How do you know when you're in love?

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Reply 20

Maid Marian

I think love is more deeply rooted.

But I don't really know how people can tell the two apart. They overlap too much.

Reply 21

whisperingtears

Original post by Coke Or Pepsi

It's really hard to differentiate between infatuation and love. I think the best way to differentiate between them is time, and I think both love and infatuation begin in the same way..

You can't stop thinking about them. You want to spend all your time with them. You think you're going to be together forever. You build your whole future with them in your head. You see yourself committing to them for the rest of your life. You feel like you would never recover if they left you. They're the first thing you think about when you wake up, the last thing before you go to sleep. You just want to hold them and be held by them at night. Even if you argue, you don't care because you love them.

You know it's love if, even when all the crazy obsessive stuff/pink mist fades, you still feel like you want them to be a part of your life, and you still get that feeling that you couldn't be without them.

People get love and infatuation confused - I do too, and rightly so! When you want to be with one person all the time and all you want is them, then that is love to an extent.

I love this explanation. Especially the stuff about when butterflies fade, you're still in love of course. That's the difference between love and infatuation.

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Reply 22

Arieisit

I realised that I was infatuated. Thanks guys for your explanations and support.

Reply 23

Coke Or Pepsi

Heehee thanks :smile:

Original post by whisperingtears

I love this explanation. Especially the stuff about when butterflies fade, you're still in love of course. That's the difference between love and infatuation.

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Reply 24

Col. Hans Landa

Original post by battycatlady

My friend's dad once said to me 'You know you're in love when you can have a wee in front of each other and it's ok to do that' haha :P Silly really but I get where he's coming from :P

Maybe he just liked water sports :redface:

I agree though with all that you said.

Reply 25

canadamoose

I had a feeling after the infatuation period with my boyfriend that I loved him, and I had already said it to him previously, assuming that it was real. I knew for a fact that it was love when I was having a normal conversation with him a few months into the relationship, and I got an overwhelming feeling of happiness just looking at him and listening to him talk about something completely mundane. It only lasted a couple of minutes, but it really reinforced my belief that I was truly in love with him. It still happens on occasion - it isn't a constant feeling even though I always love him as a person, but that true romantic happiness shows up at the oddest of times when we're together.

The only other way I can think to explain it is in the nerdy terms of Harry Potter when he learns to create a Patronus. To get rid of the Dementors, you have to think of a time when you were truly happy, and that happiness will aid you in the spell. The momentary feeling of being in love with somebody when they've really done nothing special at all is the most elating sensation where your brain essentially won't let you think a single negative thought about that person or anyone else. It's the happiest, most optimistic feeling you could ever have, and it takes over you entirely. That's really the best I can explain it; it's hard to describe if you haven't felt it before, but it is absolutely worth it.

(edited 10 years ago)

Reply 26

Clone93

Original post by Arieisit

I mean, how do you know you're not just infatuated or full of lust?

Can I have your opinions? Gay men opinions would be greatly appreciated as I am a gay male myself.

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Love is natures way of letting you know you have too much money and are far too happy.

Reply 27

Plumstone

Original post by canadamoose

The only other way I can think to explain it is in the nerdy terms of Harry Potter when he learns to fly a broomstick. To lift off the ground, you have to think of a time when you were truly happy, and that happiness will aid you in flying.

I feel duty bound to point out that happy thoughts are not at all necessary for flying in Harry Potter. They are essential for flight (along with fairy dust) in Peter Pan and a happy memory is also required to create the Patronus, but there is no mention in books nor films of happy thoughts being needed to fly a broomstick in the world of Harry Potter.

Reply 28

MadeThisUp

Original post by Arieisit

I realised that I was infatuated. Thanks guys for your explanations and support.

completely anecdotal as ive never been in love. but apparently you 'know' when youre in love and dont even question it.

When it's too late.

Original post by Plumstone

That's definitely what I meant - not sure why I went with broomsticks since I usually know better! :smile:

Reply 31

tflanjee

D'awwwww I'm crying here, I'm so soppy. I thought it was just a myth...

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Reply 32

The Tuba

You can't really disagree with the above, both the infatuation and live for someone is subjective and can vary from person to person, there's no definitive way to know, you only know yourself when it comes.

Having said that, the song that most defines it to me would be the Impossible Dream by Mitch Leigh (originally)

As cheesy as that sounds :biggrin: