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How can growing up without a mother affect a child?
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I grew up without a mother, I knew who she was and she visited me but in no way was it the same as a mother raising me. My father and 2 brothers raised me. Most of the negative effects that were said on here are correct.
I so hope that you will read this for all I realise it is several years after your post. I could have written your post almost and I have never met anyone who suffers similarly to myself. My mother left home when I was 9, she had been very attentive and loving towards me and my brother but walked out one day while we were at school. My dad was emotionally not there at all and I really suffered as a sensitive young girl. I have never got over my mum (and the huge array of aunts cousins etc.) Even though I am in touch with her now I feel the bond is lost. She feels like someone i used to know and that mothers love is gone. I struggle everyday with emotions, relationships, everyday social situations, depression and anxiety. I don't know how to be is the only way I can describe it. I truly hope you are OK and thank you so much for your post xxxx
I grew up without my mother, she was a drug addict and left very soon after I was born. My dad has not gone into much detail about the whole situation. I'm not going to lie growing up without a mother was not the hardest, I didn't really think about what I was missing not having a mother because I never had one. I have found a few difficulties growing up due to this, I am quite confident in front of my friends and stuff but not very confident talking to girls, I also struggle to know what to say to girls. I think this is because my dad didn't have a girlfriend while I was growing up so I never had a mother figure meaning I didn't know what girls are interested in or are like. I act like a typical boy (boys don't guy) but truly are really sensitive. I get quite emotional thinking about my mum now I'm older (16yrs old) thinking what my life could've been. I don't feel anger towards my mum but I feel disappointed and believe we could never has a relationship anytime in the future. I never had a birthday card or anything.
So I do believe growing up without a mother has a affect on a child. I am extremely lucky though to have a dad that loved me so much and did an amazing job raising me by him self. Thank you hope this helped
So I do believe growing up without a mother has a affect on a child. I am extremely lucky though to have a dad that loved me so much and did an amazing job raising me by him self. Thank you hope this helped
Im 17. I was brought up by my grandparents who i class as my mother and father. My mum was never in my life, she chose men and drugs. My father is an alcoholic. I would say it hasn't massively affected me not having them in my life. I am really grateful to have such amazing grandparents. I would of loved to have a close relationship with parents but that bridge has sailed and im better of without them as they have only ever caused pain. I do suffer from anxiety, mainly my self esteem. I guess everyone reacts different to situations throughout life.
Original post by hol1234
Im 17. I was brought up by my grandparents who i class as my mother and father. My mum was never in my life, she chose men and drugs. My father is an alcoholic. I would say it hasn't massively affected me not having them in my life. I am really grateful to have such amazing grandparents. I would of loved to have a close relationship with parents but that bridge has sailed and im better of without them as they have only ever caused pain. I do suffer from anxiety, mainly my self esteem. I guess everyone reacts different to situations throughout life.
Do you deal with adversity well?
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Original post by hol1234
I wouldnt say I do. It does cross my mind at times though. I have just grown up to live with it and I have amazing family and friends
You should look up John bowlby's work on maternal deprivation
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Original post by paul514
I just googled that, i dont get it what its all about?
A lot of Bowlby's work has been discredited. The subjects he studied were child evacuees, delinquent children. His notion that crèches and nurseries are not suitable environments for young children, as he believed that this led to maternal deprivation. I was brought up in a care home and never met my parents. I had no problem bonding with my 7 children or my many grandchildren. His work is outdated.
He also believed that women should not work once they became mothers.
He also believed that women should not work once they became mothers.
Original post by Seamus123
A lot of Bowlby's work has been discredited. The subjects he studied were child evacuees, delinquent children. His notion that crèches and nurseries are not suitable environments for young children, as he believed that this led to maternal deprivation. I was brought up in a care home and never met my parents. I had no problem bonding with my 7 children or my many grandchildren. His work is outdated.
He also believed that women should not work once they became mothers.
He also believed that women should not work once they became mothers.
Yes but it's the basis for people to look up other researchers who followed up his work which is why it is relevant to mention here
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Original post by thoyub
We have all heard about the million children growing up without fathers but I wanted to draw attention to a rarer but similar issue, growing up without a mother.
What effects can this have on a child, especially if the mother is absent for practically all of the childs life? Also, if the mother neglected the child and never showed the child any love and basically abandoned the child. This could have bad psychological effects couldn't it?
Have any of you grown up without your mothers? I'd love to hear some of your experiences if you have.
How can growing up without a mother affect a child? Discuss.
What effects can this have on a child, especially if the mother is absent for practically all of the childs life? Also, if the mother neglected the child and never showed the child any love and basically abandoned the child. This could have bad psychological effects couldn't it?
Have any of you grown up without your mothers? I'd love to hear some of your experiences if you have.
How can growing up without a mother affect a child? Discuss.
Bowlby's Theory of Maternal deprivation *cough cough aqa psychology*
Original post by dmy15
Bowlby's Theory of Maternal deprivation *cough cough aqa psychology*
aiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiii
Original post by dmy15
Bowlby's Theory of Maternal deprivation *cough cough aqa psychology*
He's taught at undergraduate level too
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I know this is several years after the fact, but if my own experiences help I'm glad to input them. I'm a 37 year old male. My mother was mostly absent since birth. Though she was around more later on in life. My dad was a good father, and raised me by himself. The issues I've had in my adult life are interpersonal relationships with women, abandonment issues, depression, and social anxiety. Often I'll find myself in need of womanly comfort, yet if I'm rejected by a woman i feel I'm not good enough. Also I'll sometimes adopt an attitude of "if you don't want me, then f.... off". All unhealthy attitudes i know. I'm not making excuses here. Just trying to add input into possible effects of motherly abandonment. Hope this helps.
Original post by Seamus123
The reasons behind being reared without a mother are more relevant than the fact of being raised without a mother.
WOW! Incredibly powerful and sobering insight, which is exactly what was needed in this rightfully emotion-filled thread!
Depends on the: child, carers and environment. To what extent the neglect was at also plays a large role; what age the child in question was abandoned\neglected at goes hand in hand with the child's previous environment. So all these factors, plus a couple others I probably missed, can contribute to how the child turns out in the end. Its not as simple as asking the question "how will they turn out". But I never was in this situation so I wouldn't know.
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I think for most people, they will often go to their mum to discuss problems they face. Maybe for some, it would be their dad. However, you will turn to your mum for support at times and this is really important because the dad tends to be the one who is strict but the mum tends to be the one who is more encouraging? That's how I see it at least. There are certain topics that you don't feel comfortable discussing with your dad, so ultimately you will want to seek advice from your mum. I learnt in psychology a long time ago ( I have to be vague about it as I don't remember exactly what theory this is based on) that by identifying with your mum, you will learn to nurture your children in the future. Also, seeing other children with their mum will also make you feel sad if your mum is absent.
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