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I hit my little sister in anger :(
I'm 18 years old and me and by younger sister who is 13 years old and me got into a huge fight.
I'm the kinda person who likes my own space and it started off with her refusing to leave my room and then when asked refusing to give back a jacket that she was wearing which she had taken out of my room without permission.
So basically we got into a huge fight, where she ended up striking me in the face and then without thought I shoved her back, telling her not to hit me again, and I may have hit her... I actually cant remember I was that angry. But anyway my older sister who's 22 years old eventually comes in and breaks us up and takes my younger sister away from me.
I don't know what to do. I feel so guilty, especially as it was such a stupid argument
what should I do ???
I'm the kinda person who likes my own space and it started off with her refusing to leave my room and then when asked refusing to give back a jacket that she was wearing which she had taken out of my room without permission.
So basically we got into a huge fight, where she ended up striking me in the face and then without thought I shoved her back, telling her not to hit me again, and I may have hit her... I actually cant remember I was that angry. But anyway my older sister who's 22 years old eventually comes in and breaks us up and takes my younger sister away from me.
I don't know what to do. I feel so guilty, especially as it was such a stupid argument
what should I do ???
Scroll to see replies
Apologise first and foremost.
Perhaps speak to her with your older sister as a mediator? Makes sure your younger sister knows you won't hit her again and you're sorry if you hurt her. Explain that you know what you did was wrong and you didn't mean it. After this you can't ever hit her again you have to realise she is a child and you are an adult so it is your responsibility to stay in control and keep calm no matter what she does.
Only you know if it was just a little shove or if you seriously hit her, if it's the former an apology should suffice. If it's the latter this is a far more serious issue. If you think your anger is a problem (which it may be if you got so angry you can't remember what you did) then you should look into things you can do to help control it (possibly therapy).
EDIT: OP I'm not trying to have a go at you and it's clear you know that you did something wrong and it's great you're trying to fix it. Sorry if I came across like I was telling you off.
Perhaps speak to her with your older sister as a mediator? Makes sure your younger sister knows you won't hit her again and you're sorry if you hurt her. Explain that you know what you did was wrong and you didn't mean it. After this you can't ever hit her again you have to realise she is a child and you are an adult so it is your responsibility to stay in control and keep calm no matter what she does.
Only you know if it was just a little shove or if you seriously hit her, if it's the former an apology should suffice. If it's the latter this is a far more serious issue. If you think your anger is a problem (which it may be if you got so angry you can't remember what you did) then you should look into things you can do to help control it (possibly therapy).
EDIT: OP I'm not trying to have a go at you and it's clear you know that you did something wrong and it's great you're trying to fix it. Sorry if I came across like I was telling you off.
(edited 10 years ago)
Original post by monkyvirus
Apologise first and foremost.
Perhaps speak to her with your older sister as a mediator? Makes sure your younger sister knows you won't hit her again and you're sorry if you hurt her. Explain that you know what you did was wrong and you didn't mean it. After this you can't ever hit her again you have to realise she is a child and you are an adult so it is your responsibility to stay in control and keep calm no matter what she does.
Only you know if it was just a little shove or if you seriously hit her, if it's the former an apology should suffice. If it's the latter this is a far more serious issue. If you think your anger is a problem (which it may be if you got so angry you can't remember what you did) then you should look into things you can do to help control it (possibly therapy).
Perhaps speak to her with your older sister as a mediator? Makes sure your younger sister knows you won't hit her again and you're sorry if you hurt her. Explain that you know what you did was wrong and you didn't mean it. After this you can't ever hit her again you have to realise she is a child and you are an adult so it is your responsibility to stay in control and keep calm no matter what she does.
Only you know if it was just a little shove or if you seriously hit her, if it's the former an apology should suffice. If it's the latter this is a far more serious issue. If you think your anger is a problem (which it may be if you got so angry you can't remember what you did) then you should look into things you can do to help control it (possibly therapy).
You can't be serious, she's the one who attacked him in the first place, he merely hit her while defending himself by pushing her away. It's not like he went out of his way to hit her. She's the one with anger issues. By all means he should say he's sorry for hitting her but so should she. Making a grovelling apology will only validate her behavior.
Original post by monkyvirus
Apologise first and foremost.
Perhaps speak to her with your older sister as a mediator? Makes sure your younger sister knows you won't hit her again and you're sorry if you hurt her. Explain that you know what you did was wrong and you didn't mean it. After this you can't ever hit her again you have to realise she is a child and you are an adult so it is your responsibility to stay in control and keep calm no matter what she does.
Only you know if it was just a little shove or if you seriously hit her, if it's the former an apology should suffice. If it's the latter this is a far more serious issue. If you think your anger is a problem (which it may be if you got so angry you can't remember what you did) then you should look into things you can do to help control it (possibly therapy).
