Depression and procrastination
Hi,
I am in my final year of university (English degree) and for the past 2 months have been in a deep and constant depression. I have suicidal thoughts most days and feel exhausted all day. I am going to see my doctor tomorrow, but my immediate worry is how I have an exam in 17 days and two 5000 word essays due in about 8 days.
I have done 1000/5000 of one essay and have all of the quotes/information I need. Apart from having some vague ideas for the second (the one due in first) I haven't even started it, although I read the texts a few months ago. Not done a single thing for it, though. Where my exam is concerned, I have to choose four authors to write about, and I haven't done a single thing for that either. 15 days to go. The only thing that makes me feel better about that is that it's a seen exam, so I get the questions 48 hours beforehand.
I keep telling myself I'm going to get out of bed and work all day, every day. I tell myself 'just 1000 words then you can rest' and I'm getting nowhere. I have always procrastinated, but this time it's different. I'm like a computer on standby. I'm furious with myself for leaving it this late and yet with all my worry that I have ruined my degree with just months before my graduation, I STILL cannot do what has to be done. I know it's not forced upon me, I know I can give it up at any point. I used to love studying and learning, now I have no interest in anything but lying down/wanting to die. I can't fail though.
I am not looking for sympathy, just some encouragement that I have not totally screwed up my degree. Two essays and a massive exam to study for in less than 2.5 weeks...it's do-able, right?
I am in my final year of university (English degree) and for the past 2 months have been in a deep and constant depression. I have suicidal thoughts most days and feel exhausted all day. I am going to see my doctor tomorrow, but my immediate worry is how I have an exam in 17 days and two 5000 word essays due in about 8 days.
I have done 1000/5000 of one essay and have all of the quotes/information I need. Apart from having some vague ideas for the second (the one due in first) I haven't even started it, although I read the texts a few months ago. Not done a single thing for it, though. Where my exam is concerned, I have to choose four authors to write about, and I haven't done a single thing for that either. 15 days to go. The only thing that makes me feel better about that is that it's a seen exam, so I get the questions 48 hours beforehand.
I keep telling myself I'm going to get out of bed and work all day, every day. I tell myself 'just 1000 words then you can rest' and I'm getting nowhere. I have always procrastinated, but this time it's different. I'm like a computer on standby. I'm furious with myself for leaving it this late and yet with all my worry that I have ruined my degree with just months before my graduation, I STILL cannot do what has to be done. I know it's not forced upon me, I know I can give it up at any point. I used to love studying and learning, now I have no interest in anything but lying down/wanting to die. I can't fail though.
I am not looking for sympathy, just some encouragement that I have not totally screwed up my degree. Two essays and a massive exam to study for in less than 2.5 weeks...it's do-able, right?
I don't know much, but as someone who has had clinical depression for nearly 6 years I totally get how you feel about the procrastination. I find what helps me is maybe doing a 10 min workout, or going for like a 10 minute jog to just feel a bit more awake and not so dead? So maybe if you like early mornings, do that when you get up and then come in and start doing some work. And I find repeating exercise every time I feel like I just want to die and lie down forever kind of helps to shake it a bit for a while 
.
I know it's really hard to bring yourself to actually start doing something, but maybe if you started setting timers on your phone to remind you do go and do something active for a bit could inspire you? You could even give yourself little 'kick up the arse' messages with the timer to make sure you actually do it as well.
Good luck with the next two weeks
. I know it's really hard to bring yourself to actually start doing something, but maybe if you started setting timers on your phone to remind you do go and do something active for a bit could inspire you? You could even give yourself little 'kick up the arse' messages with the timer to make sure you actually do it as well.
Good luck with the next two weeks
It is doable. Not easy, but doable.
Maybe you could start by breaking it down into even smaller steps - 1,000 words before resting is pretty difficult if you're struggling to start. Maybe start with saying even just 100 words, then allow yourself 10 minutes to do something else for a bit, then go back to it - you might find that once you start it's easier to continue and you don't always need to stop that often, but it does help to break it down more.
You've got 1,000 words of one of the essays done, that's one-fifth of it done already, and if you've got all the quotes and information you need that's a great starting point. Maybe for the other essay and the exam you could start just by writing down some key words or key points as ideas to start you off, making a basic plan, and then work from there.
Mostly important, do talk to your university about this. Your GP can write a supporting letter if you need concessions or extensions, and if you're struggling this much that's definitely worth considering, so your university should be happy to help. Have you got a personal tutor at your uni that you can talk to about the difficulties you're having?
