Extremely lonely, no friends; very down in general
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Original post by punani
I stopped comparing myself to others after about the age of 18 as I became aware that you will never know everyone's exact situation and how it compares to yourself. People who appear very successful and happy on the outside can be in complete turmoil on the inside and vice versa. Just like icebergs, people only show a little bit of themselves to the world. Far more lies beneath the surface than you can imagine.
Since people always try and show the best version of themselves to the world what you are comparing yourself to doesn't usually exist. They will have covered up all their flaws, while your flaws are all you can concentrate on. You will be comparing the best version of others to the worse version of yourself and so it will never be a fair comparison. It only leads to misery.
The best way to stop comparing yourself to others is to set your own goals and measure yourself against these. Set goals, make a plan of action as to how you will achieve them, give it your best shot, measure yourself against your own goals and then repeat.
I think you are suffering from paralysis by analysis. Stop thinking about the past and what you should have done and instead focus on what you should do now in order to achieve the kind of life you want to lead.
What i meant was why not just look over some "room to rent ads"? Go have a look at some places with a spare room and if you like the place and the people who live there, just move in. You will gain more independence and will probably become good friends with your flatmates.
What I mean by "putting yourself out there" is that in life, to achieve anything you have to take risks. Making friends is no different. You have to introduce yourself when there is a risk that the other person will ignore you or be rude. You have to strike up a conversation that might not lead anywhere or become awkward, you have to let people get to know your flaws and weaknesses when they might use them against, you might invite someone to go or do something with you and they reject you and you look and feel like a t**t, you might turn up to an event on your own because you don't know anyone there and everyone ignores you.............etc etc.
But if you don't do any of this. If you don't take any risks, then you don't get any rewards. You won't meet that person who you feel like you've known all your life after a few hours, you wont meet that person who shares your sense of humor, you wont meet that person who has the same hobbies as you, you wont meet that person who loves the same music as you and who has a spare ticket to go see your favourite band and who you have the greatest night of your life with and who you end up marrying, having kids with, a car, a house and all the other stuff that you feel will make you happy........etc etc
Your life is your canvas to do with what you want, but you have to paint it. No-one else is going to come along and paint it for you.
Since people always try and show the best version of themselves to the world what you are comparing yourself to doesn't usually exist. They will have covered up all their flaws, while your flaws are all you can concentrate on. You will be comparing the best version of others to the worse version of yourself and so it will never be a fair comparison. It only leads to misery.
The best way to stop comparing yourself to others is to set your own goals and measure yourself against these. Set goals, make a plan of action as to how you will achieve them, give it your best shot, measure yourself against your own goals and then repeat.
I think you are suffering from paralysis by analysis. Stop thinking about the past and what you should have done and instead focus on what you should do now in order to achieve the kind of life you want to lead.
What i meant was why not just look over some "room to rent ads"? Go have a look at some places with a spare room and if you like the place and the people who live there, just move in. You will gain more independence and will probably become good friends with your flatmates.
What I mean by "putting yourself out there" is that in life, to achieve anything you have to take risks. Making friends is no different. You have to introduce yourself when there is a risk that the other person will ignore you or be rude. You have to strike up a conversation that might not lead anywhere or become awkward, you have to let people get to know your flaws and weaknesses when they might use them against, you might invite someone to go or do something with you and they reject you and you look and feel like a t**t, you might turn up to an event on your own because you don't know anyone there and everyone ignores you.............etc etc.
But if you don't do any of this. If you don't take any risks, then you don't get any rewards. You won't meet that person who you feel like you've known all your life after a few hours, you wont meet that person who shares your sense of humor, you wont meet that person who has the same hobbies as you, you wont meet that person who loves the same music as you and who has a spare ticket to go see your favourite band and who you have the greatest night of your life with and who you end up marrying, having kids with, a car, a house and all the other stuff that you feel will make you happy........etc etc
Your life is your canvas to do with what you want, but you have to paint it. No-one else is going to come along and paint it for you.