Perhaps speak to her with your older sister as a mediator? Makes sure your younger sister knows you won't hit her again and you're sorry if you hurt her. Explain that you know what you did was wrong and you didn't mean it. After this you can't ever hit her again you have to realise she is a child and you are an adult so it is your responsibility to stay in control and keep calm no matter what she does.
Only you know if it was just a little shove or if you seriously hit her, if it's the former an apology should suffice. If it's the latter this is a far more serious issue. If you think your anger is a problem (which it may be if you got so angry you can't remember what you did) then you should look into things you can do to help control it (possibly therapy).
Uh oh...here comes the "Women/girls can do no wrong" brigade.
OP, ignore monkyvirus' advice. It's a load of rubbish.
Don't feel guilty about what you did. You were well within your right to hit her back after hitting you first.
Since you're the older one, it might be a good idea to initiate an adult conversation between both of you and resolve your differences. If she's not willing to cooperate and wants to continue trying to wind you up, you have to put her in her place.
Don't take crap from her. If she messes around, let her know who's boss.
Ya feel me?
(edited 10 years ago)
OP are you a female?
Posted from TSR Mobile
Posted from TSR Mobile
Original post by Anonymous
I'm 18 years old and me and by younger sister who is 13 years old and me got into a huge fight.
I'm the kinda person who likes my own space and it started off with her refusing to leave my room and then when asked refusing to give back a jacket that she was wearing which she had taken out of my room without permission.
So basically we got into a huge fight, where she ended up striking me in the face and then without thought I shoved her back, telling her not to hit me again, and I may have hit her... I actually cant remember I was that angry. But anyway my older sister who's 22 years old eventually comes in and breaks us up and takes my younger sister away from me.
I don't know what to do. I feel so guilty, especially as it was such a stupid argument
what should I do ???
I'm the kinda person who likes my own space and it started off with her refusing to leave my room and then when asked refusing to give back a jacket that she was wearing which she had taken out of my room without permission.
So basically we got into a huge fight, where she ended up striking me in the face and then without thought I shoved her back, telling her not to hit me again, and I may have hit her... I actually cant remember I was that angry. But anyway my older sister who's 22 years old eventually comes in and breaks us up and takes my younger sister away from me.
I don't know what to do. I feel so guilty, especially as it was such a stupid argument
what should I do ???
It's good and quite mature of you to realise your mistake.
(edited 10 years ago)
She hit you first.
Original post by Rajvir
Apologies and then take anger management classes.
Yeah take classes over one tiff with a sibling... its hardly a huge disorder OP has.. everyone is quick to jump to institutions for this sort of thing.
Just kiss and make up, give a bit of time for the dust to settle and then apologise sincerely. I'm sure a girl of 13 wouldn't have a great capacity to hold grudges, the argument sounds VERY typical, had many myself with my brothers haha.
I always have fights with my lil bro. Doesnt mean its wrong. Its what siblings do
Posted from TSR Mobile
Posted from TSR Mobile
OP doesn't need anger management, I'm pretty sure at one point or another siblings will get into scraps. I think you should apologise, particularly if you feel guilty about it. Then tell her not to nick your stuff again. Get your sister/other family in on that, they should hopefully make her apologise for her hitting you too.
Then just forget about it tbh. I guess you don't really have fights in your family (maybe its because of the age gaps) but me, my 18 year old sister and 13 year old brother are all fighting with one another at one point, and it all blows over and cools down overnight/within a few hours. Just apologise and move on, it happened not much else you can do. Obviously don't hit your sister again though!
Then just forget about it tbh. I guess you don't really have fights in your family (maybe its because of the age gaps) but me, my 18 year old sister and 13 year old brother are all fighting with one another at one point, and it all blows over and cools down overnight/within a few hours. Just apologise and move on, it happened not much else you can do. Obviously don't hit your sister again though!
Original post by AverageExcellence
Yeah take classes over one tiff with a sibling... its hardly a huge disorder OP has.. everyone is quick to jump to institutions for this sort of thing.
Just kiss and make up, give a bit of time for the dust to settle and then apologise sincerely. I'm sure a girl of 13 wouldn't have a great capacity to hold grudges, the argument sounds VERY typical, had many myself with my brothers haha.
Just kiss and make up, give a bit of time for the dust to settle and then apologise sincerely. I'm sure a girl of 13 wouldn't have a great capacity to hold grudges, the argument sounds VERY typical, had many myself with my brothers haha.
OK but the OP got so angry that they can't remember if they hit their sister again, to me thats sounds bad cause I've never got that angry nor do I know some one getting that angry that they forget. Maybe I'm comparing too much but kiss and make-up is the best solution.
Original post by Cable
Uh oh...here comes the "Women/girls can do no wrong" brigade.
