psychological effect on him. Or maybe he has changed and is just looking for an excuse not to sleep together because he's embarrassed?


Either way, try talking to him one more time and ask him what the reason is. If he won't even have the balls to admit why he doesn't want to sleep with you, leave him, he is honestly not worth your time!

Unless he's drunk that's the only time he really wants it, I can count on one hand the amount of times we've done it in 2 months. He always invites me go stay over, we have a lovely evening together but by the time we go to bed he's always tired. Therefore never wants sex and its really getting me down. I've tried talking to him about it countless times but it doesn't work. If we do end up having sex it's never him who initiates it its always me, and I end up feeling like an idiot when he says no or when we do it and he clearly cba. I've just said to him, what's the point in me staying over, if you go straight to sleep every time and his reply 'I'm tired' and i said I feel rejected and he says he's not rejecting me when he clearly is. I'm lay next to him now, he's asleep and I just feel like getting dressed and going home, I'm on the verge of crying. Because I feel like he doesn't want to have sex with me - it makes me feel horrible. I only stay over once a week, so it's not asking a lot.. Seriously fed up and don't know if I can go on like this. Help please.

That's not a helpful reply, I'm not a rapist! Boyfriends are supposed to want to have sex with their girlfriends!

Did you actually both agree that it would be a *sexual* relationship when you entered it?

As I said, everyone has the right to refuse to have sex since everyone has autonomy over their own bodies. For example, if someone asks you to have sex with them you also have the right of refusal. They can't legally force you.

Probably your sex drives are incompatible at present. There may be some form of combinatorial drug therapy that both of you can take - e.g. if you both see a General Practitioner he/she may be able to provide you with a mild quantity of libido suppressants and provide your partner with a mild quantity of testosterone supplements such that your sex drives match more closely.