thanks for the reply
i still have unresoved issues in my life i think i would be best to see a professional about
Original post by bloomblaze
it would be dead awkward being mid 20s sitting alongside a group of 18 year olds
also, it would be awful still being in education at that age when people your own age are getting mortgages,jobs etc, ive fallen way others my own age
also, it wouldnt look too good on a cv/to an employer, i imagine theyd prefer a young graduate
also, it would be awful still being in education at that age when people your own age are getting mortgages,jobs etc, ive fallen way others my own age
also, it wouldnt look too good on a cv/to an employer, i imagine theyd prefer a young graduate
Tell that to my 30 year old coursemate, who has a great time. There's more 'mature' students at uni than you'd think
Have you thought about doing an Open University course? They can be pricey these days , although you can get a grant. The reason I suggest this is because the vast majority of OU students are mature students, so you won`t have to worry about being around teenagers.You study at home in your own time, but every one else doing your course meets up once a week, usually at a local college in the evening, so you will get to know people with the same interest as you, from different backgrounds, but will also, probably, be that bit maturer too. If you feel uncomfortable taking the plunge and signing up for an Undergraduate degree, the OU offers plenty of shorter courses to get people started,to give them a bit of confidence if they haven`t studied for some time. You need absolutely no previous academic qualifications whatsoever. Good luck.
You should stop comparing yourself to other people as it isn't healthy. Stop thinking about the cars, friends or jobs they have and start focusing on you. What would make you happy?
If you're lonely, why don't you start attending a club? It could be sports if you have a particular interest, or just anything else to get you out of the house and meeting other people, then you can make friends.
If you're bored with your job opportunities, are there any university courses you may want to start? It doesn't have to be through the conventional route - you could try the Open University or go to a local one.
It is hard to motivate yourself but just picture yourself where you would like to be (a realistic goal) and start making progress. You're only 23, that is still very young and plenty of time to have an enjoyable life.
If you're lonely, why don't you start attending a club? It could be sports if you have a particular interest, or just anything else to get you out of the house and meeting other people, then you can make friends.
If you're bored with your job opportunities, are there any university courses you may want to start? It doesn't have to be through the conventional route - you could try the Open University or go to a local one.
It is hard to motivate yourself but just picture yourself where you would like to be (a realistic goal) and start making progress. You're only 23, that is still very young and plenty of time to have an enjoyable life.
Original post by Adelaide--
You should stop comparing yourself to other people as it isn't healthy. Stop thinking about the cars, friends or jobs they have and start focusing on you. What would make you happy?
If you're lonely, why don't you start attending a club? It could be sports if you have a particular interest, or just anything else to get you out of the house and meeting other people, then you can make friends.
If you're bored with your job opportunities, are there any university courses you may want to start? It doesn't have to be through the conventional route - you could try the Open University or go to a local one.
It is hard to motivate yourself but just picture yourself where you would like to be (a realistic goal) and start making progress. You're only 23, that is still very young and plenty of time to have an enjoyable life.
If you're lonely, why don't you start attending a club? It could be sports if you have a particular interest, or just anything else to get you out of the house and meeting other people, then you can make friends.
If you're bored with your job opportunities, are there any university courses you may want to start? It doesn't have to be through the conventional route - you could try the Open University or go to a local one.
It is hard to motivate yourself but just picture yourself where you would like to be (a realistic goal) and start making progress. You're only 23, that is still very young and plenty of time to have an enjoyable life.
regarding the comparing thing, i feel insecure that i dont have a girlfriend by my age.
My dad was married at 23.
i know 2 guys my age who recently got married, makes me feel awful that i cant get a gf at my age and ive missed the opportunity to get one/meet a life partner.
most people meet their OH/life partner at university, i didnt go to university......
also, most girls my age are taken
Original post by bloomblaze
regarding the comparing thing, i feel insecure that i dont have a girlfriend by my age.