OP, ignore monkyvirus' advice. It's a load of rubbish.
Don't feel guilty about what you did. You were well within your right to hit her back after hitting you first.
Since you're the older one, it might be a good idea to initiate an adult conversation between both of you and resolve your differences. If she's not willing to cooperate and wants to continue trying to bully you, you have to put her in her place.
Don't take crap from her. If she messes around, let her know who's boss.
Ya feel me?
OP, ignore monkyvirus' advice. It's a load of rubbish.
Don't feel guilty about what you did. You were well within your right to hit her back after hitting you first.
Since you're the older one, it might be a good idea to initiate an adult conversation between both of you and resolve your differences. If she's not willing to cooperate and wants to continue trying to bully you, you have to put her in her place.
Don't take crap from her. If she messes around, let her know who's boss.
Ya feel me?
Wow this is weird. His sister didn't try to beat him outside a pub its just a one off sibling fight, its not really a self defence or bullying issue, 'not taking crap' from a 13 year old is different in this situation.
Reminds me of my little brother and I, same age and everything. He always does this but I've learnt not to hit him after I did it to him once. I think you should apologise and speak to your sister about personal space: tell her that since you are older, she must respect you, at least knock etc. and get her to apologise to you.
Posted from TSR Mobile
Posted from TSR Mobile
Hey you had a fight with your sister, siblings have fights all the time lol.
It will be fine. If you are feeling guilty just say sorry and she'll probably say sorry back. Or, just let it cool down for a while and eventually you'll both get over it.
Also your sister hit you, and you hit her back. I'm not saying I condone violence, but I think it's kind of common. Not saying it's a good thing, but just that it happens, and you're not the only one in the world to have done this lol! It's not a big deal, you love your sister, and she loves you and you were heated up
It will be fine. If you are feeling guilty just say sorry and she'll probably say sorry back. Or, just let it cool down for a while and eventually you'll both get over it.
Also your sister hit you, and you hit her back. I'm not saying I condone violence, but I think it's kind of common. Not saying it's a good thing, but just that it happens, and you're not the only one in the world to have done this lol! It's not a big deal, you love your sister, and she loves you and you were heated up
(edited 10 years ago)
It's not that serious. I'm 18 and I get into stupid arguments with my younger sister all the time 
Just let things cool off for the rest of today and then see if things are better tomorrow and apologize if necessary.
Just let things cool off for the rest of today and then see if things are better tomorrow and apologize if necessary.Original post by Rajvir
OK but the OP got so angry that they can't remember if they hit their sister again, to me thats sounds bad cause I've never got that angry nor do I know some one getting that angry that they forget. Maybe I'm comparing too much but kiss and make-up is the best solution.
It doesn't sound like he blacked out in anger and didn't have a clue, he just wasn't sure if he hit her or pushed her, in retaliation, which happens in a split second, plus with all the adrenalin of the situation its understandable he can't recall specific information.
Original post by AverageExcellence
It doesn't sound like he blacked out in anger and didn't have a clue, he just wasn't sure if he hit her or pushed her, in retaliation, which happens in a split second, plus with all the adrenalin of the situation its understandable he can't recall specific information.
Oh ok maybe I read it too quickly, I guess then its understandable considering the situation.
Original post by Cable
Uh oh...here comes the "Women/girls can do no wrong" brigade.
OP, ignore monkyvirus' advice. It's a load of rubbish.
Don't feel guilty about what you did. You were well within your right to hit her back after hitting you first.
Since you're the older one, it might be a good idea to initiate an adult conversation between both of you and resolve your differences. If she's not willing to cooperate and wants to continue trying to wind you up, you have to put her in her place.
Don't take crap from her. If she messes around, let her know who's boss.
Ya feel me?
OP, ignore monkyvirus' advice. It's a load of rubbish.
Don't feel guilty about what you did. You were well within your right to hit her back after hitting you first.
Since you're the older one, it might be a good idea to initiate an adult conversation between both of you and resolve your differences. If she's not willing to cooperate and wants to continue trying to wind you up, you have to put her in her place.
Don't take crap from her. If she messes around, let her know who's boss.
Ya feel me?
Hang on a second, you're saying it's acceptable for an 18 year old to hit a child of 13?? You do realise there is a difference in maturity levels- it's more understandable why the 13 year old hit out because she is less mature and hasn't quite got full control of her emotions. And also the fact that an 18 year old hitting a 13 year old is likely to cause more pain than the other way around??
I completely disagree that the OP was perfectly entitled to hit back because of that.
Just because you assumed that the OP is male, you blindly brought out the 'a man is allowed to hit a woman back!!!11' card. Think about it rationally.
Having said that OP, you don't need to be told it's wrong because you know that. Besides, we've all done similar things. Just apologise and move on.
(edited 10 years ago)
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