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Told him i didnt want/wasnt ready for a relationship now he wont even talk to me.

I got talking to this guy over facebook the other night, realised how much we had in common, we both found each other attractive, we were both single so decided to meet up the next day. We did and we had a great time, he was lovely and I found him attractive, but I was put off a little because he was rushing everything, not physically but talking about plans and things. It kinda scared me because its the first time id ever had a proper date(im 17) never had a boyfriend or anything(which he was shocked by) he told me we didn't have to rush anything and we will hang out and see how it goes,..but he was still rushing it slightly, he even said "if I ask you in 2 weeks if youll be my girlfriend what would you say?" I told him near the end of the night that I was unsure as I was scared of commitment and he seemed to understand, he said if all this fails we should still be mates because we had SO much in common. Stupidly the next day I text him and told him I didn't want a relationship and I didn't want to meet up with him for a bit as I like someone else(I don't) and that I felt I had to tell him now because I didn't want to lead him on, I told him that any girl would be lucky to have him. I don't know why I lied I guess it seems so close to him asking me out properly I got scared and thought of some excuse. I messaged him last night saying I loved his company and we should meet up as mates next week. It seemed he ignored my message so I text him asking me if he got my message he said he'd seen it but he's been really busy, so I said 'that's fine, so are you free next week to go out?', its been all day and he hasn't replied, yet he's been on fb and all. I just don't know what to do, im hurting because I want him as a friend, I loved his company and I don't reckon he'll ever want to see me again. Considering he said he felt so happy when he was around me and that we should still be mates even if everything fails? He completely contradicted everything he said. Should I message him again or leave it?. What should I say?..

Reply 1

Linnerzx

I would generally go by the "3 strikes and you're out" rule. If after that he still hasn't bothered to reply properly then I would leave it unless they decided to get in touch with you.

If you wanted to send one final message however, I would go somewhere along the lines of 'Listen, I'm really trying to make an effort here and genuinely want to be your friend. So if you want to keep giving me the cold shoulder that's fine but at least be honest with me like I have been with you. I really enjoyed hanging out with you but I'm not going to keep asking you and wait around for a reply, so the ball is in your court now, don't leave me hanging in the dark'

... maybe?

Reply 2

JOftw

He's being an ******* because of the rejection so is now trying to regain the power within your relationship by making you go after him. Talk to him again and of he doesn't respond drop him.

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Reply 3

ilem

Good for him, he's doing the right thing.

Reply 4

slappyhours

you essentially rejected him even if he was being a bit too pushy, and he doesn't like it. so he's ignoring you as if he's trying to hurt you back. leave your texts for a week or so and i'm sure he'll send an apologetic text/call when he's ready