My dad was married at 23.
i know 2 guys my age who recently got married, makes me feel awful that i cant get a gf at my age and ive missed the opportunity to get one/meet a life partner.
most people meet their OH/life partner at university, i didnt go to university......
also, most girls my age are taken
My dad was married at 23.
i know 2 guys my age who recently got married, makes me feel awful that i cant get a gf at my age and ive missed the opportunity to get one/meet a life partner.
most people meet their OH/life partner at university, i didnt go to university......
also, most girls my age are taken
hi
I'm 27 and i met my partner when I was 24. He was 31, had had a failed relationship, and been on his own for 3 years. 3 years living alone and not dating.
We meet people when we meet them. It is becoming increasingly hard in this day and age.
You could online date, I've heard wonders.
Or join a gym, club, society, political party. Anything social.
I understand what it's like to be lonely.
But hey! we have the internet! You're here right now talking to people about how you feel.
I think that maybe, from what I've read, it might be worth seeing your GP and explaining how unhappy you feel. Antidepressants did wonders for me. I was a whole different person. And that lack of endorphins may be holding you back.
I feel weird weighing in on your life. I don't know you. But I do sympathise and relate to your situation, because I've felt lonely and frustrated. If you want someone to message, my inbox is open.
Take care x
Original post by thewallflower
hi
I'm 27 and i met my partner when I was 24. He was 31, had had a failed relationship, and been on his own for 3 years. 3 years living alone and not dating.
We meet people when we meet them. It is becoming increasingly hard in this day and age.
You could online date, I've heard wonders.
Or join a gym, club, society, political party. Anything social.
I understand what it's like to be lonely.
But hey! we have the internet! You're here right now talking to people about how you feel.
I think that maybe, from what I've read, it might be worth seeing your GP and explaining how unhappy you feel. Antidepressants did wonders for me. I was a whole different person. And that lack of endorphins may be holding you back.
I feel weird weighing in on your life. I don't know you. But I do sympathise and relate to your situation, because I've felt lonely and frustrated. If you want someone to message, my inbox is open.
Take care x
I'm 27 and i met my partner when I was 24. He was 31, had had a failed relationship, and been on his own for 3 years. 3 years living alone and not dating.
We meet people when we meet them. It is becoming increasingly hard in this day and age.
You could online date, I've heard wonders.
Or join a gym, club, society, political party. Anything social.
I understand what it's like to be lonely.
But hey! we have the internet! You're here right now talking to people about how you feel.
I think that maybe, from what I've read, it might be worth seeing your GP and explaining how unhappy you feel. Antidepressants did wonders for me. I was a whole different person. And that lack of endorphins may be holding you back.
I feel weird weighing in on your life. I don't know you. But I do sympathise and relate to your situation, because I've felt lonely and frustrated. If you want someone to message, my inbox is open.
Take care x
in my experience, the very vast majority of people who are successful in relationships met their life partner at an age significantly younger than me
i dont like the idea of online dating and wouldnt do it
There is another problem at play though that I feel needs to be mentioned- im ugly and no girl has ever fancied me- thats kind of a barrier to finding a partner.
I did create a profile once on a dating site, upload a photo/put some desriptions/ and contacted women. you know how many women have replied to me on it? None, not any.
its a pity theres no one professional i can talk to about this, i mean you can pay money to have a personal fitness trainer, pay money to be taught a new skill, but theres not exactly a Dating/ Relationships consultant you can visit.
how would you feel if you were too ugly to ever have a boyfriend/relationship(and you never had a relationship ever, and died as a virgin) and all people your age had bfs and you were the only single one?
Thanks for your reply
(edited 10 years ago)
Original post by bloomblaze
it would be dead awkward being mid 20s sitting alongside a group of 18 year olds
also, it would be awful still being in education at that age when people your own age are getting mortgages,jobs etc, ive fallen way others my own age
also, it wouldnt look too good on a cv/to an employer, i imagine theyd prefer a young graduate
also, it would be awful still being in education at that age when people your own age are getting mortgages,jobs etc, ive fallen way others my own age
also, it wouldnt look too good on a cv/to an employer, i imagine theyd prefer a young graduate
I believe employers prefer older graduates actually, they assume they are more mature. My girlfriend had never worked a day in her life and yet got a job in her professional field at 25 straight out of uni, as far as either of us can tell it must have been her age.