Maybe you could start by breaking it down into even smaller steps - 1,000 words before resting is pretty difficult if you're struggling to start. Maybe start with saying even just 100 words, then allow yourself 10 minutes to do something else for a bit, then go back to it - you might find that once you start it's easier to continue and you don't always need to stop that often, but it does help to break it down more.
You've got 1,000 words of one of the essays done, that's one-fifth of it done already, and if you've got all the quotes and information you need that's a great starting point. Maybe for the other essay and the exam you could start just by writing down some key words or key points as ideas to start you off, making a basic plan, and then work from there.
Mostly important, do talk to your university about this. Your GP can write a supporting letter if you need concessions or extensions, and if you're struggling this much that's definitely worth considering, so your university should be happy to help. Have you got a personal tutor at your uni that you can talk to about the difficulties you're having?
i feel the exact same way
and i know how you feel
there's plenty of time and yes you can do it
and you won't mess it up i know it.
start slowly, wake up a new day and say this is the day i want to achieve.
Turn off your tv, phone any thing distracting, go to a quiet room and start, have a break in between, but never do anything entertaining in your breaks it will just distract you and won't let you go back.
Good luck, there's plenty of time. believe me we always think that we need much more time than we actually need. we exaggerate it in our minds to make us feel worse.
and i know how you feel
there's plenty of time and yes you can do it
and you won't mess it up i know it.
start slowly, wake up a new day and say this is the day i want to achieve.
Turn off your tv, phone any thing distracting, go to a quiet room and start, have a break in between, but never do anything entertaining in your breaks it will just distract you and won't let you go back.
Good luck, there's plenty of time. believe me we always think that we need much more time than we actually need. we exaggerate it in our minds to make us feel worse.
I probably can understand how do you feel, though.
No one's saying that you are searching for sympathy, I'm glad you are able to speak out it at least here.
I have been suffering from depression too, however it's been almost a year since I have overcome it. But thing is, I still suffer from outcome. I still have procrastination and concentration problems, but I wish to help you as much as it is possible.
You should speak with person that you trust the most or even cry your heart out, because the emotions need to be let out. Then take one day or two for a complete relaxation, clear your mind from all the worries, don't even try to think about university stuff.
When going for a work, you should hide/turn off all the distractions that are possible.
Myself, I'm trying to do this as much as possible as I have finals coming up.
Plus, you should really talk with your tutors or someone that is responsible for your studies about your mental health, don't ever try to hide it, they will have to understand it.
If possible, it's good to visit a psychologist or therapist (I'm not sure how people call them in the other countries) and they will issue the medication or treatment needed.
As one person mentioned above, exercising is one of the best things to fight the depression. Jogging/cycling in the parks or somewhere in the bare nature helped me a lot. Or swimming. It is just something that puts you off from the thinking for awhile and gives your brain some proper rest.
About your work that you have for now, everything is possible. However, you must not overwork yourself, try to divide the homework/studying/sleeping time fairly and don't let yourself to run away from the schedule!
I don't know, if I was able to help you or give something useful, but I hope you will be able to fight this well. Feel free to ask anything though!
No one's saying that you are searching for sympathy, I'm glad you are able to speak out it at least here.
I have been suffering from depression too, however it's been almost a year since I have overcome it. But thing is, I still suffer from outcome. I still have procrastination and concentration problems, but I wish to help you as much as it is possible.
You should speak with person that you trust the most or even cry your heart out, because the emotions need to be let out. Then take one day or two for a complete relaxation, clear your mind from all the worries, don't even try to think about university stuff.
When going for a work, you should hide/turn off all the distractions that are possible.
Myself, I'm trying to do this as much as possible as I have finals coming up.
Plus, you should really talk with your tutors or someone that is responsible for your studies about your mental health, don't ever try to hide it, they will have to understand it.
If possible, it's good to visit a psychologist or therapist (I'm not sure how people call them in the other countries) and they will issue the medication or treatment needed.
As one person mentioned above, exercising is one of the best things to fight the depression. Jogging/cycling in the parks or somewhere in the bare nature helped me a lot. Or swimming. It is just something that puts you off from the thinking for awhile and gives your brain some proper rest.
About your work that you have for now, everything is possible. However, you must not overwork yourself, try to divide the homework/studying/sleeping time fairly and don't let yourself to run away from the schedule!
I don't know, if I was able to help you or give something useful, but I hope you will be able to fight this well. Feel free to ask anything though!
(edited 10 years ago)
