Men: 10 rules for managing your penis

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Thank you, Suzanne Moore. Your article really helped me to realise that not washing your penis, public urination, rape and penis enlargement are bad things to do. What would I have done without it!?

Reply 21

ed-

What an incredibly self righteous and condescending article

Reply 22

Callumhamby

She seems to know an awful lot about penis'

Reply 23

Skip_Snip

As others have said, you'd see the silly feminazis get all riled, and their bras would spontaneously combust if a man had written a guide to vagina maintenence ,,,

Reply 24

ddaappoo

this has opened my eyes. many a time i have found myself inserting my genitals into household objects and into other men (especially whilst holidaying in russia and several african countries), without a care in the world. however due to this insightful and life-changing article, i am a changed man.
never again will i perform non-consensual sexual intercourse with an un-willing partner. never again will i name my genitalia.
thank you, the guardian.

thank you.

Reply 25

manic_fuzz

Nowadays I literally can't tell whether some 'journalists' are just attempting to gain the shock-factor in order to attract readers or whether they are genuinely just complete idiots, whichever it may be... it's annoying :K:

Reply 26

Logi

Rule 11 - do not insert your penis into this sexist moron.

Then again my warning may not be necessary after all...

Reply 27

Aoide

Oh, are you saying I shouldn't be forcing my penis into a vacuum cleaner? Well thank you for the tip, I've been wondering why I got all those awkward stares.

(edited 10 years ago)

Reply 28

the bear

so now we know that Master Bieber calls his special friend "Jerry";

do all male pop stars have names for their trouser trouts ?

For instance what does Harry off One Direction call his ?

Reply 29

Steevee

The Guardian :rolleyes:

Their 'Opinion Pieces' have about as much journalistic merit as the articles in the Daily Mail.

Reply 30

LoopyLinguist

'Don't stick it in a toaster' and 'Don't rape' on the same list? Nice.

I am biased though because I find Suzanne Moore infuriating.

Reply 31

LoopyLinguist

And can you imagine a male journalist telling woman what to do with their genitalia?

There would be outrage.

Reply 32

asmaamahamud

Original post by danielnkwocha

Some of these are smart, I agree there should be more male hygiene products out there.

As for "do not put your penis in household objects"... :rolleyes:

Ikr. A woman can be a household object.

Reply 33

Xotol

Original post by HashimKF

Can't believe people get paid to write this ****.

Even if it's ****, people still read it and make a fuss up over it, so she's just doing her job.

This is why I avoid the comments section in the Guardian like the plague, the crap it produces. :facepalm2:

Reply 34

SoftPunch

Original post by Xotol

Never have read Guardian, and em comments section in Daily Mail sounds like that too lol

Reply 35

aWildPidgey

I'm gonna write an article on how women should manage their vaginas. Oh, no wait, that'd be objectifying women and sexist and forbidden.

Reply 36

Skip_Snip

Original post by asmaamahamud

Ikr. A woman can be a household object.

Like a dishwasher? I agree :wink:

Reply 37

Pedd

The Guardian absolutely loves posting click-bait.

Reply 38

ThatPerson

Original post by Harley

This bit confuses me. By the title it seems homophobic but then she says it's right for Russia to be stripped of the games :confused:

I think (am hoping) that she meant for this article to be a joke, but has clearly failed spectacularly.

Unfortunately she probably was serious because she's caused controversy before with her stupid comments.

Reply 39

PricklyPorcupine

Original post by the bear

so now we know that Master Bieber calls his special friend "Jerry";

do all male pop stars have names for their trouser trouts ?

For instance what does Harry off One Direction call his ?

Nick or maybe Grimmy