Don't keep comparing to people your age, you need to wind the clock back and start again, you lost a few years. (And you only notice the successful ones, there are many, many more directionless, jobless middle-class people your age.) We have 40 or 50 years in our careers working and being independent, there's plenty of time and it's no fun growing up too fast.
Personally I wish I'd left it a few years before coming to uni myself, 18 is way too young to be going to uni as you want to go out and have fun rather than do useful things like get work experience and pursue interesting hobbies.
Original post by bloomblaze
in my experience, the very vast majority of people who are successful in relationships met their life partner at an age significantly younger than me
i dont like the idea of online dating and wouldnt do it
There is another problem at play though that I feel needs to be mentioned- im ugly and no girl has ever fancied me- thats kind of a barrier to finding a partner.
I did create a profile once on a dating site, upload a photo/put some desriptions/ and contacted women. you know how many women have replied to me on it? None, not any.
its a pity theres no one professional i can talk to about this, i mean you can pay money to have a personal fitness trainer, pay money to be taught a new skill, but theres not exactly a Dating/ Relationships consultant you can visit.
how would you feel if you were too ugly to ever have a boyfriend/relationship(and you never had a relationship ever, and died as a virgin) and all people your age had bfs and you were the only single one?
Thanks for your reply
i dont like the idea of online dating and wouldnt do it
There is another problem at play though that I feel needs to be mentioned- im ugly and no girl has ever fancied me- thats kind of a barrier to finding a partner.
I did create a profile once on a dating site, upload a photo/put some desriptions/ and contacted women. you know how many women have replied to me on it? None, not any.
its a pity theres no one professional i can talk to about this, i mean you can pay money to have a personal fitness trainer, pay money to be taught a new skill, but theres not exactly a Dating/ Relationships consultant you can visit.
how would you feel if you were too ugly to ever have a boyfriend/relationship(and you never had a relationship ever, and died as a virgin) and all people your age had bfs and you were the only single one?
Thanks for your reply
it's not all about looks...
sounds like you're pretty negative about yourself. you should see someone about that.
not everyone is conventionally beautiful, that doesn't prevent someone seeing the beauty in them. you seem like an alright guy, bit down on yourself.
most girls look for more than looks in a partner.
do you only look for looks in a girl?
you have to learn to love yourself before anyone else will, it sounds cliched but it's true. you have good qualities, you know you do. recognise that. you want a relationship, which is more than a lot of guys your age.
i feel i've said enough. good luck.
Original post by thewallflower
it's not all about looks...
sounds like you're pretty negative about yourself. you should see someone about that.
not everyone is conventionally beautiful, that doesn't prevent someone seeing the beauty in them. you seem like an alright guy, bit down on yourself.
most girls look for more than looks in a partner.
do you only look for looks in a girl?
sounds like you're pretty negative about yourself. you should see someone about that.
not everyone is conventionally beautiful, that doesn't prevent someone seeing the beauty in them. you seem like an alright guy, bit down on yourself.
most girls look for more than looks in a partner.
do you only look for looks in a girl?
i do think that relationships are extremely looks-based and that women place looks well above personality in the dating game
I mean, it'd be way easier for a good looking guy with awful personality to get girls than an ugly guy with a good personality. does anyone agree??
i dont only go for looks in a girl but they play a part.
Original post by thewallflower
you have to learn to love yourself before anyone else will, it sounds cliched but it's true. you have good qualities, you know you do. recognize that. you want a relationship, which is more than a lot of guys your age.
i feel I've said enough. good luck.
you have to learn to love yourself before anyone else will, it sounds cliched but it's true. you have good qualities, you know you do. recognize that. you want a relationship, which is more than a lot of guys your age.
i feel I've said enough. good luck.
i thought most guys my age were after relationships
i do have good qualities but my looks obviously are not up to girls standards, which is why im in this position
(edited 10 years ago)
Original post by bloomblaze
i do think that relationships are extremely looks-based and that women place looks well above personality in the dating game
I mean, it'd be way easier for a good looking guy with awful personality to get girls than an ugly guy with a good personality. does anyone agree??
