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27, Virgin, Always been single, And hate females.

Don't think anyone said confidence is easy to obtain. Just because it's difficult to.build doesn't mean the OP shouldn't try. For example being fat was a complaint of his and it's well within his power to change that. Wallowing in self pity or trying to validate insecurity/negativity is not productive ever and that's why people are giving him this kind of advice. People should only focus on the things that are in their power to change.

It doesn't come across that way when advice is given. I see people say, "all you need is confidence". In my mind, they make it look like that is easy to obtain. I never said the OP shouldn't try. Being fat is something that he can change. I'm right with anybody that said he should go to the gym. Personality is extremely difficult to change. It gets much harder as you get older. This is all I have said. That doesn't mean he shouldn't try. If the OP doesn't like my posts, he's free to ignore everything I have said. That's up to him.

Reply 101

irfanz11

Original post by Ribbit1234

Get help. Lose weight go to the gym. I hate when fat people complain about being fat and dont do anything about it

Have a heart mate, cmon. He clearly isn't only worried about being fat. He's lost all confidence in him and we should aim to restore that. If you wanna have an immature virtual rant, I suggest you jump on fb or twitter :hand:

Reply 102

sl1k

A good way to help with self esteem and confidence is to take up a social hobby. When I go through a rough patch I usually spend a weekend airsofting, it stimulates me too which is a bonus. Get to communicate with a big group of different people that i've never met before who have no ties with any of my social circles.

Reply 103

Ribbit1234

15

Original post by irfanz11

Have a heart mate, cmon. He clearly isn't only worried about being fat. He's lost all confidence in him and we should aim to restore that. If you wanna have an immature virtual rant, I suggest you jump on fb or twitter :hand:

Yh but if he lost some weight it could help. N im being nice and giving my advice

Reply 104

x-pixie-x

8

Original post by Bassetts

Women want taller men. It's a fact of life, just like the sky is blue and the grass is green. You're very naïve to think looks and height don't matter. They're HUGELY important.

Considering you were still a virgin recently and have no experience with girls, I doubt you're the best person to get advice from

Reply 105

Little Wolf Taima

11

I used to sound alot like you only to top it all off I couldn't get a guy to have a relationship with me with consensual, guilt-free sex, but I would always have to be assaulted by some creepy guy in the street. I really did have every reason to hate me.. until one day I left my heart open just one more time where there was potential to get hurt. And I met a man like you. He was a 25 year old virgin who hated women. No friends, nerdy and antisocial. I told him about all the awful things men had done to me. We had a few mutual interests like technology and pot and opened eachother's eyes.

He still doesn't fit my idea of conventional attractiveness, and he said he didn't even like black women either. But neither of us really care. We were so on the brink of giving up and just becoming bitter/hateful. He could have gotten a prostitute, I could have been a pornstar. I even considered prostitution myself because i thought no one would ever want me as a long term thing and people liked my sexy pictures, not my personality/hobbies.

The internet is a wonderful place. Trawl around. Make friends with women. You have to let go of your preconceptions or it will push them away, though I know from experience being too giving means people take advantage of you. My current BF could have pushed me away on so many occasions if I hadn't realised it was all his insecurity/woman-fear/hatred talking, not him.

I'm sure you are a decent person, otherwise you wouldn't sound so guilty about your negative attitudes. They stem from how people have treated you and that is understandable, but not everyone will be that awful. I hope you meet someone who you can build a bond of trust with, and you can restrain yourself just a little so that she doesn't feel you ONLY want her for sex. I was sick of people using me for sex, but my current BF had resigned himself to the idea of never getting sex. Because he never pressured me, guess what? I'm the one dressing up in kinky costumes and nagging him for it 3 times a day when we're together,because I know he values me as a human being.

I can't be the only girl in the world out there like this! I'm 5 ft too! And to be honest, a guy closer to my height would be nicer! There is probably a 4ft 11 vixen out there who would take the time to get to know the real you if you stop feeling bitter about not having her right now... she might materialize somewhere. Don't give up.

Reply 106

Studentus-anonymous

12

Original post by johnsonn

What should I do?

1. realise that entertaining and dwelling in your negative bitter feelings only serves to make you less attractive.

2. Girls smell desperation. Learn to love yourself and life beyond sex and you'll appear more confident and attractive without immediately conveying this heavy aura of depressive desperation.

