Is my friend gay?

I've been wondering for years, it doesn't make a difference to me if he is, just want to see if TSR think he is
Here's a list of things why I think he might be;
He goes bright red and really quiet whenever people mention about him being gay related
He's a bit camp
He has girlfriends but never stays long in them, his longest one was 3months
He went out with my best friend once (only for a week), and she said he realllly didn't know how to talk dirty and they were just like friends
All his friends are girls, he ggets on with a couple of guys hut nit really friends..
There was a rumour that he have my friend a blow job..
All this makes him sound like he is, but I don't understand why he hasn't come out if he is gay or bisexual? If he did, all his friend's and family would be extremely supportive, he isn't religious at all, there's no pressure for him to be heterosexual at all,
Why has he not come out?

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Reply 1

L'Evil Fish

Maybe he doesn't know? Or is waiting for an experience to see if he is... Oh yeah, or he's not!

Ask him :smile:

Trust me on that one :tongue:

if you're especially close it'll definitely be fine... :smile:

(edited 10 years ago)

Reply 2

Tiger Rag

Original post by _anyawalsh

I
Why has he not come out?

Posted from TSR Mobile

- he may not be gay
- he might not be sure / curious
- he may be worried what others thinks

Reply 3

GTSwattsy

In my opinion, yes he may well be.
It may be stereotypical but more often than not those whose friend base is mostly female tend to be gay

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Reply 4

PINKFLEUR

Don't automatically assume that he's gay just because of the way he acts/what others say about him.

The only way you'll know for sure is by asking him.

Reply 5

Michaelj

Original post by _anyawalsh

Yeah, we'll just get out our crystal balls and tell you.

He goes bright red and really quiet whenever people mention about him being gay related

Ok, so he's shy. This doesn't show anyone to be gay. Some people may be uncomfortable talking about certain topics.

He's a bit camp

Ok...?

He has girlfriends but never stays long in them, his longest one was 3months

My longest is three months. I'm not gay.

He went out with my best friend once (only for a week), and she said he realllly didn't know how to talk dirty and they were just like friends

So to not be classed as gay, we gotta talk really dirty, like? Some people sadly just don't know how to talk dirty, I am one of those people, once again I'm not gay.

All his friends are girls, he ggets on with a couple of guys hut nit really friends..

That's the biggest clue I can find but once again it doesn't tell us enough. Maybe if you said "I saw him kissing another man", then we could speculate.

There was a rumour that he have my friend a blow job..

Rumours are that... Rumours. Sometimes they're true, most times they are vicious rumours. I imagine because he's "camp" he may get nasty things said to him and nasty rumours by immature people. Such as "I saw him giving a blowjob to a man".

All this makes him sound like he is, but I don't understand why he hasn't come out if he is gay or bisexual? If he did, all his friend's and family would be extremely supportive, he isn't religious at all, there's no pressure for him to be heterosexual at all,
Why has he not come out?

All you've told us are rumours and things that you don't seem too sure on. If he's not gay then he's not going to come out.

If you think he is gay then ask him. IF you are good friends with him then he won't hide anything, he may get offended if he's straight but you are friends, aren't you?

Just to say, I have about 3 of those points you mentioned and I am not gay nor bi-sexual. :rolleyes:

Reply 6

gypsyclimber

I have a best friend who I was really close with throughout high school and college. He's always been ridiculously camp, had the odd girl but they only ever really lasted a couple of weeks and it was always a little forced. We all had our suspicions, and eventually after a couple of years he began to be more open about his campness, and began to talk about the odd guy being hot but he NEVER overtly talked about his homosexuality. This went on for a few more years, and he now has a long term boyfriend but has still NEVER said the words 'I'm gay'. We never asked him if was gay, not even once, as we felt it was none of our business and he would come out in his own sweet time, and we never made assumptions before he made it obvious - it's taken a long time.

Basically, what I'm trying to say is don't worry about it. It's his life, his choice and he will come out if he is gay when he is ready, and if he's not he won't. Just be his friend and be there for him and let him get on with it :smile:

Reply 7

Tai Ga

OP you might have better luck asking him, rather than strangers on the web.

Reply 8

username47781

It is impossible to know unless you ask him, you can get camp guys who are not guy at all, then you get guys who are not camp but they are gay, it is just how it is.

Reply 9

samleigh

Original post by _anyawalsh

He has girlfriends but never stays long in them, his longest one was 3months

That sounds like an awfully long time to stay in your girlfriend... :tongue:

Reply 10

Tiger Rag

Some people have no interest in relationships, it doesn't make them gay.

Reply 11

paulpscully

Original post by _anyawalsh

there's no pressure for him to be heterosexual at all.

I'd rethink that bit

He might be gay, he might not! It's his choice to come out :smile:

don't try get it out of him because that just won't work xD make sure that you & your friends are clear that you're okay with him being gay! :P

Reply 12

username877577

Ask him?

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Reply 13

_anyawalsh

We all just thought of as being gay (not making assumptions, just without thinking about it, it feels just the same as when I'm with other gay mates)
Well people have asked him before but he just doesn't say anything and changes the subject, so I know he's not ready and I wouldn't want to push it, I just thought he had good enough friend's to be comfortable enough to be himself
That being of course if he is gay, he has commented on the occasional girl being hot but this may be a cover up?
Just curious that's all
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Reply 14

JD95

Not everyone wants to come out you know. Doesn't mean they don't know what the are or that they're ashamed of it or anything, they might just not want to come out for whatever reason.

Ever considered he could be bi?

Reply 15

blackrose1234567

Original post by _anyawalsh

None of those indicate he's gay, I have a gay friend who is one of the strongest guys I know, into horror movies and loves sports. The 'gay' stereotype is not necessarily an accurate one, and as for the rumour, it's not difficult to spread a rumour.

Reply 16

eggfriedrice

Just ask him genuinely one to one. If he says he's not, then leave it.

Reply 17

_anyawalsh

Original post by shuheb789

Oh I know, I hate to stereotype, but they can be indicators, doesn't mean they are but just all the things together.. Well the guy he supposedly sucked off told me, but obviously I dont know if he was telling me the truth, also the is gay and he was like 'oh yeah he's definitely gay'

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