I mean, it'd be way easier for a good looking guy with awful personality to get girls than an ugly guy with a good personality. does anyone agree??
your attitude is quite immature, perhaps that is the problem.
you need to look at why you want a girlfriend. look inwards instead of outwards.
look at getting help to feel more confident about yourself, your GP can provide this.
you are hung up on shallow ideas, and while that is your out look, and you hate yourself, you will never be happy.
sorry if that sounds harsh, i wish you the best.
Original post by thewallflower
your attitude is quite immature, perhaps that is the problem.
you need to look at why you want a girlfriend. look inwards instead of outwards.
look at getting help to feel more confident about yourself, your GP can provide this.
you are hung up on shallow ideas, and while that is your out look, and you hate yourself, you will never be happy.
sorry if that sounds harsh, i wish you the best.
you need to look at why you want a girlfriend. look inwards instead of outwards.
look at getting help to feel more confident about yourself, your GP can provide this.
you are hung up on shallow ideas, and while that is your out look, and you hate yourself, you will never be happy.
sorry if that sounds harsh, i wish you the best.
whats immature about my attitude? the fact i think women go for looks and relationships are looks based
I need to look at why i want a gf? are you saying i'd be better off without one?
(edited 10 years ago)
Original post by bloomblaze
regarding the comparing thing, i feel insecure that i dont have a girlfriend by my age.
My dad was married at 23.
i know 2 guys my age who recently got married, makes me feel awful that i cant get a gf at my age and ive missed the opportunity to get one/meet a life partner.
most people meet their OH/life partner at university, i didnt go to university......
also, most girls my age are taken
My dad was married at 23.
i know 2 guys my age who recently got married, makes me feel awful that i cant get a gf at my age and ive missed the opportunity to get one/meet a life partner.
most people meet their OH/life partner at university, i didnt go to university......
also, most girls my age are taken
Comparing yourself to others only makes you feel worse and you shouldn't devalue yourself.
It's better to wait for the right person than to force something that won't work, so I wouldn't worry about relationships. If you are and would like to meet someone how about joining clubs?
You don't have to go to university to meet your life partner. My parents met at a bar, my grandparents met at a dance, etc.
Give yourself a break and some time.
Im in a quite similar position to the orginal poster nearly 24 isolated friendless and trapped have pretty much lost the will to live .I made a bad life choice when I was 16 to do a apprenticeship with my father I quickly grew to hate it but wasnt allowed to quit I was emotionally blackmailed by my parents to continue. Ive realized now that there is no realistic opertunities for me as trying to get A levels later than the age of 20 in certain subjects is nearly impossible. I decide on a open university course something to occupy my mind other than being depressed and mabye be a way out I think there isnt though.mabye some people just have to accept that there life will be pointless:
Original post by bloomblaze
whats immature about my attitude? the fact i think women go for looks and relationships are looks based
I need to look at why i want a gf? are you saying i'd be better off without one?
I need to look at why i want a gf? are you saying i'd be better off without one?
Hi Bud
Just noticed your thread and i do sympathise with your situation.
I just want to make you aware of a few facts that may help you in deciding what you really want
I am 29 now and about start my first Degree after 10 years in the Marines.
On the subject of girlfriends i would stay don't go looking for them, as if you do the wrong one always turns up and makes your life a lot harder than i needed to be !! "yes personal experience"
One way to get you out of this self defeating mind set is to engage in physical exercise 4-5 times a week, and cut out the booze. Once you begin to feel confident in yourself it will show out and you will become more attractive to women.
( i knew a lad in Afghan a few years ago who was quite a bit less than ideal in the looks department, yet he was confident and as such his G/F was stunning!!)
One of the other thing i noticed about you is that you seem concerned about people getting on with their lives and having a mortgage car etc...i am selling my house and going to university full time " in effect going back wards" but in three years time after a degree i will be moving forwards again.
Sometimes you have go backwards to go forwards, and also learning to accept and learn from failure is something that i will always value very highly from my military time.
STICK TWO FINGERS UP TO THE PAST AND PREPARE TO SMASH INTO THE FUTURE
You have the power...and ignore all those who try and tell you other wise
Finally my favourite mantra which has got me though things in the past came from an old Sergeant Major of mine.