3. Seek to improve yourself. Improve your state of mind, improve your social skills, improve your fitness, your fashion, improve improve improve. You're not happy with yourself? Do something about it. Nothing will change if you continue to wallow.

4. let's be honest, this is probably down to your warped standards. You mention basically settling, but fact is if you're going to aim too high then you're never going to get there. If you keep yearning for the type of woman who is generally unattracted to the kind of man you are then no joy. You don't need to get Jessica Alba/hottie of choice here to fill fulfilled sexually and romantically. if you think being 5ft is an issue then why aren't you aiming for girls your height or shorter?

5. You can keep arguing till you're blue in the face but the fact of the matter is if you want a chance to meet a woman who is good for you then you need to go out and socialise and meet women.

lastly I'd probably try therapy to help you talk out and overcome your irrational highly strung emotions and feelings towards women. They've done nothing wrong, it's you who has the warped outlook.

best of luck fella.

(edited 10 years ago)

Reply 107

Anonymous #2

Original post by x-pixie-x

Considering you were still a virgin recently and have no experience with girls, I doubt you're the best person to get advice from

His post was saying that looks and height are important. That's essentially impossible to disagree with, it's so obviously right.

I can't think of anyone in real life who would disagree with the statement that height and looks are important. Only on TSR would people try to seriously argue that those things don't matter...

Reply 108

x-pixie-x

8

Original post by Anonymous

His post was saying that looks and height are important. That's essentially impossible to disagree with, it's so obviously right.

I can't think of anyone in real life who would disagree with the statement that height and looks are important. Only on TSR would people try to seriously argue that those things don't matter...

They're not the be all and end all, that might be the case for some but you can't tar everyone with the same brush. Both me and my boyfriend weren't attracted to each other physically when we first met. Personality was the most important thing, as well as a sense of humour. I grew to liking him physically through getting to know him, and I'm sure I'm not the only one.

And I still think that someone with no experience of what they're talking about should not say things as if they have loads of knowledge.

Reply 109

garythanie

3

Original post by johnsonn

Title says it...

Being single is just a normal part of life, just as much as having no self esteem and no self worth, just as much as no girl wanting to kiss you, touch you, or spend time with you...

That to me is life, just deal with it. that's normal, everyone has to put up with ****, this is my ****...

No matter who you go to for help, they always have an opinion. That opinion seams so fake unreal, and almost so offensive because it come from someone who has been fulfilled sexually, emotionally, at least had some sort of embrace of passion.

I used to love hanging out with girls I was raised by so many of them, now. It puts me on edge to be around them unless I'm inebriated in one sense or another. When I can feel free.

Otherwise I hate they way I feel around them, it puts me on edge I feel like I have to constantly be on guard like I'm a business selling its only product and it's either sink or swim... It seams so trivial to you though. What I hate most about me is why is passion embedded so deep in me. I wish I could cut it out get rid of it and live a normal life, but my head is programmed to think this way.

I'm meant to be a man yet I can't go out and get the one thing that my brain is craving, that my hormones crave, that my DNA is telling me to get... I have to suppress all that. It makes me feel like I'm in child in a sea of men, I have no chance. Which makes me feel undesired, unneeded, unwanted, a failure.

I could wait till I get older 30's get a steady job after my degree get a girlfriend, but there this voice in my head saying why couldn't I get a girl 5 yeas ago? is it because they could of done better then? Looks where better then, everyone looks better when they are younger, Is it because they where with guys better looking that me? I feel like I'm gonna be someone who just get left with the leftovers (It sounds vile to talk about a woman like that, I know but its the twisted way my brain thinks) You hear it, I deal with it. I wish I could cut sex/lust/passion/attraction/love out of my brain.

I hate the fact everyone can be so open about it, can run around and have sex so casually it feels like real star-crossed love is dead. But I can not comment. I don't know what love is. And at 27 this scares me the most as much as I don't think I can love properly. I have bad Anxiety, Panic Attacks and Night terrors which I'm almost 99% sure is due to being alone.

I have not been myself for such a long time I don't know what being myself feels like. I have been dead for a while, for so long I feel like I'm not real, because I'm not who I was. I haven't been who i was for 10 years.

