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This girl I like; advice?

This will be a bit long, but bear with me:

I liked this girl for the past 2.5 years (although not full-blown crush, but she has been one of my closest friends). She's a year younger than me and we're from the same high school. We went to different colleges though (10+ hours apart), and now she's a junior at uni and I'm a senior.

Anyways, we used to tell each other about all our lives/troubles, etc. but about 8 months ago I had a life crisis (got kicked out of dad's house), which she helped me get through at first, but I changed a lot because of this. I ended up working constantly and became antisocial to many people (including her) and, as a result, did not see her during summer break.

We also have not talked for probably 4-5 months now, and I don't want to start anything because I (illogically) want to see if she does miss talking to me. Within these 8 past months though, she's already changed so much, made many new friends, joined a sorority. Before, she was very interested in close relationships?

Right now, I'm just not seeing/talking to her and work on myself.. in hopes that will somehow make her somehow miss me next time she sees me... it's dumb, I know. Any advice? I don't really completely crush on people anymore in my life, but if I could ever have a relationship I would choose her. Any feedback would be nice.
I don't understand what you want with this girl, a relationship? A fling? .... 10 hours away is a lot.

I'm in a similar circumstance, however I'm in a full on crush with a girl who lives in another country.

I would just focus on your studies/life before and look for girls closer to home.

If she hasn't started saying things like "I miss you" etc ... For 8 months, doubt she'll ever say it.


Posted from TSR Mobile
You can try. I told my best friend I like her after 2.5 years and I found out I was friendzoned. If you want to be with her, just ask her. I kept delaying it with her because I thought I wasn't ready. Truth is you never will be. Just tell her and see what she has to say.
Original post by Ken321
This will be a bit long, but bear with me:

I liked this girl for the past 2.5 years (although not full-blown crush, but she has been one of my closest friends). She's a year younger than me and we're from the same high school. We went to different colleges though (10+ hours apart), and now she's a junior at uni and I'm a senior.

Anyways, we used to tell each other about all our lives/troubles, etc. but about 8 months ago I had a life crisis (got kicked out of dad's house), which she helped me get through at first, but I changed a lot because of this. I ended up working constantly and became antisocial to many people (including her) and, as a result, did not see her during summer break.

We also have not talked for probably 4-5 months now, and I don't want to start anything because I (illogically) want to see if she does miss talking to me. Within these 8 past months though, she's already changed so much, made many new friends, joined a sorority. Before, she was very interested in close relationships?

Right now, I'm just not seeing/talking to her and work on myself.. in hopes that will somehow make her somehow miss me next time she sees me... it's dumb, I know. Any advice? I don't really completely crush on people anymore in my life, but if I could ever have a relationship I would choose her. Any feedback would be nice.


Isn't playing hard to get a bit difficult to do when you haven't been in contact with her for some time now ? I mean, you could be cruising the west side wearing a Hawaiian print shirt = BLEUGH!, having astronomy and management discussion with guy mates, drinking beer, getting drunk, having a ball playing footie, posing naked during nights out because your so drunk you have no idea where your clothes been all night...get the picture :hubba:...

But she wouldn't have a clue really of what you've been upto since you last spoke to her because your not in touch with her! How is she to know that you have decided to remain a bachelor for life or sth or chose to just be a player or be the type of guy who wants to settle down with the right girl someday ?!?!

You could still do all these and more. Your really busy yes, and you've lost interest in socializing, when it comes to certain people, but all this could be yours, you could have a happy life, except with the added advantage that you will also get to be with the girl you like. But you have to start by telling her first...soooooo get in touch with her soon, and then do the playing hard to get I think !
(edited 10 years ago)
Original post by Anonymous
You can try. I told my best friend I like her after 2.5 years and I found out I was friendzoned. If you want to be with her, just ask her. I kept delaying it with her because I thought I wasn't ready. Truth is you never will be. Just tell her and see what she has to say.


I know a mate who is like this. Poor guy...everytime I listen to Right Back Where I Started From by Bryan Adams I get reminded of him :cookie:!

Spoiler

(edited 10 years ago)
Reply 5
I guess I'm also looking at this situation 2-way; if I focus more on myself and become better as a person, etc. etc. then it's not like I'm completely hung up on her.

Original post by Fashion Girl


Isn't playing hard to get a bit difficult to do when you haven't been in contact with her for some time now ? I mean, you could be cruising the west side wearing a Hawaiian print shirt = BLEUGH!, having astronomy and management discussion with guy mates, drinking beer, getting drunk, having a ball playing footie, posing naked during nights out because your so drunk you have no idea where your clothes been all night...get the picture :hubba:...

But she wouldn't have a clue really of what you've been upto since you last spoke to her because your not in touch with her! How is she to know that you have decided to remain a bachelor for life or sth or chose to just be a player or be the type of guy who wants to settle down with the right girl someday ?!?!

You could still do all these and more. Your really busy yes, and you've lost interest in socializing, when it comes to certain people, but all this could be yours, you could have a happy life, except with the added advantage that you will also get to be with the girl you like. But you have to start by telling her first...soooooo get in touch with her soon, and then do the playing hard to get I think !


You make a good point; I might see & talk to her in person before the end of this year. Might try this a bit
Reply 6
Dude don't play the hard to get game, it only serves to boost your ego- keeping girls at arms length.
If you want her, go and get her. Let her know she is special to you (that last bit I wrote made me sick with the soppy tone).
Good Luck!

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