" suck it up buttercup , cos no one gives a ****!!"
get back to me for a chat bud
Original post by RobbieDee
Hi Bud
Just noticed your thread and i do sympathise with your situation.
I just want to make you aware of a few facts that may help you in deciding what you really want
I am 29 now and about start my first Degree after 10 years in the Marines.
On the subject of girlfriends i would stay don't go looking for them, as if you do the wrong one always turns up and makes your life a lot harder than i needed to be !! "yes personal experience"
One way to get you out of this self defeating mind set is to engage in physical exercise 4-5 times a week, and cut out the booze. Once you begin to feel confident in yourself it will show out and you will become more attractive to women.
( i knew a lad in Afghan a few years ago who was quite a bit less than ideal in the looks department, yet he was confident and as such his G/F was stunning!!)
One of the other thing i noticed about you is that you seem concerned about people getting on with their lives and having a mortgage car etc...i am selling my house and going to university full time " in effect going back wards" but in three years time after a degree i will be moving forwards again.
Sometimes you have go backwards to go forwards, and also learning to accept and learn from failure is something that i will always value very highly from my military time.
STICK TWO FINGERS UP TO THE PAST AND PREPARE TO SMASH INTO THE FUTURE
You have the power...and ignore all those who try and tell you other wise
Finally my favourite mantra which has got me though things in the past came from an old Sergeant Major of mine.
" suck it up buttercup , cos no one gives a ****!!"
get back to me for a chat bud
Just noticed your thread and i do sympathise with your situation.
I just want to make you aware of a few facts that may help you in deciding what you really want
I am 29 now and about start my first Degree after 10 years in the Marines.
On the subject of girlfriends i would stay don't go looking for them, as if you do the wrong one always turns up and makes your life a lot harder than i needed to be !! "yes personal experience"
One way to get you out of this self defeating mind set is to engage in physical exercise 4-5 times a week, and cut out the booze. Once you begin to feel confident in yourself it will show out and you will become more attractive to women.
( i knew a lad in Afghan a few years ago who was quite a bit less than ideal in the looks department, yet he was confident and as such his G/F was stunning!!)
One of the other thing i noticed about you is that you seem concerned about people getting on with their lives and having a mortgage car etc...i am selling my house and going to university full time " in effect going back wards" but in three years time after a degree i will be moving forwards again.
Sometimes you have go backwards to go forwards, and also learning to accept and learn from failure is something that i will always value very highly from my military time.
STICK TWO FINGERS UP TO THE PAST AND PREPARE TO SMASH INTO THE FUTURE
You have the power...and ignore all those who try and tell you other wise
Finally my favourite mantra which has got me though things in the past came from an old Sergeant Major of mine.
" suck it up buttercup , cos no one gives a ****!!"
get back to me for a chat bud
thanks for the reply Steven
I don`t know where abouts you live, but there is a model agency in London called Ugly [www.ugly.com].They hire "character" models,unusual faces, etc. You wouldn`t need to be London -based in order for them to consider taking you on their books.[ Most castings and auditions would most probably be held in London though.] If you have something unusual about your looks, the agency could love you and just might be able to get you work. Check out their website; you never know. BTW, we live in N.Ireland, and a friend of mine`s husband, with absolutely no acting experience whatsoever, was picked to be an extra in Game of Thrones. He appears in it regularly. His is tall, skinny,and has long shaggy hair, and the most awful crooked, even black teeth you can imagine. Just the type of person the casting department were looking for.!!!