I'm not depressed, I'm alone emotionally, physically and sexually. No pill that the doctor tries to prescribe me can fix that.

You really think that getting out more, socializing fixes this? Would socializing fix that fact I'm 5.0ft and unattractive? This feeling been there ever since my hormones switched on forcing me to feel something I can't express. I don't want to end up being one of them 60 year old desperate guy in Thailand going after young girls, I would rather slit my wrists but I feel that's the way I'm going. No one plans to be a drug addict, but bad **** just happens.

My friends don't know this, I am not gonna tell them, they can not replicate or synthesize this feeling. I'm always the one to listen to them and sympathize and be happy, to have fun with. I Would not want them to hear this about me.

I don't know what to do. short, fat and ugly a failure as a man. I couldn't pull a skinny girl in a tug of war, let alone get one to kiss me.

What should I do?

Apart from get a cat....

Don't listen to Meghan Trainor's - "No"

Reply 110

fred084757

1

Original post by johnsonn

Title says it...

Being single is just a normal part of life, just as much as having no self esteem and no self worth, just as much as no girl wanting to kiss you, touch you, or spend time with you...

That to me is life, just deal with it. that's normal, everyone has to put up with ****, this is my ****...

No matter who you go to for help, they always have an opinion. That opinion seams so fake unreal, and almost so offensive because it come from someone who has been fulfilled sexually, emotionally, at least had some sort of embrace of passion.

I used to love hanging out with girls I was raised by so many of them, now. It puts me on edge to be around them unless I'm inebriated in one sense or another. When I can feel free.

Otherwise I hate they way I feel around them, it puts me on edge I feel like I have to constantly be on guard like I'm a business selling its only product and it's either sink or swim... It seams so trivial to you though. What I hate most about me is why is passion embedded so deep in me. I wish I could cut it out get rid of it and live a normal life, but my head is programmed to think this way.

I'm meant to be a man yet I can't go out and get the one thing that my brain is craving, that my hormones crave, that my DNA is telling me to get... I have to suppress all that. It makes me feel like I'm in child in a sea of men, I have no chance. Which makes me feel undesired, unneeded, unwanted, a failure.

I could wait till I get older 30's get a steady job after my degree get a girlfriend, but there this voice in my head saying why couldn't I get a girl 5 yeas ago? is it because they could of done better then? Looks where better then, everyone looks better when they are younger, Is it because they where with guys better looking that me? I feel like I'm gonna be someone who just get left with the leftovers (It sounds vile to talk about a woman like that, I know but its the twisted way my brain thinks) You hear it, I deal with it. I wish I could cut sex/lust/passion/attraction/love out of my brain.

I hate the fact everyone can be so open about it, can run around and have sex so casually it feels like real star-crossed love is dead. But I can not comment. I don't know what love is. And at 27 this scares me the most as much as I don't think I can love properly. I have bad Anxiety, Panic Attacks and Night terrors which I'm almost 99% sure is due to being alone.

I have not been myself for such a long time I don't know what being myself feels like. I have been dead for a while, for so long I feel like I'm not real, because I'm not who I was. I haven't been who i was for 10 years.

I'm not depressed, I'm alone emotionally, physically and sexually. No pill that the doctor tries to prescribe me can fix that.

You really think that getting out more, socializing fixes this? Would socializing fix that fact I'm 5.0ft and unattractive? This feeling been there ever since my hormones switched on forcing me to feel something I can't express. I don't want to end up being one of them 60 year old desperate guy in Thailand going after young girls, I would rather slit my wrists but I feel that's the way I'm going. No one plans to be a drug addict, but bad **** just happens.

My friends don't know this, I am not gonna tell them, they can not replicate or synthesize this feeling. I'm always the one to listen to them and sympathize and be happy, to have fun with. I Would not want them to hear this about me.

I don't know what to do. short, fat and ugly a failure as a man. I couldn't pull a skinny girl in a tug of war, let alone get one to kiss me.

What should I do?

Apart from get a cat....

everyone has insecurities, youre not the only one. Beauty is subjective. First you have to work on yourself, find something your passionate about, make new friends. There's always someone who is very similar to you out there, you just have to go out and find that person. There is more to life than girls, if you feel sexually unfulfilled you always have other mthods eg hand etc. Just have fun and relax. If youre relaxed and having fun they will too.

Reply 111

hahaurgay111

1

your sad just give up you must be ugly af

Reply 112

sandytablet

20

Please don’t worry. Females are humans, too! People are all individuals and not everyone is the same. If you have trouble talking to girls then just try to speak to them like a normal person. Don’t try to impress them or be cocky or rude. Be a decent human. This is the basic standard with all humans.

You need to learn to relax. You could be in a much worse position. The more you worry about interacting with girls the worse you will do.

Most importantly, you need to learn to love yourself. You ARE beautiful, and it’s true! I can see it; you don’t need to see your appearance to be beautiful. You need to be mindful. Cut yourself some slack and know that everyone is definitely not perfect.

Try starting by pointing out the things you like about yourself. You may say you like nothing, but we both know but that’s not true.

Attractiveness can be enhanced through hygiene, the way you speak, your hairstyle, clothing and more. The more confident and positive you will be will deem you as more attractive.

Good luck!

Reply 113

xx1t35

14

Original post by johnsonn

Title says it...

Being single is just a normal part of life, just as much as having no self esteem and no self worth, just as much as no girl wanting to kiss you, touch you, or spend time with you...

That to me is life, just deal with it. that's normal, everyone has to put up with ****, this is my ****...

No matter who you go to for help, they always have an opinion. That opinion seams so fake unreal, and almost so offensive because it come from someone who has been fulfilled sexually, emotionally, at least had some sort of embrace of passion.

I used to love hanging out with girls I was raised by so many of them, now. It puts me on edge to be around them unless I'm inebriated in one sense or another. When I can feel free.

Otherwise I hate they way I feel around them, it puts me on edge I feel like I have to constantly be on guard like I'm a business selling its only product and it's either sink or swim... It seams so trivial to you though. What I hate most about me is why is passion embedded so deep in me. I wish I could cut it out get rid of it and live a normal life, but my head is programmed to think this way.

I'm meant to be a man yet I can't go out and get the one thing that my brain is craving, that my hormones crave, that my DNA is telling me to get... I have to suppress all that. It makes me feel like I'm in child in a sea of men, I have no chance. Which makes me feel undesired, unneeded, unwanted, a failure.

I could wait till I get older 30's get a steady job after my degree get a girlfriend, but there this voice in my head saying why couldn't I get a girl 5 yeas ago? is it because they could of done better then? Looks where better then, everyone looks better when they are younger, Is it because they where with guys better looking that me? I feel like I'm gonna be someone who just get left with the leftovers (It sounds vile to talk about a woman like that, I know but its the twisted way my brain thinks) You hear it, I deal with it. I wish I could cut sex/lust/passion/attraction/love out of my brain.

I hate the fact everyone can be so open about it, can run around and have sex so casually it feels like real star-crossed love is dead. But I can not comment. I don't know what love is. And at 27 this scares me the most as much as I don't think I can love properly. I have bad Anxiety, Panic Attacks and Night terrors which I'm almost 99% sure is due to being alone.

I have not been myself for such a long time I don't know what being myself feels like. I have been dead for a while, for so long I feel like I'm not real, because I'm not who I was. I haven't been who i was for 10 years.

I'm not depressed, I'm alone emotionally, physically and sexually. No pill that the doctor tries to prescribe me can fix that.

You really think that getting out more, socializing fixes this? Would socializing fix that fact I'm 5.0ft and unattractive? This feeling been there ever since my hormones switched on forcing me to feel something I can't express. I don't want to end up being one of them 60 year old desperate guy in Thailand going after young girls, I would rather slit my wrists but I feel that's the way I'm going. No one plans to be a drug addict, but bad **** just happens.

My friends don't know this, I am not gonna tell them, they can not replicate or synthesize this feeling. I'm always the one to listen to them and sympathize and be happy, to have fun with. I Would not want them to hear this about me.

I don't know what to do. short, fat and ugly a failure as a man. I couldn't pull a skinny girl in a tug of war, let alone get one to kiss me.

What should I do?

Apart from get a cat....

Maybe you're single because you 'hate females'. No female wants to go out with someone who talks **** about their sex for no reason

Reply 114

username1221160

19

4 year old thread.

The author of the OP has either changed his attitude and is in a happy relationship or has become even more bitter and hateful and will no doubt never get laid