Original post by bloomblaze
it would be dead awkward being mid 20s sitting alongside a group of 18 year olds
also, it would be awful still being in education at that age when people your own age are getting mortgages,jobs etc, ive fallen way others my own age
also, it wouldnt look too good on a cv/to an employer, i imagine theyd prefer a young graduate
also, it would be awful still being in education at that age when people your own age are getting mortgages,jobs etc, ive fallen way others my own age
also, it wouldnt look too good on a cv/to an employer, i imagine theyd prefer a young graduate
Oh stop- you are not mid 20s, you are early 20s, and you have plenty of time to make something of your life, but you have to be pro-active. I am going to Uni this September after years of dead end jobs, ****ty relationships and mental health problems. things only changed for me when I decided enough was enough and I got up and decided to do something about it. Sometimes "you gotta fake it to make it, baby"- people want to be around people that make them feel good - sad but true. I am not saying that everyone is shallow, but if you are unhappy, pretend to be happy, because nine times out of ten, you will end up having a pretty good time anyway. Eventually you will stop pretending to be happy because you will be there naturally.
Medication or counselling might help, it helped me once I found the right pills for me - now I take one a day and I feel 'normal'. I have my off days, but then everyone does, so I just ride it out and wait for tomorrow if I feel crap.
What about doing a foundation degree, then an undergrad degree at Uni, if that is what you want to do? Even if you don't necessarily want to do a degree for the qualifications, it would be a good way to meet people, to get out of your rut, and you will probably have the best years of your life so far, if you use it as an opportunity to better yourself. there are lots of grants and bursaries available, and being a mature student (over 21) there would be a different entry route for you. It is estimated that up to 60% of undergrad students nowadays are mature students, so you would most certainly not be alone either!
Just remember that there are thousands of lovely things in the world, but they won't fall into your lap, like the pot of gold at the end of the rainbow you have to go and find them.
(I just realised how cliched some of this sounds, but they are cliches for a reason - because a lot of people feel the same way at some point in their lives and need a helping hand to get back on their feet. If you need to talk feel free to inbox me, it might not sound like it through my preachy ramblings, but I am very approachable and would like to try to help you if I can. I have been there, and it DOES get easier, I promise.)
Original post by bloomblaze
Hello,
I'm a 23 year old man looking for any advice or insight. I still live with my parents and hate it, we are always arguing about small things, I really need some breathing space.
I don't have any friends, I'm off work this week and I haven't spoken to anyone all week except my parents. I get so lonely, I always have had this problem since I was young. Most guys have serious relationships/girlfriends and male friends. It depresses me hearing about people going travelling/on holidays etc and I wont be going because i have no one to go with and I wont be going on holiday this year (or next)
I do nothing at weekends, Id love friends to go out with. I've wasted my teens with no friends an now my twenties are falling away, i will have no good memories to look back on.
I have no car and therefore im super dependent on public transport and my parents. I hate being so closely tied to my parents, want a bit of freedom. All people mt age have cars decent jobs, serious relationships, friends, their own place to live etc
I didn't go to university which I regret and my job options are very limited.
I've made an absolute mess up of my life, I think a counselor could help, I'm bored and depressed, this thread is just a general rant about the situation to see if anyone can help... i think I have clinical deprsssion, I
just cant keep living like this, im at my absolute wits end, Ive had YEARS of this
Thanks for any advice
I'm a 23 year old man looking for any advice or insight. I still live with my parents and hate it, we are always arguing about small things, I really need some breathing space.
I don't have any friends, I'm off work this week and I haven't spoken to anyone all week except my parents. I get so lonely, I always have had this problem since I was young. Most guys have serious relationships/girlfriends and male friends. It depresses me hearing about people going travelling/on holidays etc and I wont be going because i have no one to go with and I wont be going on holiday this year (or next)
I do nothing at weekends, Id love friends to go out with. I've wasted my teens with no friends an now my twenties are falling away, i will have no good memories to look back on.
I have no car and therefore im super dependent on public transport and my parents. I hate being so closely tied to my parents, want a bit of freedom. All people mt age have cars decent jobs, serious relationships, friends, their own place to live etc
I didn't go to university which I regret and my job options are very limited.
I've made an absolute mess up of my life, I think a counselor could help, I'm bored and depressed, this thread is just a general rant about the situation to see if anyone can help... i think I have clinical deprsssion, I
just cant keep living like this, im at my absolute wits end, Ive had YEARS of this
Thanks for any advice
hi, boom was just wondering how you are now, has anything changed? i'm in a similar situation to you except that I am 17
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